The Art of Agony... Part 2  

travelingintexas 42M
posts
3/30/2006 12:14 am
The Art of Agony... Part 2


I know I have provided a lot of written material this week that is beyond what I normally do. I also see that many of you have become silent in comments and I take this to mean it is too much and not exactly what you want to read here. Which is ok. So this will be the last post of this kind for a while. I wanted to finish the Aelia and Blackcrawler story for those of you that were truly interested and then get back to normal. The first part of this can be found at Art of Agony.
________________________________________________
Neither prey nor predator seemed to move or breathe. To do so would trigger action and action was the last thing Aelia wanted at this moment. She stood rooted to the floor, bare feet hard and planted against bare, smooth stone. She knew she was trapped between the Blackcrawler and the door. There was no way she could get past. They were too fast, too strong and any attempt at escape that way would prove futile. The random thought of jumping from her balcony flashed across her mind, yet she knew she would certainly never survive a fall from that height.

Rescue was out of the question. At this time of night, once she was done with her evening ritual of getting ready for bed, the chamber maid would leave her after dimming her lights and she would attempt sleep. She was never bothered in the evenings, so there was no hope or chance of rescue from that direction. The sudden realization that she had no realistic options tore through her and she knew fear and apprehension unlike any she had known before. She knew now that she was destined to die an excruciating death in the next few moments and the realization of that dread alone was enough to almost undo her there were she stood.

For all of his movement, the Blackcrawler could very well have been a stone statue. This was part of the game she knew. Allow and instill the prey with boundless fear, even before the Blackcrawler began its art of agony. Blackcrawlers feed on fear and agony; it feeds them as meat feeds a dog. Even now it watched her through her aura of fear rather than natural sight. All these things she knew but none helped her situation and she could no longer just stand here. Her inaction was paralyzing her and if anything she was a fighter, stubborn beyond her mother and fathers understanding, and to give in now was not in her nature. Gathering her courage and slowly inhaling a deep breath, she knew she had only one useless opportunity to try and break for the door to her chambers. Futile maybe, yet it was all she had.

Without a glance and with no warning whatsoever, or so she thought, she broke for the closed door. She had made it maybe four steps before she felt herself powerfully and roughly lifted into the air and then suddenly and forcefully slammed into the wall of her chamber. The breath of air she had just inhaled was blown explosively from her lungs. She knew amazing pain as an ornamental wall fixture, protruding from the wall behind her, dug deeply into her back, causing her to cry out in pain and her sight was now blurry with dark edges and she realized she was near to passing out.

Unconsciously, she still attempted to run but she quickly realized her feet were not on the ground. As her vision began to clear she also noticed the rough hands that held her there pinned with her feet in the air and against the rough surface of the wall. The Blackcrawlers fingers were tipped with razor sharp nails. As she uselessly attempted to free herself from his grasp she desperately looked down and noticed a painful and red splotch beginning to form where the Blackcrawlers thumb painfully bit into her breast, the rest of his hand grasped around her side and under her arm. Digging mercilessly into skin, it held her there. Its face was a miasma of shrunken and folded skin, reptilian in its roughness, yet human in a broken, grotesque way. A crooked smile broke across its face as its dead, voided eyes gazed at her with animalistic lust. There were no pupils, just a grey murky mass where normal eyes should have been. However, in that moment, its grin was even more terrifying.

