Alone..... No Reflection in the Mirror....  

travelingintexas 42M
9/28/2005 8:13 pm
Alone..... No Reflection in the Mirror....

I sit here, alone in my thoughts, watching as the couple beside me discuss trivial thing and emotions of the heart. I miss. I long. I have nothing. I sit here, watching in my pain. Knowing I can not share in their joy. My well runs dry. Emptiness fills my soul. Offers of false waters come and go. Nothing appeals. Nothing desired. I sense and watch others, hungry for their interactions, their touches, their personal and secret joy. I long to have, to hold, to feel safe once again.

Confusion, boundless confusion, encircles me, ensnares my heart for loneliness is my only friend. Entrusted with this secret burden I secretly watch from the corner of my eye, wishing I could trade places and be one of them, like them, with them. I long for the opportunity to talk to one in love, in hope, in desire but to no avail. Loneliness makes pale friendship.

I sit alone. Alone in a place that strikes the very epicenter of my heart. I crave the affections of my friends. Their voice, my salvation from my place of solitude. I feed upon the great need of friendship and love yet sense none in the physical realm. My lasting peace of heart is here, however the pain of solitude seems to close in and near shatter the beating of my heart. Over and over my heart calls out to be loved and shrouded in the cloak of love. Every beat of my heart is a soul cry of desperation to be touched, to be held to no longer be alone.

So much I long to share, to offer, to give yet none take up the challenge. Too far, no way, distance creates a chasm of a different hell I can not escape but flee to. I no longer sense the feelers of unworthiness for this is not their touch. This is the inner waking of a soul calling out to be touched, unbound and filled with an amazing joy at its union with another. Sought high and sought low. Looking around the bend and waiting patiently in this place. My soul screams out to be touched in a powerful, unequaled way. No longer is it able to settle, to settle, to settle. Much more do I offer than the lie I am not enough.

Salvations footsteps echo in my distant mind. Coming but not quite seen .Songs of hope and adoration fill this empty place, long to be sung but hide in fear of pain and angst once more. So far away the light does seem, never to get much closer.

barbiebunny 38F
5597 posts
9/28/2005 11:21 pm


Its good to be...ME

barbiebunny 38F
5597 posts
9/28/2005 11:22 pm


Its good to be...ME

tillerbabe 57F

9/28/2005 11:42 pm

Let me hold you..kiss your eyes....not alone, but loved.
Let me make you laugh, drink your tears,..not alone, but adored.
Let me make you blush, compliment your soul, not alone, but seen.
Let me listen, to your heart, not alone, but felt. are so NOT ALONE!


rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
9/29/2005 12:20 am

That was damn near poetry Trav.

hugs baby

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

madkitten 55F
291 posts
9/29/2005 2:13 am

Well written Trav. Things will change.

(Princess Lips)

9/29/2005 2:35 am

your mojo was in your soul babe...



DefiniteTrouble 51F

9/29/2005 3:01 am

Although quite painful, T, that was truly beautiful.

And it's something we've all felt.

You're not alone. Never alone.

Love ya (kiss & hug)

lushgirl69 50F

9/29/2005 4:23 am

Sugar...what I have found is that what we crave most is often just out of grasp...the perpetual longing you describe is a portion of what brings us to places such as this....I am only willing to focus on the physical right now, but that is not to say that it doesn't get to me sometimes....I know you read my blog from yesterday and yes, it's that damn mirror....I have been guarding my heart pretty close, and alone isn't always bad, but we all need to feel loved, needed and a part of something.....light's still on...just down the road...consider yourself hugged, doll.

__Huntress__ 56M/59F

9/29/2005 5:09 am

Sweet baby ... you have so much more than you think you do ... while lost in the void ... take this time to heal your tired heart ... love you !

beewulf9 39M

9/29/2005 5:55 am

Dear T,

As Jez mentions you are not alone. And all your fears expressed are something we all deal with. And when we are in that same place as you are in your post, you support and encourage us with your words. I hope we are able to do the same with you.

dano6332 57M

9/29/2005 6:40 am

Hey T, Remember there are good days and bad days. There has been a lot of stress lately and your just on the downslope of the adrenaline. Relax, talk, blog, no booze and remember you have lots of friends here. Remember everything passes and time is our friend. She is out there

(Juan S)
2642 posts
9/29/2005 7:08 am

A departure from what I am used to seeing from you Trav...
You constantly surprise me...You have friends here, and friends in the real world.
You are never alone...

onelittlesecret 35M
1579 posts
9/29/2005 8:12 am


this is beautiful.

