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My Magazine > Editors Archive > Sexpert > Swinging: Our First Time
Swinging: Our First Time   by Editors with sixftblonde2

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Here's how sixftblonde2 got started:



AdultFriendFinder: First, could you tell us a little about how you got started? Do you remember when or where you first heard about swinging?

Him: I had my first “soft swing” experience in college, in 1986. There was a group of us that were really close and, typical of many college atmospheres, very exploratory and adventurous. It all started when we told a few of our friends that during a road trip with my friend Dave and his girlfriend, me and my girlfriend were having sex in the back seat, concealed by a blanket. A few weeks later, during another road trip with our other friends, (who were engaged), the female half of the other couple insisted on an instant replay of our previous road trip, but without the blanket (she was quite the voyeur, as you could imagine). “Wow, this is even better than a porn flick”, she said while enjoying a close up view of my girlfriend riding me in the backseat ‒ her fiancé, of course, was doing his best to maintain his concentration while driving. Later in the trip, when it was my turn to drive, and the other couple was in the back seat, my girlfriend insisted that it was HER turn to see a show. Well, things started out sort of slowly, probably a combination of his stage fright and her lack of confidence in her blowjob skills. After a couple of minutes, she looked up at my girlfriend and said to ”I’m not nearly as good at this as you are, I could sure use some help” After a quick glance at me that was returned with an approving nod, she jumped over the seat into the back and started giving him a really nice blowjob. Doing my best to keep my eyes on the road, I found the whole experience incredibly arousing. While this did not progress beyond this simple soft-swap experience, I discovered at this early age the excitement of group sexual encounters.

It wasn’t until four years later, in 1990, that I discovered the “lifestyle”. I was living in Hawaii, with a girlfriend who was very sexually liberated and even more adventurous than my college friends. Of course, this was years before the internet, so the only way to meet local couples was through personal ads in swingers magazines ‒ the kind that were sold in sealed plastic packages in the back section of adult book stores. None of these ads had pictures, and the process of making contact with someone was rather laborious. We found an ad that looked interesting and made contact with the couple. We spoke on the phone (me and the other man only) and agreed to meet on Saturday afternoon at the local polo match. He had described himself as young, tall and athletic ‒ in his late twenties. (I was 24 and she was 22 at the time). We met at the designated spot after the first match, and was greeted by a forty-something, sleazy-looking, really creepy guy. We followed him to his VIP-section seats with his “lady-friend”, who looked older than my mother. While we did our best to be polite and congenial, we excused ourselves at the earliest opportunity, and I haven’t been to a polo match since.

We swore never to try the “blind meeting” route again, and instead focused on advertisements for couples clubs and groups. There was a new couples group forming called “Pacific Velvet”. They featured off-premise social events in private hotel suites. We went to their first meeting, and hit it off with a couple who, in turn, introduced us to a more exclusive, invitation-only, couples group called “The Playhouse”. My first Playhouse party was on my 25th birthday. It was an on-premise event in a Waikiki hotel suite. Cocktails and socializing occurred in the living room area, with playtime in the two bedrooms of the suite. There were about a dozen couples there, mostly in their 20’s and 30’s, and all very outgoing and attractive. My girlfriend and I were fully immersed in the full-swap scene.

For the next year or so, we attended a number of events and private parties, and made some really good friends in the lifestyle. After moving to California a couple of years later, our relationship ended, as did my interest and experience in the lifestyle.

Her: Growing up, there were rumors that a couple in our neighborhood were swingers ‒ I did not understand the appeal and found the concept quite perverse. Prior to marrying my husband, he told me all about his sexual past, including his lifestyle and group experiences. I had previously been in a 5-year relationship with a man who was profoundly insecure and jealous, so this was an absolutely foreign concept to me.

I was uncomfortable and intimidated and made it quite clear to him that I had no interest in that sort of activity. He assured me that this was all in his past, and was something he could do without “been there…done that.”

It wasn’t until a few years later that I started to entertain thoughts about the possibilities. In a way, my husband’s past experiences turned out to be helpful in that I felt comfortable discussing the concept with him. Even so, I could not see myself having emotional-detached sex with another man, though the prospect of being with a woman had some appeal. This was a bit of a departure for me ‒ as a female athlete growing up (and being six feet tall), I was always very conscious of my femininity and had created a bit of a phobia towards lesbianism and bisexuality. The turning point for me probably came when I became very close with a co-worker who was bisexual. During an out of town trip together, I decided to ask her advice and told her about my curiosities. We discussed the pros and cons of having a first experience with a good friend versus a complete stranger. Although we talked about the idea on many occasions, I was still unsure and took no action on the matter.

[To be continued…]



Find out how sixftblonde2's first threesome finally happened, next week in the AdultFriendFinder magazine.



Experienced swingers who'd like to share their "first time" stories, or the fascinating things they've learned while swinging, write a comment below and let us know!