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Lady Be Good   by Greta Christina

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Reviewer Greta Christina has worked in and around the sex industry for over a decade writing about it, editing books about it, and living it. She edited Paying For It, a collection of articles by all kinds of sex workers: dommes, escorts, peep show girls, T-girls. Her novella called Bending is out in Susie Bright's book Three Kinds of Asking For It (published by Simon & Schuster and can be found at amazon.com). In response to overwhelming member requests for reviews of sex toys, sexy films, and other sex whatnots, Ms. Christina brings her girl-about-sex wisdom twice monthly to AdultFriendFinder. You can check out Ms. Christina on her web site, gretachristina.com.



Lady Finger, $18.00
Made by Doc Johnson
Available at [extern url='http://www.goodvibes.com' target='_blank' text='Good Vibrations'].

If you like bullet-style vibrators, but you find them annoying to hold with your fingers when you use them on your clit or your nipples, this could be a very good toy for you.

I could probably end the review right there. But that wouldn't be much fun, would it?

Here's the thing. One of my favorite vibrators is a bullet-style one (the Pulse-Right, also available at Good Vibes). It's one of the very few new sex toys I've tried in the last few years that's actually made it into my regular rotation. It's a perfect little battery-op vibrator for me -- it's small and doesn't get in the way, it's portable so I can use it wherever the hell I want (perfect for watching porn in the living room), it’s got some nice teasy pulse settings to get me good and worked up. And most importantly, it has a kick like a mule ‒ a relentless, high-frequency buzz that makes me whimper for mercy and then beg for more. It's seriously intense for such a compact little toy.

But my one real complaint about the Pulse-Right is that it’s hard to hold in place. It sometimes slips out of your fingers when it gets all wet and slippery, and when you do have a good grip on it, it tends to both dampen the vibrations and make your fingerbones rattle in their joints. This is far from a deal-breaker; it's hardly a major design flaw ‒ but it does make the toy more of an A-, rather than a perfect A+.

And I'm not the only one who feels this way. Lots of women like to use bullet vibes on their clits, in addition to (or instead of) putting them inside their cunts. But bullet vibes are clearly not designed for that. They're designed for insertion, to put inside your pussy, and when you try to use them on your clit, you run into the slip 'n' slide problem.

The Lady Finger is designed to fix this exact problem. It's pretty much your basic battery-powered bullet vibrator, a little bigger than most. But on one side of the bullet is a little grooved pad, just the right size to set your finger into… so you're not holding on to the bullet directly.

It's a simple concept, actually, and I'm surprised nobody's thought of it before. (I've said it before and I'll say it again: Most designers of sex toys for women don't have the faintest clue how women have sex or masturbate, or even how our basic sexual anatomy works.)

So it's a good idea. So, fine. How well does it work?

Well, first things first: The grooved pad does work. I was a little disappointed when I first saw the toy: for some reason I'd been picturing the bullet being attached to more of a ring, something that'd fit around your finger and keep the vibrator securely attached. (I don't know why I was expecting that: the Good Vibes website is perfectly clear about what this toy is and how it works. I guess I just wasn't paying attention.)

But the grooved pad (it's about the shape you'd get if you pressed your finger into bread dough) does actually work pretty well. After all, you're not dancing a wild jig with the thing ‒ you're pressing it against your clit, and the pressure keeps it in place just fine. I tried it in a few different positions: on my back with my legs spread wide, and on my hands and knees with my face in the pillow and my ass in the air… okay, mostly I tried those two positions. And I had no trouble at all keeping the bullet exactly where I wanted it. A ring would be a more stable design, but this one works quite nicely. And the fingerpad does keep the bone - and joint - shaking to a minimum -- which is a nice bonus.

I was especially impressed with how well the toy stayed in place when I was on my hands and knees. That's one of my favorite sex positions ever… but it's a ridiculously awkward position for keeping a vibrator in place.

It's one of the reasons I've been on such an obsessive quest to find a good hands-free vibrator -- so I could get it from behind with my ass in the air and still have a good vibrator taking care of my clit. And while the Lady Finger isn't quite as convenient as the mythical, non-existent-as-far-as-I-can-tell hands-free vibe would be, it works a damn sight better than most toys I've tried.

Now, when you're shifting around, changing positions or whatnot, you do have to grip onto the bullet itself for a moment. But that's hardly a crisis. When I was actually rubbing it against my clit, I was able to keep it firmly in place with no trouble at all. It's not quite as secure as the Fukuoku fingertip vibrators (the things that actually do fit around your fingertips with little plastic rings)… but it's noticeably stronger.

Which brings me to the next question -- power. After all, if a vibrator's not strong enough to get you off, it doesn't matter how clever or convenient the design is.



As seen at http://www.virtualove.net


So does the Lady Finger have enough oomph to get me where I want to go?

The short answer is yes

The somewhat longer answer is yes… but.

I mean, yes. The Lady Finger got me off. It made me come. Without too much trouble. But it took a little longer than my very favorite vibes, and it didn't make me come nearly as hard. The Pulse-Right, for point of comparison… well, let me quote myself. Here's what I wrote about the Pulse-Right when I reviewed it:

"The first time I tried it, I was actually whimpering and yelping -- something I very rarely do when I'm just buzzing off by myself in my own living room. In fact, the highest setting was almost a little too strong, and that's not something I often say about vibrators. The highest setting was what had me whimpering and wriggling and begging for mercy, and I couldn't keep it set there for more than a few seconds, not until I was right about to come. Just to be perfectly clear -- this isn't a complaint. It's a high compliment. It isn't often that I find myself pleading for mercy from my own vibrator..."

Now, to refresh your memory, here's what I just said about the Lady Finger:

"The Lady Finger got me off. It made me come. Without too much trouble."

That's a big difference.

And the difference is power. The Lady Finger is not at all bad -- it's actually pretty strong for a small battery-op vibrator -- but it doesn't pack quite the same punch as the Pulse-Right. It has an adjustable speed control thingy, but as is so often the case with little battery vibes, I had to crank it straight up to the highest level to even begin to get myself off.

But to be fair, at least some of the difference is simply personal preference. My clit is an insatiably greedy pig for intense, direct sensation, and I tend to prefer a higher-frequency type of vibrator, with a sharper, intensely-focused feel. The Lady Finger has a slower, deeper thrum than the Pulse-Right, less like a high-speed drill and more like a purring engine. That's not quite my cup of tea… but it very well might be yours. And it's pretty quiet, which may be important to you if you have thin walls and nosy roommates/neighbors.

Oh, there's one other downside to the Lady Finger -- an obvious one, probably, but I should mention it anyway. If you want to use your bullet vibrator inside your pussy as well as on your clit, the Lady Finger isn't going to work at all. The grooved finger pad isn't removable, and it's too big and pointy and weirdly-shaped to even think about putting inside you.
That's not a big problem for me -- I'm not that crazy about internal vibrators -- but it might be for you. You have to decide.

All that being said, this is a good and clever design for a sex toy, and one which -- unlike a lot of sex toys -- actually reflects an understanding of how women get off, and responds to a real need that wasn't being met. It probably won't go into my personal selection of favorites, but it might well go into yours. So in other words, if you like bullet-style vibrators, but you find them annoying to hold with your fingers when you use them on your clit or your nipples, this could be a very good toy for you.



You can visit Greta's blog: [extern url='http://gretachristina.typepad.com' target='_blank' text='gretachristina.typepad.com']
or visit her web site:[extern url='http://www.gretachristina.com' target='_blank' text='gretachristina.com']