Have you ever picked up a street hooker ACCIDENTALLY!  

tamethytension 56M
1660 posts
7/20/2005 5:23 am

Last Read:
2/16/2007 6:02 pm

Have you ever picked up a street hooker ACCIDENTALLY!


Shades of Hugh Grant...

...well he says he was just giving her a lift
...just didn't specify with what.

That is what flashed through my mind 4 weeks ago today. I'm here in Lawton Oklahoma on assignment. SW OK has got to be among the hottest places in the US if you figure in the heat index and June was routinely pushing 110 daily. Well the nature of my work takes me outdoors, and involves vigorous exercise in sweltering heat (and I live for it ...

... so on this day, a combination of poor hydration and extreme heat, I found myself dizzy with a headache with slightly blurred vision by 10:30 am and knew I was in heat exhaustion, heading for heat stroke. Called it quits and made for town. Now understand my employer selects the project housing each year, and pickings are slim (or so they tell me). And this year we found ourselves in the "old town" section, apparently on the wrong side of the railroad tracks.

I momentarily pulled into the driveway of the small duplex we're staying in, only to back out thinking I need to get some aspirin. Not 50ft farther along is a stop sign at which I turn to hit the local mart 2 blocks away. There shuffling along in the street is a young woman in a long, flowing, flowery skirt. She mouths something to me (windows are up, AC cranked) as I turn the corner and figure she was asking for directions (I mean women do that right?). I slow and roll down the window, she comes up and asks whether I could take her to "Licker Avenue" (swear to the Goddess I am not making this up). Yours truly, who is typically oblivious to even the most ostentatious flirtations when coherent, was in no frame of mind to catch the double-entendre. So I explain I am unfamiliar with that area and she'll need to direct me... it's just a couple of blocks near the store she says ... Ok I'm heading there anyway ... hop in (SUCH AN IDIOT I can hear Napolean Dynamite whisper).

[Now what would you do? ... young woman ... disheveled and dead on her feet (from the heat you understand). As I posted previously, I am a sucker for damsel's-in-distress.]

So in she gets my SUV, and upon settling in (but only fumbling with the seat belt I recall in hindsight), says some thing barely audible through the fog of my dehydrated mind ... I don't want to freak you out she says ... but are you married? Huh? What was that? ..uhh no, just moved in back there on the corner (SMACK HEAD ON WALL NOW). She immediately brightens ... Really? then do you want to go and have some fun? I have not so much as gotten to the next stop sign when I look at her dumbly and try to process what she actually said ... but she obliges by repeating ... "come on want to have some fun". Hmmmm ... ahh that would be no I say politely but firmly (silently screaming HELL NO!). At this point negotiated some traffic and got through the intersection, as she with equal politeness (this is rural Oklahoma afterall) asked a third time... "you sure, we could just go back to your place for some fun". Now had I been more lucid, this would been THE PERFECT TIME to use a line that I have been saving for 20 years for just such an occasion ... namely "I don't think so honey, you could not afford me".... would have made for a better story but alas I must report that I simply said no thank you as I pulled up to the 2nd stop sign just across from the local mart. She with a nimbleness no doubt born of experience, quickly made a show of recognising a "girlfriend" in a passing car, and jumped out at the curb.

Yours truly, NEVER LOOKING BACK, proceeded through the intersection right on past the mart and drove in a REALLY BIG circle through town before heading home, all the while wondering whether a cop had witnessed the pick up.

But naught has come of it...and the young woman has not been seen again ..... big sigh of relief.

So Hugh ... I empathise buddy.

H4H

CuriousKitty675 43F
365 posts
7/24/2005 12:18 pm

Heh...except the hooker Hugh 'accidentaly' picked up had her mouth 'accidentally' attached to his johnson when he was busted didn't he? Good for you for not following his lead. Why buy when you can get it for free?


pussinboots4u 51M/49F

7/21/2005 8:46 am

As I told you, I'll tell you about it here. I had never seen a hooker until I think it must have been my mid 20's and there we were going out to a place called Crobar in Chicago, it was a new club at the time, the first time we were going there. We took the kennedy over to North Avenue, on North Avenue we were passing a bridge to get over the Chicago River and OMG - I screamed out, pointed and yelled - "Hookers!!! Wow!!! Just like on TV and the Movies!!!" My husband had burst out laughing and says - "You never saw a hooker before?"

No, I had never seen a hooker before, and I always thought that the hookers portrayed in tv shows and the movies must be exagerated - LOL. My husband said I looked like a kid that had just seen something new and it was cute.

So, If I was a guy and had seen this girl you are talking about - I most likely would have done the same thing that you did. Except, I probably would have burst out with "You're a hooker?????" - LOL.


leighann4 49F

7/21/2005 1:57 am

I would have to say that "No" I have never picked up a hooker accidentally.
I do have other embarassing moments that I don't wish to revisit but it seems that I don't have a choice since I provide them to all of the people who come into contact with me. The most recent episode came when I invited a man to my house for dinner. I then proceded to burn (as in black beyond recognition) the side dish of rice. I have since been able to reproduce the same dish without the horrid side effects, but it remains a topic of amusement to the gent.


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