smooth as a baby's bottom  

tornadovolcano 42M
2 posts
8/8/2006 2:35 pm

Last Read:
11/6/2011 2:43 pm

smooth as a baby's bottom

Maybe it was the internet porn I was perusing the previous night. Maybe it was something in the air that inspired me - an impulse, a desire, a curiousity. A calling. And what did this mysterious voice on the wind say to me? It said 'why don't you trim your pubes? Give yourself a porn-cock.'
Well I thought 'why not.' In my thirty one years living within reasonable distance of scissors and a comb, never had I entertained the notion (well I probably had, but just din't have the conviction to actually do it). Now a man of my convictions,of course, I got busy in the bathroom right away.
I gathered the necessary equipment, locked the bathroom door, stepped briskly out of my clothes and approached the hand basin. A few moments were spent going through the mirror ritual - kissing of guns, flexing of muscles, casting of winks and utterances of 'You da man'. Then I got straight down to business.
I hung my balls over the edge of the basin so that Percy perched proudly infront of the mirror and strategically so that all clippings would fall tidily in the sink. I felt a tingling sensation immediately jolt through my balls as they rested on the cold porcelain. 'Ooh' I panted, 'that's quite nice. Anyway how short shall I go?'
Length became an issue. Some would say 'doesn't it always?' Of course I'm quite happy with my length, so to speak, although I must say Juanito Tomas was looking a little bit apprehensive at the sight of me standing over him wielding the cutters. You see, I quite like the pile I've been given by the Great Rugmaker in the sky - nowhere near the tight knit that could have me cast as the wild man of the woods, but nowhere near the whispy whisp of the young nubile either. As it stands, I think I come in at 'just right' on the hairometer, with just enough in all the right places. Aside from those singular strays that pop up on the shoulders every now and then. Only small cause for concern.
So I decided the length to which I should cut my pubes should be in keeping with the style of the rest of me - rugged, je ne sais quois - I mean what kind of image am I trying to portray here in my nether regions.
Fuck it. I just got started. Scissor over comb. Short back and sides. Needless to say the initial tentative approach soon gave way to over-confident topiary. The display of finesse and vigour being reflected back at me all the while. So it wasn't long before I'd taken a little too much off the top and left it a bit straggly on the undercarriage. This left Henry looking a little bit sorry for himself, however I might add that during this preliminary ordeal he had expressed various emotions from feigning interest to active participation. (I should probably make the distinction now that Henry is the current term for my cock and not to be confused with Henry the mentor Hairdresser standing in the corner of the bathroom because Henry the mentor Hairdresser doesn't actually exist, I just made him up.
'Bugger it' I thought. 'I'm going to have to shave my sack.'
So I moved things into the shower and this was where the mood of amusement shifted more to pleasure, anticipation and exitement - particularly once I'd lathered up my balls with shaving cream.
Using my Gillette razor (the best a ballsack can get) I moved it with gentle and careful strokes across my pouch whilst the hot shower created a steamy atmosphere. Initially I had to lift Bobby out of the razors path but after a few strokes, and certainly as my balls became smoother to the touch, he was standing to attention and moving from side to side by his own accord. I squirted more shaving cream onto my balls so I could make a final pass with the razor. I had to resist lathering up my shaft and finishing the job properly if you know what I mean. So, happy with my handiwork, I rinsed the foam away under the shower.
'It's no use' I whimpered as I reached for the shaving foam and got all lathered up again, but this time I finished the job properly if you know what I mean. All these new sensations I was experiencing through my newly smooth, sensitive sack. Before I'd run off all the hot water completely, I rinsed myself off, dried myself and ajourned to the boudoir where I anointed my glands with some teatree balm(but that's another story).
'Ho Hum.' Of course, once I'd come to my senses I thought I'd go and parade Toby infront of the full length mirror just to reinstate his new found glory. As I peeled off my shorts, I was shocked to see that after his post shave slumber he resembled something more akin to a bald cat than that of a porn-cock.
I'm sure that once this tingly honeymoon is over, I shall welcome with open arms the stubbly purgatory that awaits.


RubyRedPetal 45F

8/9/2006 4:07 am

Oh sweetie, i laughed so much my kids came in wanting to know what i was laughin at!! I practiced the art of lying with some aplomb (i thought)!
Errrm, one question... how many names does ur willie have babe???

Welcome to the blogs. x

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kelpie1960 57F

9/29/2006 1:51 pm


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