Dr. Trav and Mr. Hyde...Something's Been Hiding...FFS!  

travelingintexas 42M
posts
1/26/2006 11:09 am
Dr. Trav and Mr. Hyde...Something's Been Hiding...FFS!

Background Music:
Mess Round, Ray Charles


Ummmmmmm….

Well… ya see……

OK… Here is the deal. I am a bit embarrassed. Funny I can talk about heart stuff but freeze at this stuff. However, to follow my guidelines of absolute honesty here I must do this. Oh good grief. OK… I am ready. I can do this.

So last night, I errrrrrrr….

Sorta needed to cum. There I said it. Yup. No fear here. Of course I was alone so that really only leaves me with one option. Well two if you consider the electric outlet, which I don’t, or maybe three, if you throw the blender in the mix which I most certainly don’t.

I digress.

So, it was late. Like 2AM. I was all alone and really wanted to ummmmm cum . So, I found a little porn on the internet and settled in on the chair to do this thing. For you ladies, this would equate to an hour long bubble bath, music and candles. Barstool and internet porn is the guy version.

Oh My Gawd!

Right off the bat, I noticed something was different. ABSOLUTLY HUGE! Even when not completely hard yet. Not just that, it hurt. I mean, throbbing hurt. My whole groin area, nut and weenie ached. (Love using the word weenie where I should use dick…anyway) It grew and grew and freaking grew some more. Suddenly, I was playing with a Macy’s Day Parade float. I know what you’re thinking, Trav’s imagination has run off again.

NAY! Not so! I’m as serious as I have ever been. Freaking huge.

Pssst…. Come here…. Not too close mind you because you can’t, but just a little closer. It is secret time. I personally like the fact that I am smooth, straight and no veiny things, if ya know what I mean.

Not last night. It was the Mr. Hyde of weenus.

The head was HUGE. It was purple. It was a monster and it hurt! Man did it hurt. I kid you not. All joking aside. I had 2 inches more than normal. 2! (Which for a 3.75 incher on a normal day is almost double.)

I was straining in my chair. Now, I am a guy and this is how most guys think.

I have (James Earl Jones voice over) MAMMOTH DICK!

It hurt, but I didn’t want it to go away, I mean, I had to show someone. But it was 2:30AM now and everyone was in bed. Sheeesh. Just my luck. Mr. Stumpy decides to make a bona fide appearance and no one is around to prove it even existed or hell, for that matter to use it.

So, hurting, bewildered and perplexed, I did the only thing a man could do. I kept it as long as I could. Problem is, it was just me and now it wouldn’t fit in the electrical socket or blender, much to my dismay because I was miserable. But I was a trooper. I held on until it hurt so bad I couldn’t maintain. And then I sucked it up and held on for another 10 minutes. I don’t remember much of that time as I was calling out in Finnish to hallucinations that were swirling before my eyes, but dang it!

I had MAMMOTH DICK!

I reached the point where it was either explode or die. Pride or survival? I chose pride!

Why? I’m a man FFS!

So, quickly losing consciousness, I clicked on a new video and my survival instincts decided to kick in. Holding on for dear life, I came.

Now, this wasn’t your grandaddy’s orgasm. No sir!

This was (James Earl Jones Voice Over) MAMMOTH ORGASM!

And I exploded. Exploded and kept on!


Come on guys, ya know when you are playing with Rosey palm and her five fingers, ya do the deed, get done, maybe clean off, roll over and sleep. Oh hell no. No such luck. I had to keep going. It felt like more needed releasing and it just rolled on and on and on with the finish line getting farther and farther away. I almost fell out of the chair. I almost passed out again. I screamed the name of an ancient Mayan princess! Things were blurry!

But by gawd I had MONSTER DICK!

It finally ended somewhere around 3AM or maybe 8AM, I couldn’t see clearly. Finally. I sat on this stool for what seemed like forever surveying the carnage around me. Spent, still hard and in pain. I could barely move. Every movement an immense pain to my groin area. My stomach hurt from the strain of release. My back was taut.

I limped to the bed, fell down and was immediately asleep.

I awoke this morning and groaning, limped to the computer, logged on and I am still in pain. I feel as if someone kicked me in the nuts with size 14 steel toed boots. My size 14 steel toed boots. I have never, experienced anything like that in my life. Shit, I just now moved and even my ass hurts. What the hell? I didn’t even do anything to that. My upper thighs are sore. I’m a wreck.