The Blackcrawler was immensely powerful. Again, the silent game resumed, Aelia pinned in the air between the wall and the body of the Blackcrawler, held forcefully under the arm with one huge and powerful hand. The only movement the Blackcrawler now made was the increasing pressure of his razor like finger pressing into her left breast, the blood staining her white shift. This was the dance of death and surprisingly neither had made a noise yet. She was too scared to make a sound. No one could get to her quick enough and she refused to call down any more pain upon herself and risk angering the Blackcrawler even more, although she knew death was nigh. As she hung there she watched in horrid fascination as the Blackcrawler raised its other arm and in a languid movement both powerful and gentle, slowly dipped its finger into the pooling blood on her shift. Aelia watched in disgust and horror as the Blackcrawler brought its blood tipped finger to its gnarled mouth and the tip of a tongue protruded and darted between cracked and broken lips, tasting the sweetness of her blood. As it did, its eyelids fluttered in eagerness and rapture and a broken croon quietly sang from its lips, the only sound it had yet to make. Its entire demeanor changed in that moment. Where once a monster had stood statuesque with no wasted movements, now this broken and grotesque being became animated and excited as the fresh fragrance of her blood ran over its swollen tongue. It had tasted the blood of kings and nothing would be able to save her from its bloodlust. Despair washed over Aelia as she attempted to undo herself from the grasp of this creature. The pain returned as her movements forced new layers of her flesh to be sliced as she moved against that horrid hand.
She had tried not to scream, had made her best effort, but the yell that broke her lips at that moment grated pleasantly over the ears of the Blackcrawler and throughout the room. This gesture only excited the creature more as it fed from her anxiety and fear, gaining confidence in its victory. She continued to scream as the Blackcrawlers finger began to dig deeply and terrifyingly slowly into the soft flesh of her breast and moved in an agonizing circle. It excitedly brought its free hand up and dangled its razor-sharp claws in front of her face, lazily showing her the tools of its trade. It extended its forefinger and lightly placed it upon her chin and her screams immediately dried up. Her throat suddenly dry and ragged, she whimpered and suppressed a broken sob. Applying pressure slowly, it drew its finger from her chin and then slowly down her neck pausing as it came to rest upon the top of her breastbone. As she watched in paralyzed fascination, it gradually straightened its finger. Suddenly with clarity, she knew the hand had become a working tool, and she felt the pressure begin to build upon her chest from the beasts pointed finger.

Slowly, agonizingly slowly, it inserted its finger into her skin. Cutting through and surgically piercing smooth flesh, it drilled deeper until she could feel the tip rasp angrily against bone. It was then she new the Blackcrawlers intention.

Watching through tear streaked eyes; she felt the slow, torturous pull of its finger down the middle of her breastbone. Her body being sliced open and the sharpened nails never leaving the bone as the Blackcrawler traced a long torturous line slowly and methodically down her chest. She knew not how long it had cut her; she just knew she felt every piece of her flesh being torn open with the greatest precision and ease.

Wetness dripped down her stomach as she bled beneath the loose shift. She screamed again as the Blackcrawler removed its finger roughly from her torn flesh. Her eyes flew open and she watched, hypnotized with incalculable fear, as the front of her shift was sliced completely open using only that blood stained finger. Bare now, her shift a gaping torn cloth held in place because of her arms, she knew complete humiliation beyond her pain as she was exposed. Looking down in desperation, her eyes followed the burning line that had been branded deep within her skin and the taste of bile rose up within her throat. Her pleading eyes flew back to the face of the Blackcrawler, unable to do anything now but watch. The lips were still set in that crooked and ghastly grin, yet its tongue ran hungrily over them now. Without warning, the Blackcrawlers head flew forward to her chest.

She hung suspended and crushed against the textured stone wall, the pain in her left breast all but forgotten as she watched in horrid fascination the back of the Blackcrawlers head.
She felt the tongue now, parched and swollen, rasping across her broken and torn skin, wetting itself in her blood. She hung there in agony as she felt the wound upon her chest forced open because of the Blackcrawlers tongue. Greedily it fed from the gash that had been torn there. She felt its tongue hungrily and savagely lick deep within her wound, rough and searching, it seemed to grate across bone. As its mouth moved, she felt sharpened and broken teeth graze across the ends of torn flesh, the roughness of its mouth occasionally catching and ripping her skin even more as it fed upon her blood. As it sought to taste her, she felt its excitement rise and the hand that held her prisoner against the wall tightened its grip, the creatures thumb now embedded deep within the fullness of her young breast. She looked down and wished she hadn’t as the creature withdrew its thumb from deep within her, the blood now flowing freely from the depth of the cut and she felt the newest and strongest waves of dizziness wash over her. She feebly kicked out at him again but he was too strong and she was weakened and devoid of strength. She knew he had moved his head to the hole in her breast because she felt the rough probing of its tongue plunge deep within the gaping skin over her breast. She also knew that at some point she had stopped caring. The pain was beyond description, yet death was too far away, so she rode the pain numbly, the crests and swells rising up over and over again.

