infinitesimal idiosyncrasies  

whineyblonde0r 54F
287 posts
6/5/2006 5:44 am
infinitesimal idiosyncrasies

I'm wondering about the small things in life right now. No major complications going on in my little world currently so gotta ponder things I usually take for granted...
Quirky People...There was a local man, he had never married and lived on a farm. The animals assumably were his only close companions town he came one day..pulling into the gas station, he hauls out a blow up doll. Needing a patch on it, he does the one thing he knows will fix it..Tire patch! Does he think eyebrows will be raised nor giggled whispers might be exchanged by the odd mixture of men who frequent the establishment....nooo...he isn't ashamed to cart the deflated ruby red lipped companion into the auto bay. For all his non-embarrassment he gets told..."Get that fucking thing outta my shop you pervert." I wasn't there and was only retold this story, but i can see the dejected downward stare to the ground as he toted his lifeless girlfriend slung over one arm back to his truck. It wasn't a big deal to him obviously, but worthy of many laughs and stories that generations to come will hear.Moral... To go forth without hesitation in your pursuits to find happiness.

Possessions....I knew a person who saved everything. To him it was normal, someday he would need it and when asked would normally find the desired object to fix or use for anything. It cluttered his life..overwhelmed his companion and filled a storage shed to the brim. Attempts at sorting the acquisitions were futile and meager amounts were occasionally thrown out. Invitations to add to a garage sale were delayed and he keep all his precious booty safe from the dickering ways of old ladies pawing thru his lifetime of treasures. He died one day. The precious cargo collected thrown in a garbage pile to be covered by earth as decomposing as his body was now. Meaningless to anyone but himself. We all die eventually and don't take anything but our soul with us on the final journey. Moral..Life is too short to acquire more than friends who mourn us and children who carry on our teachings. And..if you leave this earth with but one person who will shed a tear whenever they think of you...let it be of happy thoughts, not ones cluttered with "stuff"

Morals.....Being raised in a Christian environment and not having went to church regularly in years. I still have a basic ideal of morality. I want life to proceed with a certain fairness to it and live a fairly good life, trying to not hurt as I don't want to be hurt. My little quirk....hypocritical while being hypocritical occasionally myself? I was told recently that since I am not fully legally D-i-v-o-r-c-e-d ! technically that I am a "cheater". This conversation came about when I stated I didn't like blatant cheating on another person without them being fully informed that it was an open arrangement. um..ok..One should then fully dissect the whole issue and forget? that when one pledges til death do you part. A divorce technically doesn't erase the vow? That is not a solid stance I take,nor belief I have, but took it in debating the accusation that I was a cheater, albeit a separated cheater. The particular accuser was divorced and I found that his stance was object-able on that grounds..All I got in response was.."its not the same thing"..hmmm..really? Moral...To make rules that only you can follow seem fair to only yourself, and to others..possibly they seem like a convenient excuse to plow thru life and over other ways of thinking in a scheme to justify your behavior and disallow all others.. I stand accused also...

Wow, so many more little things to think about but, I think Id loose many reading this just because of the length of this blog..So I stop...

GuyWhoListens2u 57M
325 posts
6/7/2006 7:55 am


Really great topics.

It is interesting that the source of marriage (the Old Testament) also sets up divorce to last about 20 seconds. I feel many of the "problems" we face amid a divorce would never occur if the states and judges would quit trying to play marriage counselor.

Another thing that bothers me is a judge ordering visitation with a known child abuser or forcing contact between and abusive mate and the victim. It seems that they aren't aware (even after supposedly reading documentation) that there was a reason for the separation.

whineyblonde0r 54F
140 posts
6/7/2006 1:54 pm

I fortunately have a workable relationship with my "ex", He always arrives late to pick our daughter up, and brings her home early. No quibbles about that cause I know it will happen. He doesnt worry If I have plans and suddenly his visit is cancelled cause he "has things to do" I know it will happen more than occasionally. Easy relationship when I know how to keep my mouth shut. Just like the marriage.. Abusers and visitations, little knowledge to that subject other than...I stand behind anyone who sets out to be a responsible adult and care for their children in a manner that promotes healthy capable children who grow into healthy adults despite the maybe rocky start to their lives. I dont encourage anyone making a child see a parent they dont feel comfortable around, but hopefully the responsible parent enables them to learn coping skills.? And I grimace as I state this cause it is never that easy it...? Children develop so many insecurites when they see "violence" within their parents relationship. I do think that they grow up accepting of that behavior within their own. My childhood was filled with no striff, loving parents and a very satsifactory existance. It did set a pattern that I see in myself of not wanting to fight. Disliking striff and..damn it...kisses and snuggles and hugging and kissing all the time like my parents did..Being the center of a universe yet also being part of the whole...
Hopefully...if this is the situation you live works itself out and visitations are supervised for your children.

rm_Mrnonooky 58M

6/10/2006 9:34 pm

Bravo Whiney Blonde, bravo;
Especially on the part about the Morals. Interesting in that the person who accused you of cheating because your divorce isn't completed is personally divorced as well, and excempts himself/herself from such judgement.

If such a person presents themself as either Christian or Jewish, you can refer them to Deuteronomy 24:1

Only two things have to take place in a Biblical time divorce.
1, Give the spouse a bill of divorcement, (equivlent to today's filing for divorce),
2, Getting the spouse out of your residence.
The verse itself seems to imply that the woman must always leave, but in the origional written language it was neither gender specificly.
Simply assumed that the woman would leave because in that culture men owned the land, and women generally did not. Very minor tangent.
The other very minor tangent is the reason. Your more devout hypocrites will be very quick to say, "divorce for adultry only."
But that's not the point of the issue. It's clearly a sidestep.
The point is that divorce was designed to be quick and simple.
The reason (to their dismay) is not relevent.

The ONLY reason divorce isn't that quick and simple today is so that attorneys can make more money dragging it out, fighting about property division, child custody, support, visitation, and all the issues that a fair judge could resolve in less then an hour if he wanted to bad enough.

If nothing else, look it up for yourself, and feel comforted knowing you are not wrong, the other person is.
I personally am taking it so far as to openly say that any woman who thinks I'm not good enough for her during my separation, won't be good enough for me when the divorce is final. I don't want to be with somebody so narrow. That was my problem to begin with.

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