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NASTY BITCH 2004-04-16
NASTY, NASTY LITTLE BITCH SHE MADE MY FUCK'N PECKER
ITCH. WHAT A SLUT THAT WILDABEAST. HER BIG FAT CUNT WAS FULL
OF YEAST.
0 評論, 6 瀏覽次數,
48 票
,0.25 分數
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Snail`s pace 2004-04-16
There is a bang on the door. Man answers and sees a snail on
the step looking at him. He picks up the snail and throws
it as far away as he can.
Three years later, another bang on the door. Man opens it,
and same snail is there. Snail looks up at him and says "So
what the hell was that all about then?!"
0 評論, 19 瀏覽次數,
27 票
,2.82 分數
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12 Shots 2004-04-16
A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking
them as fast as he can.
The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so
fast?"
<br>
The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had
what I had."
<br>
The bartender says, "What do you have?"
<br>
The guy says, "75 cents."
0 評論, 10 瀏覽次數,
47 票
,8.24 分數
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Nuclear Power 2004-04-15
Two strangers are sitting in an adjacent seats in airplane.
One guy Says to the other, "Let's talk."
I hear that the flight will go faster if you strike up a conversation
with your fellow passenger."
<br>
The other guy, who had just opened a good book, closes it
slowly, takes off his glasses and asks, "What would
you like to discuss?"
<br>
The first guy says, "Oh, ...
0 評論, 13 瀏覽次數,
41 票
,9.04 分數
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Toronto Maple Leafs 2004-04-15
Little Johnny was in his class when the teacher asked the
what their fathers did for a living.
<br>
All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman,
etc...
<br>
Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the
teacher asked him about his father.
<br>
"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret
and takes off all his clothes in front ...
0 評論, 42 瀏覽次數,
22 票
,7.45 分數
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So a Woman walks into a doctor's office..... 2004-04-15
So a Woman walks into a doctor's office and says to the
doctor, "My breasts are sore!"
<br>
The doctor removes her shirt and examines her ample boobs.
He then says, "There is only one cure, we must num them
up."
<br>
She asks "Will it hurt? I don't like the idea of
a needle going there!"
<br>
"No, in fact, you'll probably not mind this at
all." he ...
0 評論, 15 瀏覽次數,
56 票
,5.35 分數
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snow plow 2004-04-15
How do you change a dish washer into a snow plow?
<br>
Give her a shovel.
<br>
Why don't women wear wrist watches?
<br>
There's a clock on the stove.
1 評論, 92 瀏覽次數,
18 票
,0.67 分數
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Wisconsin Study 2004-04-15
A study in Wisconsin showed that the kind of male face a woman
finds attractive can differ depending on where a woman
is in her menstrual cycle. For instance, if she is ovulating,
she is likely to be attracted to men with more rugged and
masculine features. If she is menstruating, she is likely
to be impressed by a man with scissors through his temple
and a bat shoved up his ass.
0 評論, 11 瀏覽次數,
18 票
,6.67 分數
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Revenue Canada 2004-04-15
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest
man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender
would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass,
and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze
one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people
had tried over time weight-lifters, longshoremen, etc.)
but nobody could do it. One ...
0 評論, 6 瀏覽次數,
13 票
,4.32 分數
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why i fired my secretary 2004-04-14
why i fired my secretary >-----------------------------
<br>
> >Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't
feeling too good that morning.
I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and
say "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a
present for me.
As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning,
let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that's ...
0 評論, 32 瀏覽次數,
45 票
,8.12 分數
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3 Presidents 2004-04-14
An American is trying to come back from his vacation in Mexico,
when he realizes he’s lost all of his I.D.
He says to the Border Patrol officer, “I lost my passport,
but I have the presidents tattooed on my ass. Is that proof
enough that I’m and American?"
The guard agrees to take a look. After examining his tattoo’s,
the guard says, “Okay ...
2 評論, 300 瀏覽次數,
20 票
,3.76 分數
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Kept in the dark! 2004-04-13
There was this couple that had been married for a great many
years. Every time they made love, the husband always insisted
on turning out the lights. Well, after 30 years, the wife
felt that this was ridiculous, and decided to try and break
her husband's habit.
So one night, while in the middle of a romantic love making
session, she turned on the lights, only to discover that
her ...
0 評論, 7 瀏覽次數,
3 票
,5.39 分數
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Welfare mom 2004-04-13
A woman walks into a welfare office, trailed by 15 .
"WOW!" exclaimed the Social worker, "Are
these all yours!?" "Yep! Theys all mine!"
the flustered mom retorted, having heard the question
a thousand times before. "Well then, you must be here
to sign up for assistance, " said the Social worker,
"I'll need to get all your 's names
and birthdates."
"This one here is, LeRoy. He's the ...
0 評論, 31 瀏覽次數,
9 票
,6.42 分數
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what's fuck'in? 2004-04-13
jr. comes home from school one day and says to his pa "pa
what's fuck'in?" pa says "jr. you
don't know what fuck'in is?" pa turns to
ma and says "ma, it's time we teach jr. bout fuck'in."
ma goes into the bedroom and takes off all her clothes and ...
1 評論, 28 瀏覽次數,
7 票
,1.51 分數
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Ethical Dilemma - What would you do!? 2004-04-13
You're driving along in your car, on a dark, cold, and
stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop with three people
waiting on the bus:
1.) An old woman who looks as though she is about to die.