As blackness washed over her she willed herself to be carried away on it. She suddenly felt the Blackcrawler stiffen against her, its teeth embedding deep within broken flesh and the hand that held her in place, involuntarily pressing deep within her again in one last hold of death. She was pinned tightly against the wall yet she noticed the immense strength of the Blackcrawler begin to grow slack. Where before its tongue and mouth drinking hungrily from her body had been the only sound in the room, she felt the rough leathery skin pressed against her skin now breathing loudly in ragged and broken breath.

Without warning, its grip on her body lessened and she slid down the wall. With one last futile effort the creature desperately attempted to gain purchase on her body without success. Its left leg gave out first and she watched, pinned between the wall and the monster, as it dropped to its knees, its face now buried against her blood soaked stomach, its hands clutching desperately and raking down her sides as it completely lost its grip. Behind the Blackcrawler, standing crookedly and swaying, Jax held the end of her ceremonial short sword.

With his remaining strength sapped, she watched as Jax fell awkwardly back into a sitting position, then slowly rolled to his side and lay unmoving. As the door to her chambers burst open to the sound of yelling guards and terrified chambermaids, she watched as the Blackcrawler toppled and dropped to its side, an extremely fine example of Guardian bronzed steel, a gift from her father on her sixteenth birthday, protruding from its stomach.

She knew she should sit now but before she could make her body follow the thoughts her mind gave, she fell forward unceremoniously, her beautiful face cracking against the bare, smooth stone floor at the feet of the running guards.

________________________________________________
This is a test write. Another part of the same story was released earlier this week at Art of Agony, The Assassin Comes and In Total Darkness. A big thank you to [blog 1hotwahine], [blog citizen_five] and [blog sj365] for their thoughts and advice.

Also, please see Carress' new post titled [post 286322]. It is that time again!

Copyright 2006 Travelingintexas

jadedbabe78 107F

3/30/2006 12:42 am

Hmm..maybe readers are so touched by the writing that they are rendered speechless....

Hell if I know, I'm just typing crap.

I liked it, it's well written and a good story.


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:47 pm:
What are you still doing up? LMAO

Nightguy_1961 56M
4866 posts
3/30/2006 1:07 am

trav,

Sometimes, it's hard to come up with comments that do your writing justice....and that's the dyin' truth, mi hijo.

NG61


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 11:22 am:
Night~~I appreciate your words man. I also want to clarify what I meant. This blog typicaly isn't about semi-serious writing. I normally like to have a good time here. What I was trying to say was this stuff I was doing may have been too heavy and too much at one time, basicaly because of times sake. I know commenting can be difficult because [blog citizen_five] had the same issue with his Shadow Infraction. I just like to keep my blog more interactive and I felt it couldnt be that way if I was pouring a ton of writing out. Does that make sense or am I not making sense? LOL I can't tell. This isn't just to you but in response to everyones comments at the top of the comment list lol. What I said or mean't wasn't a complaint or negative in anyway. Just wanting to be a good custodian of everyones invested time.

As far as comments, sure, we all judge feedback and conversation on comments here. I trust you guys opinion and if I got a "this part sucks why don't you consider it this way" comment I would be more than happy to give that some thought.

HBowt2 60F

3/30/2006 1:33 am

don't take the lack of comments that way Trav....maybe they don't know what to say.....
Question for you....do you do your blog for you or for others...if you enjoy writing like this then don't let other people's opinion stop you....this is powerful writing....you are talented my friend....