So, I am going to take a hot shower right now. I’d take a hot bath and just sit there but I would get stuck or something. So I am just gonna stand there. Geeez… What is that place called between your nuts and yer third eye? That even hurts right now.

So, help me out! What the heck happened? How do I make it happen again without the freaking pain and residual effects such as not being able to freaking walk straight? LOL

Where were you people when I needed you?

WHAT WAS THAT THING!


rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
1/26/2006 1:16 pm

"And then I sucked it up and held on for another 10 minutes."

Dude, I didn't know you were THAT limber.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


onelittlesecret 34M
1579 posts
1/26/2006 2:06 pm

Ummm, maybe I shouldn't have sent those pics to you...


ThumbChickStool 34F

1/26/2006 2:12 pm

Hun, that's a sure sign that you need to take care of yourself more often. Prevention is the best first step. :: grins ::


maverick19605 61
53 posts
1/26/2006 2:23 pm

Geez, Trav, did Louisa send you some private pics that the rest of us haven't seen? Is so, I'll pay GOOD money for them! Just let me know so I can send you my email address. ...

Or has your fevered imagination gotten the best of you at last?

Either way, relax.
Don't worry.
Be happy.

For the day will come when you, too, need Viagra to cum like Niagra. ... Ergo, treasure the memory / dream while you can. ...

Mav


Sorceror07 55M

1/26/2006 2:37 pm

damn! where can i get one of those from? i can always take a percocet for the pain lol! ...and the side effects from the perc is it lasts much longer too... like, MUCH longer!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


darganot 37M

1/26/2006 2:51 pm

I agree with native, you definately need empty the chambers more often. I have had raging hard-ons and spewing orgasms, but nothing like the monstrosity you describe. I love to give myself blue balls but will still empty it all in one huge load.


norprin5 56M

1/26/2006 3:53 pm

what you need to do, my masturbatory friend, is do it more often. don't let it build up. that should help with the pain.

oh, and don't forget the lotion...

King Nor XVIII


LadytoPleaseYou 65F
5447 posts
1/26/2006 4:18 pm

Gee Trav....all I can say is that it was such a waste....all us horny women out here and we couldn't help you out.

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?


rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
1/26/2006 5:00 pm

you know, I think onelittlesecret is onto something...

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


oldman1776 79M
3164 posts
1/26/2006 5:19 pm

Hell son you got to whank it more often keep down the presure.


barbiebunny 37F
5597 posts
1/26/2006 5:21 pm

Did u see king kong before u went to bed??!!

Its good to be...ME


ArealUnicorn 45F

1/26/2006 6:23 pm

Trav wish I could help...did you happen to bookmark the site you were at...maybe that had something to do with it...or better yet do what mel gibson did in that movie where he could read womans thoughts just do everything the same and hey yah never know..., but if you do figure it out you have to let us all know...


AGNJoe1 48M

1/26/2006 6:43 pm

Trav, I will take the serious route here...I'll go out on a limb here and say that monster dick for you isn't normal, so if that's the case, you may want to go to a doctor to get this checked out for trouble. Unless you haven't had a release in a loooooong time, there should be no good reason why the penis should increase more in size than normal. It just sounds extremely unnatural. For health's sake, you might want to go to see a doctor, Trav.

AGN Joe

p.s.---I will admit, you had me laughing myself silly at your pain. Yes, that's bad, but dude, that was some funny shit you typed.


rm_Bct2Esi 52M/51F
1375 posts
1/26/2006 7:12 pm

I am going with ladytopleaseyou, all of us woman and NONE of us here to rescue you?


Sister_Act_4_You 39F/39F

1/26/2006 7:31 pm

Trav, how did I manage to miss this spectacular event?!?


frbnkslady 49F
6183 posts
1/26/2006 8:30 pm

ROFLMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..... I am glad you came through with flying colors.. T

T




SpunkNLace 48F

1/26/2006 8:56 pm

hahahahahhahahahahha after I stopped crying I laughed so hard I thought to myself hmmm did you perhaps visit your pharmacist and forget the trip.


redlipsprincess
(Princess Lips)
52F

1/26/2006 10:03 pm

trav,
like the private dick pic... lol

TTFN


TheQuietGuy2005 55M
2386 posts
1/26/2006 10:18 pm

I don't know how you can recreate it without the agony ... but if you find out, please feel free to pass on the information!


