Closure = Making sure the door is slammed shut behind you!  

rm_wigggly 41F
37 posts
8/19/2006 9:10 pm

Last Read:
2/2/2013 12:31 am

Closure = Making sure the door is slammed shut behind you!

Here is the actual Conversation that me and....the person I will refer to as SPERM DONOR...had tonight! Yes...I'm very sad over everything that has happened! I actually love this person immensely....but he has made it very easy for me to hate him! Would love some comments...AM I being wrong here????? And OH yes...he is also a fellow AdultFriendFinder'er!

Chuck: just no reply
ME: huh?
Chuck: this level playing field - kat im'ng me and calling me a dick - the last two im's from you
ME: I had nothing to do with kat
ME: Block her
ME: I haven't even chatted with her
ME: and the level playing field is exactly how I feel
ME: it's never been level
ME: and it still isn't
ME: I feel like I'm pulling teeth to try and talk with you
ME: I don't know why I feel this way.....
ME: I sure as hell am not getting any encouragement
Chuck: for thye next four or five weeks, i work non fucking stop
ME: and that's my fault?
ME: is it really fair to take THAT out on me?
Chuck: and how am i taking it out on you?
ME: by being short and cross...and not communicating jack crap about anything
ME: fucked up thing is that I know if someone emails WILL make the time to meet them
ME: I guess it just hurts is all
Chuck: i'm tired tonya - sore = short and cross
Chuck: add the baby thing
ME: Chuck...the Baby thing took 2
Chuck: i'm sorry it hurts, the only way i can make it feel better, i don't think will work
Chuck: I get stressed with my existing problems
ME: and what is the way you think would make you feel better?
Chuck: move to an island and sell coconuts
ME: LOL> waht you are saying is yes Tonya I'm an asshole out looking for a piece of ass...and I don't really care how you feel about it
ME: Did you really care that little?
Chuck: no tonya - i really do care, i really do - and why am i looking for a piece of ass?
Chuck: you know - a big part of me thinks it'll be a long time before any relationship
ME: I get the hint
Chuck: i don't speak in code
ME: I barely speak at all
ME: but what I'm seeing right now...there is....
ME: not a chance between you and I
ME: regardless of what happens
ME: You have basically generalized everything
Chuck: Tonya - I cannot take on any more obligations - i cannot handle what i have now
Chuck: You know/knew that
Chuck: i don't see that as generalized
ME: No...what i see is someone who runs from anything
ME: I am not an obligation Chuck
ME: My children were NEVER and obligation
ME: we could have been a team...
ME: that is what relationships are all about
ME: you are so self-centered that you don't even see that
Chuck: i do see it - i really do
Chuck: but at the same time - i will not RUN into a burning building
Chuck: you have this deep desire to have a child, the hell with anything else, you'll figure it out
ME: so now I'm a burning building....LOL
Chuck: i CANNNOT do that
ME: Chuck you knew that before we even started dating.....
ME: I did NOT plan this
ME: is what came...and now I have to deal with it
ME: I guess my biggest problem now is that I hoped you would come around.....
ME: I see it will never happen
ME: and I'm not really asking for you too......I just need to know that you won't
ME: I ahve to know for sure
ME: so I can move on
ME: it hurts not being with you...and I don't know why
Chuck: tonya - you are one of the most giving people i've ever meet
Chuck: but i am in deep financial problems, and as busy as i am, it isn't getting better
ME: but will get better
Chuck: it would be wrong of me to make commitments to others that i can't keep
ME: and I'm willing to stick it out with you
ME: Chuck...the only committment I want is in a partner....
ME: respect
ME: love
ME: even if in the end you went bankrupt...we would be OK
ME: Money isn't everything
Chuck: you have a rosey outlook on things, but not realistic
ME: is very realistic
ME: stop being so narrow minded
ME: LOL..I menat Chuck
ME: meant even
ME: is almost as if you look down on me because I prefe the simple things
Chuck: look around you - i don't want to live like that - not to be shallow
Chuck: i don't look down on you - but i need more than the simple things - to each their own
ME: why couldn't you have just left me alone in the first place then
ME: I was better off
ME: you were obviously better off also
ME: THank you
Chuck: Tonya, this is the hardest thing ever for me
ME: I highly doubt that Chuck
ME: but you are definitely making this easier for me
ME: I will not contact you again....
ME: I will however keep your family up-dated on the progress
ME: I will send you and them photos as well
ME: I don't want anything from you
Chuck: You know - MY life is my life - it doesn't involve anyone but me
ME: really?
ME: hrmmmm
ME: it now involves an innocent child who should not be punished because his/her father is an asshole
ME: you can have YOUR life....I really don't think I was taht big of a part in it in the first place
ME: and for that I'm truly Sorry
ME: But I WILL not be the bad person here
ME: this child will know exactly what happened
ME: but I'm sure by then...when that time comes....things will be different
ME: this child WILL see and get all the love it needs
ME: I do not want your Money.....
ME: I do not want marriage
ME: I don't want jack crap from you
ME: BUT I will be damned if I kept it's heritage from it
ME: my mother was adopted...I know what it is like to go through
ME: I've already spoken to one of your sisters about this
ME: go ahead and HATE me...I honestly don't give a fuck!
ME: this child will not be denied
ME: I'm not asking for anything from any of you.....
ME: but....You can NOT make the decision for them as to whether or not they should know if they have a grandson....cousin
ME: that is NOT your choice
Chuck: Hold your head high and mighty - I let you in my home and you stuck your nose in every crack
ME: excuse me?
Chuck: Throw darts all you want - I wasn't the one that started the EVIL shit
ME: I stuck my nose in every crack? are fucking joking
ME: are being self centered agian
ME: Your sister gave me her number when we were in Ohio
Chuck: I am making a decision that i feel is correct - You choose to have a child under durress
ME: are the one under duress
Chuck: You are too, in my eyes
ME: The thing that I am happiest about is that I DON"T need you...I NEVER needed you...I only wanted you....
ME: Chuck..this is not being selfcentered by any means
ME: this is not about me...this is not about you
Chuck: It is in my eyes
ME: Go figure
ME: well...I've had enough of this BS
ME: again...
ME: Thank you for making this extremely easy for me
ME: I wish I could say I hope you fail in all you do...but that wouldn't be true
ME: But yeah...LOL...I hope you catch something...and that your pecker does fall off

