A Little Dying Never Hurt Anyone...  

wistfuljester 65M
1259 posts
8/4/2006 3:05 am

Last Read:
8/13/2006 1:30 pm

A Little Dying Never Hurt Anyone...

Like the proverbial frog in the pan of water that is gradually heated to boiling, we don't see or feel what is really happening.

Only with us, more often than not we obliviously boil OURSELVES, then wonder why our lives are so empty.

Don't we start out SO enthusiastic, SO optimistic and SO energetic? Weren't we born with an overwhelming desire to love and be loved?

We got hurt; we got told our dreams were foolish; we got betrayed by those we trusted.

At some point, didn't we retreat and tell ourselves that a little dying was a good thing? Didn't we promise ourselves that we were still young, and there was still time to find our dreams?


Desperate need slowly replaced enthusiasm, worry supplanted optimism, and energy became something only found in a battery.

We don't often tell ourselves the whole truth, anymore, because it's just too painful to admit that we live our lives contrary to the values we have held so dear.

Some of us will eventually erupt into a frenetic kind of hedonism, then wonder why we feel even more empty and alone.

Some of us will just trudge on alone, because loneliness seems better than drama.

Many of us will feel so numb and weary that we will welcome death as an overdue release.

When we turn our backs on relationships, moral values and dreams, we die a little more each day. What's the harm? A little dying never hurt anyone, right? Think frog.

No matter how long we live, if we are lucky enough to be allowed to think about our lives as we're dying (and there is certainly no guarantee that we will), the things we daily struggle with are not going to be what matters the most to us about our lives.

It won't be the money we've made, the career goals we've accomplished, or the number of people we've had sex with.

Instead, it will be, "Was I truly honorable? Did I REALLY love anybody? Did anyone REALLY love me?"

AstirRelicLatah 65M
1993 posts
8/4/2006 4:37 am

For me it comes down to do I and did I live my life consistently with my moral compass? Did I surround myself with people who have shared values and live those shared values? Or, did I compromise my values today for a short term gain that left me more empty than when I started? Did I stay true to my life purpose? Or, do I even have a life purpose that I can communicate to myself and others so they have an idea of who I am and what I want......Very nice post...Thanks.

wistfuljester replies on 8/4/2006 5:49 pm:
Thanks for adding your comments.

catkit13 67F

8/4/2006 5:54 pm

very thoughtful post - thanks!

wistfuljester replies on 8/4/2006 8:19 pm:
You're welcome. Thanks for saying so.

QueenofBitches69 47F

8/5/2006 1:53 am

I really liked this post.

wistfuljester replies on 8/5/2006 12:13 pm:
I appreciate your saying so, Mel.

rm_Ellenback 59F
966 posts
8/5/2006 9:18 am

Didn't we promise ourselves that we were still young, and there was still time to find our dreams?

There's always time, WJ, right up to the last second...just my belief!

Some of us will eventually erupt into a frenetic kind of hedonism, then wonder why we feel even more empty and alone.

This is exactly the point I'm at...



wistfuljester replies on 8/5/2006 12:14 pm:
Thanks for your response. I appreciated your insights.

SuzieQ4U60 62F

8/5/2006 6:51 pm


I have felt so much of what you posted here. Hurt, pain, betrayal. I haven't given up.... yet. I almost have. I've thought about it. I have even thought about not wanting to be here anymore and ending it for myself. What kept me from that, was my kids...and also knowing it would have been an entirely selfish act. I made it tho! I made it thru the hell, and pain....... being lonely, but I am still that sometimes....well alot of the time. But, I did make it thru to the other side of devastation. But the feeling of 'if i could just die, i'd not feel any of this anymore' has been in my mind in the past. Don't think that way anymore. No. Just decided to get to know myself and like me first for a change.

I am still a hopeless romantic and will die a hopeless romantic. I have alot of livin to do. Don't want to live it alone, but we shall see. Am open and have been for sometime to find someone to share my life, love and time with. He is out there, I know he is..... Looking for me too. And if I had just given up and died, well, what a waste that would have been. I would have missed so much life has to offer.

Thank you for your thoughts, but thank you even more for sharing them with us all here.



wistfuljester replies on 8/6/2006 3:33 am:
Suz, I'm not quite as "dire" as I may seem. I have not given up hope.

I wish you and I were closer, so at least we could meet and share a beverage and conversation.

I wish you the best in your search, Darlin'!

SuzieQ4U60 62F

8/9/2006 9:56 am


Just saw this and wanted to let you know, I wish we were closer in distance too. Cause I would surely have that coffee with you. Heck, I'd cook for you, dessert included... *wink*


wistfuljester replies on 8/11/2006 6:14 pm:
WOW, a southern home-cooked meal, too?

I think I WUV you...lol!

SuzieQ4U60 62F

8/11/2006 9:59 pm

Silly Wist...

Of course a southern home cooked meal. Now, what would you like?

wistfuljester replies on 8/13/2006 1:31 pm:
Let me think about it for a while...lol.

rm_KarmoHunny 56F
888 posts
8/13/2006 1:44 am

I agree with this post. There are things that are more important than sex (gasp!), money, climbing the corporate ladder and possessions. Too bad many don't realize this.


wistfuljester replies on 8/13/2006 1:31 pm:
Thanks for your comment. It is a shame.

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