Reset Password
If you've forgotten your password, you can enter your email address below. An email will then be sent with a link to set up a new password.
Cancel
Reset Link Sent
If the email is registered with our site, you will receive an email with instructions to reset your password. Password reset link sent to:
Check your email and enter the confirmation code:
Don't see the email?
  • Resend Confirmation Link
  • Start Over
Close
If you have any questions, please contact Customer Service
My Magazine > Editors Archive > Sexpert > Getting Women Off
Getting Women Off   by Tera Patrick, with You our Readers

Member Votes

65 votes
142 votes
420 votes
587 votes
4826 votes
Don't like So so Good Very Good Excellent
Members can vote on this response!

Editor Article Search

Text:  

When she first came onto the adult scene, Tera Patrick's film work caught everyone's eye; she was voted the "Best New Starlet" from Cannes to AVN (2001-2). One of the most popular adult stars out there, Tera has captured best-of status at all the hot men's magazines -- Playboy, Penthouse, Hustler -- she was Penthouse's 2002 Pet of the Year and Hustler's 2002 Hustler Honey. The former host of Playboy TV’s Nightcalls 41, for two years in a row, Tera has been the top adult actress on Genesis Magazine's “Porn’s Top 100” list. In addition to all this, Tera runs her own adult production company, "Teravision," while zig-zagging across the country filming and making appearances. In fact, she just appeared with her husband Evan Seinfeld (of the former HBO hit series OZ and Brooklyn-based band Biohazard) on an episode of TLC’s Miami Ink (Tuesday, April 11 -- maybe you've got it on Tivo!). And luckily for AdultFriendFinder, Tera finds time to answer all variety of sex-related questions from our members. (Visit Tera at www.clubtera.com)

* * *


Color or Fantasy?
Dear Tera,
I was watching a rather attractive lady on cam earlier and all was well 'till she brought out this 'toy' to play with. Not only was it much (MUCH) larger than I could ever hope to be it was also a different color. Now I have an issue with the 'Size doesn't matter' when I see this type of thing, but that's not my question here..... When a woman buys a toy does the color matter? Is it a matter of choice? Is a fantasy thing? Should I paint my schlong?....(JK)
scuttlebutt, 40 M


Dear scuttlebutt,
I think color of sextoys is all about preference, of what makes you feel sexy. For instance, I love pink and red toys,.. and specifically jelly based ones... so whether strap on, vibrator, or dong, I hate the fake prosthetic looking fleshtone ones. I'm way more interested however in how hard they vibrate, how soft they are while still being "stiff enough". I also don't like brown, as it looks like a turd. I think the glass ones look best, by phallix, but they don't feel the best to me!
I still prefer a real cock, and a pocket rocket!

xoxo, love




Does a good marriage need sex?
Hi Tera,
I have been married now for six years but we have had sex less than that many times. My wife just seems to think that it's no longer needed. That it was a "dating" thing. I find myself ready to explode sexually sometimes and it has gotten to the point that self satisfaction no longer works. I need a woman's point of few and maybe solutions.
Iwantyou8161, 51 M
Iwantyou8161
Iwantyou8161

Dear Iwantyou8161
Not to burst your already deflated bubble, but each person's needs are their own. If I wasn't getting my needs met in my marriage, I would be single, and shopping. My husband and I are not always sexually in snyc, as horny as I am, he is ridiculously insatiable. If I am tired, I might just give him a blowjob, or let him jerk off on my ass. Sometimes, I send him on a vacation to get it out of his system, oddly enough, he comes back hornier.

xoxo, Love




Woman on top
Dear Tera,
I need some advice on woman-on-top sex. All men love it, but I CAN'T DO IT! I feel over exposed, uncomfortable, like a beached whale, and when I get up there I can't
do anything. I need some advice on how to perform it and get it moving.
SunflowerCurious, 25 F

SunflowerCurious


Sunflower,
There are so many things to try. If you find you cannot get moving on top, try leaning forward, and letting him pump you from the bottom. Another way is to try to stand your feet on the bed, and then squat down on him. To be on your knees for some women, it can be hard to move up and down. I like to put my hands on the man's chest and take a lot of weight off my lower body, sometimes I can move better like that.
Just think no matter how hard it is for you, imagine doing it on camera, and having to be totally conscious about how you look, not just to your man, but to the world! Lol
xoxo, love,



