someone stop me  

wickedeasy 68F  
17272 posts
7/31/2006 2:05 pm
someone stop me


okay - i just can't seem to stop thinking today -
my mind is going so fast i'm worried i'll never catch up to it

here's a thought:

remember Elaine in Seinfeld - choosing who was sponge worthy? well, i think i do that too. not with sex - but with friendship. i think i make decisions on whether to allow a new person into my life based on arbitrary factors.

i wonder how many truly amazing people i have missed knowing

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


AstirRelicLatah 66M
1993 posts
7/31/2006 2:19 pm

I think there's two ways to look at this. First, probably a lot. Second, to have quality relationships you have to edit and do the best you can at choosing. I believe there are hundreds if not thousands of people who can such tremendous value to our lives. If we miss one or two, that's too bad, but when the time comes a teacher always arrives. BTW, it looks like you turned off your profile. If you would send me your email I would like to trade my off line email with you. If not, that's OK too.


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:03 pm:
grins at the first way to look at it.

i agree, one edits, or thinks do i have enough time, or does that person feed me in a way that i need to be fed

still..........i wonder

sending you an email

Panthiest 74M

7/31/2006 4:53 pm

I don't worry about it too much - at least as to who is and who is not because I am a natural filtering process. Perhaps we all are. 90% of the people I meet, I assume as possible friends and I let my "life" filter them in or out. I have a characteristic of not hiding my feelings which filters out folks who are upset by any real emotion no matter how small. I have had people try and tell me I should always say nice things on a first date. I should never cross the boss, etc etc etc. I understand why people would do these thngs, but I don't seem to be able to. But I have learned not to be attached to emotions. I enjoy them and I realize emotions have a purpose of shutting off the mind, but they are temporal - they will pass. I don't make important decisions when emotional. See? I don't squash them and I'm not attached. If I let them pass they don't build much power and they fade. People who move through the filters easily seem to be able to understand this, allow it or they might say, "How are you feeling?" of "Pipe down." the ones who have a hard time generally try to ignore everything, making everything uncomfortable and they retreat back to what they already know.

As a result, I don't have many "Good, deep, friends" but the ones I have, while they may have travelled different paths than I, are my brothers and sisters born of the same God(s). We listen to each other's stories and ideas, the point not being to agree, so as to build their confidence or little alters for the ego, but to react and feel our reactions. To feel our subtle energy moving around and between us. To me, that's life. Good friends make me feel alive.

But I do have a few arbitrary filters. Vampire people who can only center on themselves. Marshmellow people who always agree and you (and likely they) never know where they really are. I suppose there are others but most are subsidiaries of these people.

Intersting question makes for interesting thoughts. Thanks!


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:07 pm:
now i think i'll spend some time on the idea of filtering emotions and their temporal nature

part of me, as an emotional being wants to get all uppity - grins

gimme some time to think on this - i agree on the censoring piece but i also know how not cnesoring can be extraordinarily painful for those who take each word as gospel

Mermaidslut 51F

7/31/2006 5:18 pm

Depends on what you consider friendship...

I am always willing to reach out to someone and give them a chance. A good friend of mines mother, who runs a homeless shelter, taught me the best lesson ever. She was always willing to give everyone hugs, and you should have seen some of the big men she made cry with such a simple gesture.

But, when someone is hurtful then you have to draw the line somewhere.
I have learned to pull away from people who are only takers in life.


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:08 pm:
i run shelters too - and there is nothing more powerful than a hug sometimes. especially to someone who is rarely even "seen"

rm_shannee2006 53F
3355 posts
7/31/2006 8:34 pm

Am I sponge worthy? LOL

Yup...this juiciness is from me....

S


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:09 pm:
covers Shannee in sponges

like you need to ask???

MamChelle 49F
1443 posts
7/31/2006 9:47 pm

Maybe it is like me with and the love thingy...it just takes a special touch, word or something to open you up to the idea of getting to know another.... it has taken a lot of years for me to learn that i just might be worth being loved.... just might is as far as i can admit to though. *hugs and smiles* tc


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:10 pm:
grrrr Chelle - you are eminently sponge worthy -

in time, all things in their time

psssssst - i've missed you

M

rm_gerson42 53M
2419 posts
7/31/2006 11:08 pm

Damn, I go away for 3 frickin days and have 13 of your posts to catch up on. That is simply not right. lol. On a serious note, in my experience... giving a person a chance to prove or disprove themselves as opposed to arbitrary removal based on first glance, etc.... simply extends the amount of people within the friends network. Most people, at their core, are good people. Just my opinion.
ger


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:12 pm:
gee ger

did you go away? blinks

i think i think that too - but that doesn't mean they get past the front door, yanno?

glad to know you only hurt yourself a little bit......

somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
8/1/2006 4:24 am

My time is limited, but not nearly as limited as my arbitrary spongeable ability to arbitrarily fuck it up.


somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
8/1/2006 4:29 am

If you don't stop thinking you may soon get to a place where you can't do anything else.


