Desperately Seeking Self.....  

your_fave_MRE 44F
142 posts
9/6/2006 7:35 pm

Last Read:
4/20/2007 9:11 pm

Desperately Seeking Self.....

Ok so its been a long time since I have blogged and some of you may even notice old blogs are gone. I had to do this because the whole reason for being on AdultFriendFinder was to have a place that was for ME!! As a mother and a wife and a friend to the world I seem to have misplaced myself and in doing that I had to have a place where I wasnt judged and I could reconnect again. Well, then once husband came on and got a membership I had to get rid of some things because the whole reason for this was that I didnt have to answer to anyone about feelings I had or even feel bad for flirting or even be accused that certain things that I blogged about were things thats happened to me and not stuff I have made up. I don't like the questions I dont like the accusations..All I wanted was a place that was my own and yes strangers could come and peek into my life but I didnt need or want anyone I associated with in my everyday life to find this part of me trying to reconnect. I still havent found my journey I have found I am more lost that I realized. I have never had a chance to be ME or to find out who I really am or what I would really do. I have always been someones daughter, wife, mother but none of these people allowed me to be ME and sometimes when the real me emerged I was quickly made aware that it wasn't appropriate. Thing is for years I had no idea this is what was going on till bout the time I turned 30 when I began taking a look at my life and realizing the real me isnt so bad so why does everyone want me to be something else?? Slowly trying to take over again....or maybe for the first time ever!

bicuriouspair 38M/37F

9/7/2006 8:50 pm

Sorry that you're having problems with identity and self, but I'm happy that you seem to be having some good luck with a job search Hope that you can find a good mental place

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