Fantasy v Reality  

story2k 49M
640 posts
10/3/2005 7:06 pm

Last Read:
10/9/2006 9:49 pm

Fantasy v Reality

I think that men have this idea that they could meet someone in cyberspace, hook up and walk away when it suits them. That's the fantasy. Yes, it does happen. But only as often as the Red Sox winning the World Series.

The reality is that hooking up requires more than just a hotel room and a spare afternoon. Even in a hookup you will need to get to know something about who you're meeting. How can you have great sex if you don't know anything about who you're hooking up with? And yes that means men will need to make plans, get in the car and go to the women. If a man or woman is attached it requires a lot more creativity.

There a lot of people who like the idea of hooking up (the fantasy) and don't follow through. Or worse, make plans and chicken out. Life happens of course, but how unlucky do you have to be to regularly cancel? I think this is where people (men and women) get frustrated.

Just my two cents.

ShyWhisper2006 54F
15175 posts
9/20/2006 2:26 am

Thank you...What you have said here is exactly what I have thought as well. Getting to know a person even just a little...would make things that much better. Thank you for affirming this for me *smiles*

lonelyinny5 45M/42F
126 posts
9/20/2006 6:28 pm

Thanks for your comments on my blog...I am flattered that you refer to mine in yours...

As for your post, I am not sure men "have" to put in any more effort/time than woman. I think they probably have different needs and abilities which make it look that way but, even hooking up for a night requires each party to give a little of themselves.

I have had a lover for the last 2 years, he lives in another country and I see him only when he comes in for business. We have amasing sex but the truth is I am not sure he even knows my last name and I don't know much about him either. We don't really chat so much, we usually get together and have fantastic sex for a couple hours and then we don't see one another for months and whilst there may be a desire for more there are never any expectations for more. We ask no personal questions of one another (although this isn't a rule) and still the chemistry is HOT because we have a sensational flirtation--and mentally when we do the chit-chat (in a once in a while email to make plans or whilst recooperating from hours of love-making)we just click. Oddly enough, after finally learning a little more about him during our latest rest period, I have found that, where it counts as people in our everyday lives, we are very different.

I suppose it is easier that we live so far away as there isn't the opportunity for either of to give or expect more.

But it is I said it's all in one's expectations which sadly most people aren't honest about either with themselves or their partner.

Keep in touch & Kisses, J

Searching for my fairytale: Passion & intimacy tied together in a warm, wonderful friendship

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