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:31 pm:
I would say it is a mixture. Depending upon my mood, I write for me or I write for others. I tend to be on the same page as Core though when she says if she didnt want feedback she would do an offline journal. This kind of writing though I do for others enjoyment. If they enjoy reading it then the effort was worth it and it encourages me to keep on. I am still a bit nervous about sharing this kind of writing though so it streches me to the next level. I just figured people were getting bored with it lol and didnt want to bore people if I could help it LOL

willing2tryit42 41M
1141 posts
3/30/2006 1:37 am

I just dont want to type anything stupid that would ruin this great story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:28 pm:
LOL You couldnt say anything stupid.... but I understand your feelings. It is why I dont typically comment on poetry. I feel I will say the wrong thing. But I appreciate the time you have spent reading these man...

rm_jackie40503 71T
1323 posts
3/30/2006 2:30 am

trav, as nightguy and hbowt said, its hard to come up with meaningful comments when you write stories like this. Don't let the lack of comments stop you from writing, we do enjoy them even if we don't comment on all of them.

Hugzzz,
Jackie


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:38 pm:
Then I will take your encouragement to heart and write on.... THanks for always stopping by and being such a great sport!

starvingnow 49F

3/30/2006 5:24 am

don't stop, i don't want you to stop....please don't stop


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:38 pm:
What are we talking about? LMAO

deliciousngood 65F
1666 posts
3/30/2006 7:06 am

WE sit in awe...simply that!


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:41 pm:
Wow.... How do you respond to that.... just WOW!

rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
3/30/2006 7:14 am

    Quoting ArcticRomance:
    "I also see that many of you have become silent in comments and I take this to mean it is too much and not exactly what you want to read here. Which is ok. So this will be the last post of this kind for a while."

    There it is.Definative proof that all you want is comments.This blogs not about anything but the comments.

    How sad.
You need to just fuck off. You have NO clue about Trav. I won't say he doesn't care about comments, but I will say he cares a hell of a lot more about the people that come here to read his stuff. He's touched and helped a lot of people through his writing. He cares, very possibly too much sometimes. He has an overwhelming desire to please, even people he doesn't know. Strangers. Assholes that make judgements without the facts. People that call him a fucking hypocrite because they were so small-minded that they didn't get a joke. He's been accused of nearly EVERYTHING under the sun on this site and probably 95% of the time it's all baseless.

I have seen people call him every name in the book as his blog rose in popularity. Men read his blog and comment here and like him. Women read his blog and adore him. But there are, and always will be, those people that want to see the king fall off the hill. Those people get some perverse satisfaction in other people's failures, more than likely out of jealousy because they have never been a success at anything in their tiny little lives.

You say "This blogs not about anything but the comments." You don't know how wrong you are. I went round and round with him for a couple months, telling him NOT to delete comments so that he could stay below another blogger. If someone is going to be at the top of the list, let them earn it, don't "give" it to them.

You are wrong. I base my opinion of you on your statement, that in and of itself might be wrong, but you have yet to prove to me that you are anything but wrong. Trav has proven everything to me. I know him and I don't like people that fuck with my friends. In any way.


Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:41 pm:
OK... now I am sitting here in awe....

crazygurl2xx 58F

3/30/2006 8:04 am

keep up the good work and don't let a lack f comments stop you. this work is not about comments, as if i had to even say it!


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:42 pm:
You are right.... and I will continue!

Sorceror07 55M

3/30/2006 8:52 am

freakin awesome trav!!! i LOVE it! ...but then i AM a blood and gore kind of guy

btw... read all about it! How TRAV made his Great Escape part 6 showdown at Val's DefJam Chop Shop and Monster Garage

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:43 pm:
Silly me.... was there blood and gore in this installment? Oopsie!

rm_corezon 54F
3376 posts
3/30/2006 9:15 am

    Quoting ArcticRomance:
    "I also see that many of you have become silent in comments and I take this to mean it is too much and not exactly what you want to read here. Which is ok. So this will be the last post of this kind for a while."

    There it is.Definative proof that all you want is comments.This blogs not about anything but the comments.

    How sad.
Hmmm. Blundering ahead here as usual...

I think you totally misinterpeted the point here in that the value of comments in this context is the FEEDBACK...it's hard to tell what people think of your posts if they don't leave any comments.

Plus it's downright FUN to get comments 'cause it's FUN to interact with other people. What's wrong with that? Why else would we be here?

If all we wanted to do was record our own thoughts or write creatively for ourselves alone we would be keeping those writings in an offline diary only; not blogging about them.