2.) An old friend who you owe your life to.
3.) The perfect partner that you have been dreaming about
meeting all your life.
Knowing that the bus can't get through for hours ...
0 評論, 12 瀏覽次數,
13 票
,7.00 分數
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This site is a fucking JOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2004-04-13
This site is a fucking joke! My wife & I are HOT AS HELL
& the only responses we get are from FAT chicks or FAKES,
that want us to pay to see there pussy's, I never paid
for a piece of ass, & I sure as fuck ain't going to
start now. Like I said this site is a FUCKING JOKE, does anyone
else agree
0 評論, 9 瀏覽次數,
13 票
,0.29 分數
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Romance Mathmatics 2004-04-12
ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
<br>
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
<br>
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
<br>
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy
<br>
<br>
OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss ...
0 評論, 21 瀏覽次數,
3 票
,5.39 分數
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GWB and Kobe 2004-04-11
What was George Bush's reaction when he heard that
Sprite was going to drop Kobe as a sponsor?
<br>
Ehh, who cares, I'm a coke man.
0 評論, 41 瀏覽次數,
1 票
,5.00 分數
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shoplifting 2004-04-10
If you a prostitue, isn't that technically shoplifting?
0 評論, 16 瀏覽次數,
41 票
,0.02 分數
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is calcium good for you 2004-04-10
How much calcium do you get from sucking on a nipple??
<br>
Apparantely enough to grow a bone!!!
0 評論, 10 瀏覽次數,
74 票
,6.67 分數
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Fish Tale 2004-04-10
Two sperm were swimming and suddenly one of em looks at the
other and asks "are we close to the uterus?"
"The uterus?" says the second. Hell, I don't
know. I just got past the esophagus.
0 評論, 10 瀏覽次數,
49 票
,6.23 分數
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You've just been fucked.... 2004-04-07
You've just joined this site. Mainly because you are
a loser and don't really have much to offer anyone.
You are married and your love life sucks. You are a workaholic
and spend most of your time working or on business trips.
After constant naging and the sex realization that you
can not fulfill your wifes sexual desires you allow another
man to fuck you wife. You enjoy watching and he ...
0 評論, 24 瀏覽次數,
13 票
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Michael Jackson 2004-04-07
Q:What's the difference between Michael Jackson
and a plastic bag?
A ne is dangerous for your to play with, the other
holds groceries.
0 評論, 3 瀏覽次數,
11 票
,5.78 分數
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3 drunk guys 2004-04-07
Three friends are talking about one night the previous
week in which they all got hammered.
<br>
The first guy says, "I was so drunk, the first thing
I did when I got home was blow chunks."
<br>
The second guy says, "I didn't even make it into
my house. I fell asleep on the lawn."
<br>
The third guy says, "You guys had it easy. I got arrested
for DUI."
...
0 評論, 30 瀏覽次數,
40 票
,3.80 分數
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craps 2004-04-07
Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table.
<br>
A very attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty-thousand
dollars on a single roll of the dice.
<br>
She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much
luckier when I'm completely nude."
<br>
With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice
and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!"
...
0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數,
20 票
,5.55 分數
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sex shop 2004-04-07
A little old lady with blue hair enters a sex shop and asks
in a quivering voice, "Y-y-young man, d-d-do y-you
s-sell d-d-dildos h-here?"
<br>
The salesman, somewhat taken aback by the little old lady’s
appearance in his shop, says, "Uh, yes, ma’am, we
do."
<br>
The little old lady, holding her quivering hands about
10 inches apart, asks, "D-do y-you ...
0 評論, 8 瀏覽次數,
76 票
,8.37 分數
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get rich quick 2004-04-07
A knockout young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick.
So, she proceeded to find herself a rich 73 year old man,
planning to screw him to death on their wedding night. The
courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in
spite of the half-century age difference.
<br>
On the first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed,
and waited for him to come out of the bathroom ...
0 評論, 9 瀏覽次數,
29 票
,6.75 分數
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hair growth 2004-04-07
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the
doctor had prescribed testosterone (a male hormone) for
her. She was a little worried about some of the side effects
she was experiencing.
<br>
"Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me
have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're
giving me too much. I've started growing hair in places
that I've never grown hair ...
0 評論, 15 瀏覽次數,
20 票
,4.27 分數
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elephant trunk 2004-04-07
A man has an operation to lengthen his dick, which involved
the insertion of a baby elephants trunk. Two weeks later
he is back in action and he takes a young lady out to dinner.
Halfway through the meal his member pops out of his trousers,
whips up onto the table, grabs a bread roll and then disappears.
The young lady didn't believe her eyes, so she ignored
it and continued with her meal. ...
0 評論, 7 瀏覽次數,
19 票
,5.37 分數
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paratrooper 2004-04-07
A young man joined the Army and signed up with the para- troopers.
He went though the standard training, completed the practice
jumps from higher and higher structures, and finally went
to take his first jump from an airplane. The next day, he
called home to his father to tell him the news.
<br>
"So, did you jump?" the father asked.
<br>
"Well, let me tell you what ...
0 評論, 28 瀏覽次數,
19 票
,4.18 分數
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