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:12 pm:
that's my plan

FrankPicasso 53M

8/1/2006 5:52 am

My mind is going so fast i'm worried i'll never catch up to it

Just follow behind as closely as you can. Then, once your mind falls asleep, pounce on it!


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:13 pm:


brilliant -

sssssh, quiet, i think she's about to doze..............

libgemOH 57M/53F

8/1/2006 2:38 pm

I call those my washing machine days...when my brain just keeps going around and around and around and around and.....

and I am that way too. I know for a fact that I miss out on a lot of amazing lessons and amazing people. fear...... -B


wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:15 pm:
i like that - washing machine days - cool

fear - god i hope it isn't just that - that would piss me off
but it's for sure in the mix

hugs (maybe someday i'll learn how to use those smiley things)

Panthiest 74M

8/2/2006 12:41 am

wickedeasy replies on 8/1/2006 5:07 pm:
now i think i'll spend some time on the idea of filtering emotions and their temporal nature

part of me, as an emotional being wants to get all uppity - grins

gimme some time to think on this - i agree on the censoring piece but i also know how not cnesoring can be extraordinarily painful for those who take each word as gospel...

Wicked, the idea (or my convoluted version) is NOT to filter the emotions but enjoy them and let them go. And get uppity as you want. Just don't take it too seriously ir I might believe you. Ha!

Now what's that about censoring, not censoring?


wickedeasy replies on 8/4/2006 6:07 am:
i tend to be like you - just out there and exposed. generally i think that censoring my emotions is counter productive (it is definitely counterintuitive for me)

but and it's a big but

there are people who find this difficult and threatening and so there are times, no? when a little censoring leads to a better eventual outcome?

somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
8/2/2006 3:20 am

Who will take care of the world after I'm gone? Who will pimp the moon and synchronicity?


wickedeasy replies on 8/4/2006 6:08 am:
lordylordy - no guilt trips please - you can have your big purple hat back

rm_shannee2006 53F
3355 posts
8/3/2006 7:05 am

Peeking out from behind the sponges...Wow! Thanks WE! Glad I'm worthy. LOL!

Yup...this juiciness is from me....

S


wickedeasy replies on 8/4/2006 6:09 am:

MOfunNOWWOW 56F

8/3/2006 9:30 am

You are def sponge worthy but are you master of your domain
not me he he he


MOMO
just a squirrel trying to get a nut


wickedeasy replies on 8/4/2006 6:10 am:
master of my domain?



somedays i wonder if i'm even employed by my domain

somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
8/4/2006 11:26 am

My, how you've changed since I've changed.


wickedeasy replies on 8/5/2006 1:05 pm:
grins - funny how that happens

ButteryDelight 59F

8/4/2006 12:43 pm

I wonder how many people I've missed knowing that I didn't have the courage to reach out to and say..hey! email me or I'm me.

I'm thankful I met you tho.

Buttery Delight


wickedeasy replies on 8/5/2006 1:06 pm:
me too you BD

IM me anytime sis - the architect has my yahell -

tight hugs

Panthiest 74M

8/4/2006 5:37 pm

"i tend to be like you - just out there and exposed. generally i think that censoring my emotions is counter productive (it is definitely counterintuitive for me)

but and it's a big but

there are people who find this difficult and threatening and so there are times, no? when a little censoring leads to a better eventual outcome?"

I agree on the first part with a smile on my face and a song in my heart...Tra-la!

the second part I er, ug, grunt, puff, puff, nnnnmmmnnn, agree but I don't want to. But you are right, just because I'm able to express my feelings and not be attached to them (sometimes) doesn't mean the "other" feels the same way at the same time. Yet I really dislike having to "walk on eggshells" because the "other' might be upset by me being up front and honest - at least about my feelings.
Maybe I need to meditate a while longer on Compassion.

Nice dialoging with you.


wickedeasy replies on 8/5/2006 1:06 pm:
and with you

what type of meditation do you do?

Panthiest 74M

8/5/2006 4:38 pm

Nothing formal anymore...well once in a while I do breathing -count three out, count three in; count four out, count four in etc. To calm the energy hold the breath between the in/out for a count of 3, then 4 then 5 etc.

Sometimes I can get in a meditative frame of mind by walking and sometimes riding my bike where I don't have to worry about traffic. Sex with the right person can clear the mind too. I'm not good at sitting -but perhaps with practice.

How about you? What's your practice?


wickedeasy replies on 8/7/2006 10:26 am:
i practice insight meditation and following hte breath is part of it but mostly it is becoming still and open to receive whatever you need to receive. i began over 34 years ago - i'm hoping someday i get good at it

i often do group walking meditations at dawn - it's a lovely way to welcome the day and to feel connected

namaste

somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
8/5/2006 8:19 pm

Some people were meant for each other ... others should at all costs be prevented from ever meeting.


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