And I will say that even though I say I don't really care how popular I am for the sake of popularity itself, I DO like people commenting on my blog because I like to know that I am not communicating into a void.

This format provides feedback and interaction from other people and that can be validation for ourselves; that's why it's so therapeutic for many of us and none of us is so much of an island that we never need or want feedback from others no matter what we claim.


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:43 pm:
Blunder all you want because I couldnt have said it better...

rm_corezon 54F
3376 posts
3/30/2006 9:45 am

Sorry Trav, I um, got off there on one of my tangents again; delete that one if you like

I'm loving reading your writing. Creative writing just isn't that interactive as a whole; it isn't because it isn't good; it's great!!

and thank you Daphne, I just saw your comment when I refreshed the page...now I don't feel so alone!


rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
3/30/2006 10:00 am

What Corezon said about creative writing not being interactive as a whole is exactly right. But I'm tired of saying it already, lol.

Finish it, bc.

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:44 pm:
Can you say it again? Just one more time? I have a thick skull lol

deliciousngood 65F
1666 posts
3/30/2006 10:06 am

Yeah...he likes FEEDBACK...nothing wrong with that.


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:45 pm:
Your comment whore awaits milady!

StillSmokin2oo6 45M/44F

3/30/2006 1:26 pm

Great story,, we both loved it!!


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:46 pm:
Thanks for stopping by my not so humble little blog trailer!!!!

LadytoPleaseYou 65F
5447 posts
3/30/2006 2:26 pm

Trav..this is awesome. You can't possibly stop NOW. If I hadn't told you lately that I love you...then I love you!!!! I have been impressed with your writing and these stories are incredible. YOu are a master here......

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:50 pm:
Wow.... Love you too my dear... thanks for the awesome words of encouragement...

EyeCandy33333 46F
761 posts
3/30/2006 2:35 pm

Hmmmm I have to keep coming back and reading it to make sure I have absorbed it properly-but somehow I do believe it wud sound gooooood coming from your own lips into my ears!


travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:49 pm:
LOL Huh? You want me to whisper sweet nothings about digging holes in your hooties?

rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
3/30/2006 4:46 pm

travelingintexas replies on 3/30/2006 2:44 pm:
Can you say it again? Just one more time? I have a thick skull lol


Ya think? Really?

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


MyRealLoverOne 47M

3/30/2006 4:49 pm

    Quoting ArcticRomance:
    "I also see that many of you have become silent in comments and I take this to mean it is too much and not exactly what you want to read here. Which is ok. So this will be the last post of this kind for a while."

    There it is.Definative proof that all you want is comments.This blogs not about anything but the comments.

    How sad.
Hey you...King of Commenting Whores! Why are you using up all the comments.....OH SHIIIIITTT!!! Here comes Daph....Sorry Trav...You are the greatest....I love you man...Tell Daph not to kill me...Pleeeeeezzz!!!! *RL bows down to the King*

Trav man - You are blessed to have friends like Daph, and I agree with her 100%. You are much appreciated here my friend.


barbiebunny 38F
5597 posts
3/30/2006 5:47 pm

like it & go on..*sipping cup of coffee*

Its good to be...ME


EyeCandy33333 46F
761 posts
3/30/2006 6:57 pm

No you nutter-just read what you have written silly(and of course it will come into my ears)-now whisper nice personal things in my ears that I like if ya wanna afterward!


bardicman 51M

3/30/2006 10:32 pm

I never knew you to be such a comment whore trav.

I mean, my insides are utterly shattered.

NOT !!!

Whore on Brother !!!!!



I am not dead yet


Becca53913 58F
131 posts
4/4/2006 11:31 pm

If you embrace your creative energy you will well know that it is a fascinating piece or riveting work. I think the writer in you could not stop at this point even if you wanted to. IT is in the blood and has to be written on paper or the torment of words will rebound in your mind until they are. So really no question of you continuing just if you are going to keep posting it for us all to enjoy!
let it be the later as I have been caught. Not easy for a seasoned reader/writer that I am.
new reader of your works
Becca


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