Never had an Orgasm
Hi Tera,
Okay, so I need some help. I have never had an orgasm! I know, I know. I am 26 years old, and never had one. But it's true. I have had lots of partners that say they can make me have one, but of course it doesn't happen. I have had plenty of toys, but they can't do it for me either. Don't get me wrong, sex and toys feel great, but I just have never had an orgasm. Maybe something is wrong with me. I'm not sure. I just know that I have never had one. I love sex, but just don't know what is wrong with me. I have spent so much money on sex toys, its unreal. I love the toys, and they feel so good, but really, what's the point in buying them, if I can't get off from them? Maybe I'm just not buying the right ones. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do to help me bring myself to have an orgasm?
tunicagirl200588, 26 F

Hey girl,

For many women, orgasming from intercourse is virtually impossible. Even clitoral stimulation, which makes me cum all the time, doesn't work for everyone. Have you explored your G-spot? When someone with a very strong hand fingers me with 2 or 3 fingers, and reaches up to my G-spot, I like it slow at first, and then fast and furious. It took me a while, until about 5 years ago to discover this. Well, the fun part is trying many different things. I have to admit, that my hardest earth shuddering orgasms come from brutal anal sex with a vibrator on my clit. I cum so hard it feels like I'm gonna pee!
happy hunting,
xoxo,
Love,



Should I accept the offer?

Dear Tera,
I was recently asked to be with a long time friend & his Wife. I know she likes me & has mentioned it MANY times jokingly. Both my friend & I are in no way going to touch each-other but more or less DP her. I have done this in the past with couples who were not as close of friends & knew it would be no big deal. I have had nothing but FANTASTIC experiences & word of mouth had quite a few couples inviting me "in" so to speak

I want to show her the pleasure of DP but fear hard feelings between them OR them to me. Does friendship withstand 2 on 1? Has anyone had trouble with a CLOSE friend afterward?
SEXYIRC, 33 M
SEXYIRC
SEXYIRC


Dear SEXYIRC,
You can never predict the outcome of people's post-swing feelings. Jealousy is kinda what makes the forbidden fruit so taboo. I think really well defined ground rules are extremely important. Make sure you don't cross any boundaries, and make sure they have lots of quality focus. I'm sure they have invited you for a reason, so just go with it, and make sure to just have a good time. Your relaxed nature will help them both relax. remember, if you make a really big deal out of it, then it IS a really big deal!

xoxo, love,



Being rimmed?
Hi Tera,
I love to have a woman rim me, but some are very reluctant, even though I will have just showered when I ask them. Any thoughts?
thinkblue38, 32 M


Hi thinkblue,
For many women, men wanting to be rimmed crosses the comfort line. As much as I think a man who can explor his body is a huge turnon, I have heard other women say they thought it was borderline homosexual behavior. I think finding the right lovers is all about communication, and chemistry. If that is what you are into, and certain women dont want to, well, maybe they are not the ladies for you. And washing is definitlely a pre-requisite!
xoxo, love,


Shaving question
Dear Tera,
I tried shaving once for a woman I used to date. She loved it and was happy that I did shave, but for me it wasn't so nice. The following days/weeks my skin was irritated.It burned and was almost constantly itchy. My question is, what is a good way to prevent this? I shaved with a new razor and used shaving lotion, but is there something that I missed?
Chitownguy822, 22 M

Hi ChiTownGuy,
Shaving can be equally uncomfortable as it can be painful, and irritated. For a man who shaves around the base of his cock, deep stroking can irritate the hair folicles. I recommend frequent shaving to get your skin accustomed to the friction. Also, you might try not sticking it all the way in, (lol , yeah right)! Having stubble can irritate your partner! Ihave gotten my pussy fucked beyond soreness by my man when he has shaved 2 or 3 days earlier. Maybe we should all go back to the hairy reto-bush? I dont think so. If you are still irritated, try "tendskin", which is great for shaving irritation, as is aloe vera.
xoxo, Love,




For more of Tera's hot advice, check out all her columns in our archives, or Visit Tera at her site, [extern url='http://www.clubtera.com' target='_blank' text='www.clubtera.com'].