I don't comment here often, but you have a great blog that I enjoy almost every day.

How 'bout a man hug?

playfulwithyou33 57F
961 posts
9/29/2005 9:57 am

Playful ISN'T Feeling So Playful Any More...

It is with some sadness and much disapointment that I am writing this post to inform you that I WILL NO LONGER BE COORDINATING THE UPCOMING BLOGGER'S CONVENTION; nor at this time do I have intentions of attending it as well.(due to personality conflict)

Do NOT send any more checks to REED ENTERPRISES!

If you have sent in a check for the Masked Ball I will return it promptly.

I have emailed individuals regarding transportation, rideshares/roomshares--trying not to leave anything dangling. If I have caused you any inconvenience...I apologize.

Thank you for reading this and I hope you have a fun filled trip to the Blogger's Convention.


kyplowboy2 63M

9/29/2005 4:45 pm

Don't know who said it, but "this too shall pass". Some days are great, some just suck out loud. Most of them though, are niether real good nor bad, just average. Some days things are rather mundane and that's just as good as they get. Hope things are settlin' down again over your way, understand there are things goin' on behind the scenes that are not so good. Been there, done that. Tuition in the school of hard knocks. lol Hope it gets better real soon. Later


rm_luke69iner 49M
3275 posts
9/29/2005 5:26 pm

hang in there Trav

remember it never rains forever

sooner or later the sun returns

you're too good of a person to be alone too long

you and the lady you are looking for will find each other

S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo

LustGoddess2469 51F  
2453 posts
9/29/2005 6:07 pm

I sit here, alone, connected only by a keyboard and screen, reaching out to you, offering solace, comfort, my heart and soul. I feel your pain, your loneliness, your need. I hurt with you, for you.

Clear your mind and see with your heart the path that has been laid before you. Share with me your thoughts of hope, desire, love, and I will share as well.

Hear the voice, see the words, feel the thoughts, as they are true and real. Allow the affection to envelope you, protect you from the darkness and help you to heal. It is there. It is real. Embrace it.

Distance is merely time. A few hours separate the questions and the answers. A small obstacle, indeed, when the rewards are tolled.

Let your heart sing. Let your soul fly among the clouds. Happiness awaits you. Reach out and grasp it, hold it close, and the light will shine brightly and enlighten you to all that you desire and long for.


keithcancook 61M
18138 posts
9/30/2005 6:34 am

Time for a beach trip my friend. Just do it!

keithcancook 61M
18138 posts
9/30/2005 6:35 am

And may the Farce be with you!

rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
9/30/2005 1:42 pm

I hesitated to respond to this yesterday because I feel like you don't really "know" me, so who am I to comment. But on second thought, I've decided that's why I should. In addition to the folks that you feel like you know here, there are probably ten times as many more who are quietly apprecating your brains, heart and courage. And I just wanted you to know that.

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

keithcancook 61M
18138 posts
10/1/2005 5:30 am

Ha ha! Very funny...

Sweetest_Sin_Jes 38F

10/1/2005 7:48 pm

<~~~~~ LOVES me some Trav! Kiss Kiss - Hug Hug!


rm_sexypinay16 45F
311 posts
10/5/2005 3:35 am

Hi...I dont know your blog has really touched a cord in my heart.Well im one of those many people who admire your depth and substance as a man. Your blogs greatly shows who you are and dont worry you are being loved by many people in this site. I wonder how an amazing man like you can be so lonely...there are many beautiful women esp in your country sure many of them will love and adore you.

Love..Faith ..and Hope..

rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
11/3/2005 11:56 pm

Alone..... No Reflection in the Mirror....

OMG! You''re...YOU'RE a VAMPIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

Become a member to create a blog