Like the turtle  

teaser2009 35F
149 posts
6/29/2006 1:43 am

Last Read:
7/1/2006 5:34 pm

Like the turtle

I stick my neck out to see what's coming, instead of trying to protect myself. I crawl into the way because, well, that's where i need to be going. I can't stay forever in the same pond, if you do, you don't really learn anything about yourself. I find myself wanting to move forward, but afraid of the consequences if i do.

I thought of that when i was driving home tonight and a turtle was in the lane of traffic on a busy road in town. Granted it was 3am, it was still a bad place for a turtle to be. I swerved around him (i'm assuming it was a him, because all turtles look like boy turtles), and thought to myself "that little guy isn't afraid of this huge concrete road, so why am i afraid of letting myself enjoy life? I'm not going to get run over like that turtle might. Not only did it not seem like he was afraid, he was stretching his neck out there to see what was going on. Whyc an't people be like that? stick their neck out to see what's going on and not be afraid?

Why am i afriad to let go of some of the past? Does it make it mean less if i stop feeling so intensly those feelings i had on september 15th, and the 16th and so on? It doesn't make me a bad person if i try and enjoy a little bit of life, and smile, and find happiness again in myself and maybe in someone else. But everytime i have a little bit of that sunshine, i feel so guilty because paul isn't here..i'm a little turtle not sticking my head out of my shell.

STCMOguy4fun 38M

6/29/2006 3:12 pm

Hey you know that if you ever wanna talk to let me know... I will talk to you later.


STCMOguy4fun 38M

6/30/2006 8:56 am

Good advice mzHuny.

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