The lifestyle  

swingherswaphim 41M/38F
13 posts
12/22/2005 11:08 pm

Last Read:
12/15/2006 7:06 pm

The lifestyle

The Tao (loosely quoted) says

The sage finds fulfillment by not seeking it.

What is it that we are looking for in this lifestyle? The next great fuck? Personal expansion? Does it lie only with carnal pleasure, or do we seek a completion by seeking others that yearn for something more?

Do we desire to fill a void, or are we simply overfilling expanding on a good thing? Is it the same for everyone?
Do we seek to please ourselves, or the chance to please others?

A little off the normal subject here I know. Like most everyone else here I love sexuality, lust, love, and the good-ol afterglow. After one night stands it is great to have something to spice up our conversation as a couple (and the moments during the stand are nice spice as well).

However the returns have (for me) been the most enjoyable and fulfilling, the latter fleeting and hollow. How many out there have found completion in the carnal alone, and who have found the complement in the intellectual expansion after, before, or during (the sex) with new-found partners?

What are we seeking? (if anything at all) And does the search ever end?

RockPebble 70M
2493 posts
12/28/2005 1:09 pm

Don't they call the brain the largest erogenous zone. Whether it's before, during or after the mental side controls the physical side. If you're not mentally stimulated you might as well be exercising. Happy new year.

scottdammit11 54M

12/30/2005 1:06 pm

The Tao of Steve (loosely quoted) says, "We are attracted to that which retreats from us". We are a curious species, and as long as we are curious, we live life to its fullest. May you always find unexpected pleasure wherever you go, with whomever you are with.

sexymt88 37M

1/2/2006 2:18 pm

Thanks again for the thought provoking posts. If it wasn't for you two's brilliance I would never have found anything actually intellectually stimulating on this site.

I have yet to determine everything that turns people on or off about the lifestyle. I know that all girls no matter how seemingly vanilla when I start dating them turn out to at least want to get involved to some degree when I am honest and open with them. Obviously I haven't ever spoken to a guy that doesn't at minimum want to fuck girls with his girl. So I know the statement, " The only one you indict is yourself when you say everyone. " BUT I do believe everyone wants to fuck and everyone has the capacity to seperate making love, from sex, from carnal fucking that is best between straight strangers.

I think the secret to getting woman ivolved is to NEVER bring the subject up to them, eventually in any relationship when sex is brought up that is when you are just honest about what you've done and are comfortable with, then you let them marinate on it and wait for the sex talk from them with you finishing their naughty thoughts. I find that that form of deprogramming works best because if you seem to eager you turn girls off. Also. At that moment challenge their view of sexuality. Make them answer questions about why in an equal society men can fuck multiple partners but woman aren't suppose to enjoy their orgasms? Ask them if they've ever fucked two dicks that were the same? When they answer no, ask them why they are just suppose to accept one dick the rest of their lives when different dicks feel so differently good? Because bottom line fellas if your average like me or big whatever cock you have there will be moments your lady desires whatever you aren't, just like you desire different pussy no matter how bomb your stuff is at home.

I don't know why I just got so off topic except that I think indirectly I am answering the question of why most of us do it ( at least the swingers I have known )The bottom line is no matter what if you love to fuck you appreciate the diffrences we each bring to the table. And it is those diffrences that we look for in this lifestyle. It is those moments that are hotter, than any porno movie, that we as swingers can expirience that keep us so damn happy and open.

Thanks again guys for your phenomenal post and your intellectualism.

swingherswaphim 41M/38F

1/8/2006 7:28 pm

Wasn't sure if there was much desire for a cerebral post... Nice to know there is a measure of "intellect" among us. Wish I was a little more sapiential, but hey I can quote the hell out those that are. (and pretend like I get it)

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