slidein2meplz 63F
1994 posts
1/26/2006 10:46 pm

Damn... lol... I should've IM'd you at 4 am ... I was still up.. lol.

~~~ Just me, poppin to say HI! ~~


tillerbabe 57F

1/26/2006 10:57 pm

OMG! OOOOH MY GAAWWWD! LMAO! Damn.....dude, it's a "weenus"..got that?
WEE-NUS!


darganot 37M

1/27/2006 2:13 am

there u go the BP meds i'm sure of it.


dasher121 37M

1/27/2006 6:45 am

WOW that must have been some load dude!!! I heard a faint crying out in the distance, awoke and asked "what the hell was that??!!!" And fell peacefully back asleep.

Woke up this morning and, while leaving for work, slipped and fell in a pile of your "pimp juice!!!"

Said to myself, "Wow nice aim Trav! You hit Western PA with that shit!"

Then said "EEEEEWWWWWW!" and had to take another shower and immediately put on another pair of clothes and shoes. So my question to you kind and erruptful sir:

Can you please call my boss and explain why i was late this morning?


fantasylover_05 63M

1/27/2006 7:02 am

Sounds to me like it was worth a little pain!! LOL


rm_sj365 56F
2414 posts
1/27/2006 7:11 am

dude! i told you never to talk about your dick to me....sheesh


rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
1/27/2006 7:57 am

Leave it ALONE, ffs.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


MISS_KINK 39F

1/27/2006 8:13 am

ahhh, Poor baby.
Hope the Beast(your Weenie as you call it)is doing better today.
I do wonder what cause it.
P.S.
You are absolutely breath taking in that Blue Photo but then again you know I love your pictures.


mysteriesofme 45F

1/27/2006 9:30 am

Love the new picture.. (Mammothly)

and the post.. delicious..


aascrompn 43M
6444 posts
1/27/2006 11:57 am

You make me laugh!


SaucyTart_36 48F

1/27/2006 12:24 pm

What is FFS?

Would have loved to watch something like that?


SaucyTart_36 48F

1/27/2006 12:24 pm

What is FFS?

Would have loved to watch something like that!


slidein2meplz 63F
1994 posts
1/27/2006 2:49 pm

    Quoting SaucyTart_36:
    What is FFS?

    Would have loved to watch something like that!
I'll field this one for ya Trav....

F F S
means
For Fucks Sake


~~~ Just me, poppin to say HI! ~~


onelittlesecret 34M
1579 posts
1/27/2006 7:09 pm

btw, what is WEG?

lol


starvingnow 49F

1/27/2006 7:37 pm

ok trav....looks like i need to come over tomorrow


SaucyTart_36 48F

1/28/2006 6:37 am

Trav,

Just waiting for an invite.....

-Saucy


rm_emeraldss 43F
25 posts
1/28/2006 1:19 pm

Well trav...

I seem to agree sound like an enlarged prostate..either that or not taking care of it more often or letting someone take care of it..poor baby...Im sure you will get over the soreness don't think you getting back on the meds is the cause about the only thing the meds will will cause is for you to use restroom more often...You be okay I promise...


moonfire2u 70F
2602 posts
1/28/2006 2:58 pm

you give a whole new meaning to one-eyed monster.

kind thoughts,
Moonfire


EyeCandy33333 45F
761 posts
1/28/2006 3:48 pm

Size 14 boots-emmmmm-sooo is it true what they say about a man with large feet


rm_emeraldss 43F
25 posts
1/28/2006 9:10 pm

well my dear trav...

Your prostate controls both your bathroom issues and your sperm.. when it is enlarged some men find it difficult or are up a lot whether to use the restroom or they may not be able to ejaculate fully.. In this case sounds like the swelling has gone done and the saying we need a way out NOW..... Hope this helps...

emeraldss


LadytoPleaseYou 65F
5447 posts
1/29/2006 8:28 pm

What DO they say about men with large feet and large hands????

Big gloves and big shoes

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?


kyplowboy22 62M

1/30/2006 5:24 am

It would appear, son that you performed the thing that legends are made of. Yes, you have finally managed to pull the imfamous 'dick string'. lmao, rollin in the dirt. Later

kpb


rm_hinkawaza 53M
371 posts
2/3/2006 3:39 pm

Trav, that bp med wasn't a little blue pill, was it?


duststormdiva 52F
6854 posts
2/7/2006 6:31 am

Did you at least take a picture of it?????

This was the funniest thing I have read in a LONG time. Sorry to get humor out of your pain, but I loved it. lol

DustStormDiva


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