Such Passion....  

rm_wigggly 41F
37 posts
9/11/2006 10:40 am

Last Read:
10/30/2006 3:20 pm

Such Passion....


We met at one of my favorite restaurants. It's been awhile since we last spoke. Always friends, nothing more. We were supposed to have a nice dinner with the casualness of catching up on what has been going on in our lives.

I've so missed these forms of communications with others. The connecting.

This time was different however. I could not quite put my finger on it. During dinner...I started noticing things.

His constant hand on the small of my back. The casual rub on my leg. The sparkle in his eyes. I realized...I was engulfed by the smell of his cologne. The smile on his lips. The outline of his jaw.

The simple things. I could see he was hearing all that I was saying. And he was truly interested. The hand on the small of my back was warm...and was sending sensations all over my body.

At one point I realized, I was getting wet. I so wanted him to touch me, rub me, feel me.

He started to massage my back. Right there in the restaurant. I got an orgasm just from the simple touching. Him rubbing and caressing my back...then working his way to my neck. I'm sure I moaned several times.

Then it happened. With one hand still massaging my back...he took the other and moved my hair away from the side of my neck. He leaned in. I could feel his breath on my neck and ear. I should have pulled away right then. But didn't! My knees became weak. If I would have been standing at that moment...I surely would have fallen due to my knees buckling.

I tilted my head back to give him better access... His mouth made contact to my neck. He started kissing, sucking, softly biting. OMG...I came again!

I knew instantly that this is what I have been missing. Thoughts of the past month totally subsided. Me being pregnant, totally out of my mind. Chuck's name...not on my mind or lips.

This was about me. Not giving...only receiving. I so wanted to just give in, let him do to me what he will.

After he paid our bill we went outside. I was faced with the dilemma of having him come back to my place...or going to his. Maybe it was the cold air. But it seemed all reasoning came flooding back to me.

I was not really ready for this. This is my friend.

We stood in the parking lot, me standing up against his Hummer. Trying to decide what to do. I explained that I wasn't really ready to take this to the next level.

Him explaining that this is all he has wanted. For 3 years. Said he never had the balls to approach me on this level before. Reminded me of things we had done, things he had done for me in the past...with the hopes that I would notice HIM. But I never did...not until last night.

He said..."Once you tilted your head back...that was it!" He said he could feel what I if we were one.

He leaned in and kissed me! Such a powerful kiss. I instantly fell back against his Hummer. He pressed his body against mine, and moved in such a way that I was mesmerized. Again his mouth assaulted my neck...and again...I came! His hands worked themselves up my shirt where he started to massage my breasts. OMG...all I could think this really happening?

My mind kept telling me NO, this is wrong. But my body was screaming for more. I have not been touched like this in years. I wanted him so badly...but not like this.

HIs right hand went for my pants, and he started to rub against my wetness. I know he could feel the heat from my multiple orgasms. Then he tried to slide his hands down my pants.

At this point...I broke free from the spell I was under. All reasoning came back...I Can NOT do this. I pulled away and said I had to go.

I quickly hopped in my car and drove off. He called me within minutes of my departure. He said he was so sorry. Said he just lost himself in me. Told me how he had played things in his mind. Said he wasn't sure when it started...the pretending that we were a couple. He said it was sometime during dinner. Told me more in depth of how he has always thought of me.

The conversation got so intense that I had to pull over. How can someone know so much about me? My favorite favorite different sounds of laughter and what they really mean? The smirk I get on my face, when I'm up to no good? The things that I've done for others, that I did but never gave a second thought to? Things that I myself had forgotten?

After we hung up...I sat in K-Mart's parking lot for awhile. Trying to digest all that I had heard. The total amazement, the shock of what had all transpired.

I felt as though I, that my body, had betrayed another. How can someone rile up so many emotions when I'm in love with someone else? SOmeone else who is so undeserving? SOmeone else, who's Baby I am carrying? Someone else...who is never around? Someone else who has never been there for me? Someone else who made it a point to go out on me and lie about it? Someone else who has his priorities so fucked up? Someone else whom....I'm not seeing anymore?

How can something that felt so good make me feel so bad?

I managed to make it home. Popped Schindler's List in and started to watch it. My thoughts kept coming back to dinner. I could still feel his mouth on my neck...the constant sucking and soft biting.

MMMMMMMMM...what a peaceful sleep.

For once...Chuck was not the last thought on my mind. His name was not the last word to escape my lips before I drifted off to sleep.

rm_Fun4u2937 47M
94 posts
9/11/2006 10:58 am need to have dinner with this guy again. You both have sexual tension to release. If you don' will have chuck on your mind...while dinner with that guy will be in your heart.

Sometimes you need to think less and simply react.

Tarzan1271 51M

9/12/2006 3:03 pm

You have to be free to give yourself completly to someone else. It doesn't sound like your free yet. If your heart doesn't belong to you, how can you give it to another?
Also, while the guy you had with dinner sounds good, sometimes after the challange of the chase is gone. People get bored and move along.
After almost forty years of life I've learned alot, only to realize I don't know squat. Don't follow your heart, or listen to your brain, it's amazeing any of us are sane.

horny4ucumsee 52M

9/20/2006 1:35 pm

tonya, just by the sheer volume u have written i can only imagine what is bouncing around inside your head! while i'll admit i didn't read every word of your writings i have a sneaking suspicion you need to find some separation somehow (lord knows easier said than done). coming from a man that always hung on way too long to the point of bad choices/decisions. hang in there if u need to chat i'm a great listener and would be happy to help any way i can. terry

actinghonestly 41F
6 posts
10/25/2006 12:56 pm

Can I have this guys number?

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