rm_Thanatos1369 45M

8/20/2006 3:09 pm

Wigggly, I think you'll probably get a lot of replies on this one, and I am completely surprised I am the first to reply to it. What he did was wrong, and now he fails to admit to it. Whenever you need someone to talk to, I will always be an IM away. You know how much I care about you.


bigloadwaiting 48M
2 posts
8/21/2006 6:01 pm

hes a dick

rm_rebelfourfun 45M

8/22/2006 9:24 am

Wow, you have great passion. You don't need a guy like him.

royaloakian 58M  
158 posts
8/26/2006 7:40 am

This Chuck guy is a total asshole..there is no nice way to say it & I'm not going to candy coated. He procreated a life and just wants to walk away. What a sad, pathetic,little man..and i'm using the word man loosely here. Hunny-you deserve sooooooo much better, & like brother Than said, I'm an IM away hun...always.
Consoling Huggzz, Royal

actinghonestly 41F
6 posts
8/28/2006 4:02 pm

As much as I hate to admit it, due to our personal circumstances, you seem like a level headed woman. I wish you the best in whatever you choose here. Hopefully, you will not waste another moment of your time on this asshole.
Hell, he was trying to hook up with me when you two were dating. Who knows if you were serious or not. But considering you are pregnant now...I would say you were probably very serious. Once a snake always a snake.
As for Troy...girl forget about it. I know now that you never even knew about me. I also know now that he was seeing you long before me. Go figure...seems the two of us are in the same situation sort of. I finally got rid of him, for how long....only time will tell.

Anyways, lets let bygones be bygones. Chickies need to stand together. If you ever want or need someone to talk to, I'll be here!

rm_kimmiqti539 53F
1 post
8/28/2006 11:53 pm

I hate to say it...but sounds like too many men that I ex included!! Certain men have no concept at all what bringing a child into this world means, and until we actually do..guess we dont either! But the first time you hold that baby, and look into its eyes, your in love for life!!! This man sounds like a totally idiot and your not wrong in any sort of way!! Sounds as though he is selfish and self-absorbed and any women who would even THINK about hooking up with this guy better think about you and the position you are in right now. And Im with you sweetie, hope his pecker shrivles up and falls off...then what will he have to offer ANYONE!!! Not a damn thing!! Good luck to you!!

rm_Thanatos1369 45M

9/11/2006 10:30 am

It is pretty sad that such an asshole has to get a gal like yourself into a situation like this, but I just wanted to let you know that not all guys are like him. I am sure you'll find the right man for you, and always keep your chin up, because there are a lot of people on your side. Smiles and warm hugs from the resident vampire.


rm_Thanatos1369 45M

9/15/2006 11:18 pm


Of all things I value the most between us, it is our friendship. I hate to see you hurting in any way, and you know that I am only an IM away if you need someone to talk to. The only advice I can really give you at this point is to focus on that proverbial silver lining to this dark cloud. If you look hard enough, you will find it, I am sure. For instance, though he was a complete dick and asshole to you, the best thing about it is the life that is growing within you. I know you will always have a hard time making the right decisions in life, but you can only take one step at a time.


rm__1BADAZZ_ 60M
2906 posts
10/23/2006 7:52 pm

Yes his attitude and stance on this is all wrong no doubt, but it does take two to tango...can you say child support? anyway it seems to me he was looking for only one thing from you and he got what he wanted and now he tosses you and your unborn fetus to the side just as he most likey has many other women...Well this situation is truly no single persons fault. You my dear wigggly are just as much resposible for this as he is, better take some personal inventory and make some better choices in the future. I hope the baby is healthy and your life takes a path that makes you content and happy.

slickydick696 54M

11/6/2006 7:33 pm

Sorry to read of your troubles. Chuck is obviously an asshole. He is clearly pushing all responsibility for the child on you ... saying it is your choice. That is bullshit! He got you pregnant! Since when can a guy insist on an abortion and then absolve himself of responsibility if you don’t want one. I know you are not asking him for money, but he is not necessarily getting away from any financial responsibility by treating you like this. You have every legal right to seek child support.

Please don't think all guys are such shmucks.

Become a member to create a blog