Saturday..just another day for the single gal..  

softnlush 54F
878 posts
5/20/2006 9:09 am

Last Read:
5/26/2006 6:24 am

Saturday..just another day for the single gal..

I was thinking about attraction..animal attraction between 2 people, the thing that makes 2 people crave eachother.

I have to admit in my journey called life,I have been luckier than most and if I had to say a percentage of men I was attracted to and the feeling was mutual..hmmm..95% of the time it worked in both our favors..I was attracted to him and he was into me and when that get fireworks..correct?

But what about attraction that is so intense for one and has absolutely zero on the person you are attracted to? Why is that? I used to take it very personal..because of my issues with self esteem,I immediatly assume he thinks I am not worthy,or I am not pretty enough..or I am boring..but why not just accept it..perhaps it is as simple as,he just is not attracted and it can have everything to do with simple can be gorgoeus,intelligent,exciting,worthy of any man (or woman) but the chemistry is not there for one of the parties,does that make him a bad person? No,of course not,does it make the person attracted a fool? No,of course not..they just felt what they felt and as long as the person of interest is not a total asshole (and trust me I have known some assholes) he will be flattered and not make you feel bad about yourself or your feelings.

I have been intensly physically attracted to one TASA man,I mean totally unable to speak at first,and then once introductions made,some what of an ease..but it did not go as I hoped..does that make him an asshole? nope..but,I am curious to why..when I thought perhaps he had an interest as well,what changed?? But because I refuse to believe it is entirely my fault for his lack of interest or change of heart..I just say que sera sera..

I had/have a huge crush on another man..I met here on AdultFriendFinder,but with so many things going on..I recently realized it is another one sided thing..that is fine,I do not harbor ill feelings about it,again it is what it is,and since he is not an asshole about it..and takes it for what it is worth..I am looking forward to a nice long friendship with him.

But what if I was the object of someone's crush,lust and I,not realizing it,made him feel bad about it. I am not saying this is fact,I really have no one has really made an obvious attempt at hitting on me at a group function..but what if there was someone harboring a crush on me and I did not feel it I now a bitch?? Does he think badly of me simply because I am not attracted to him in a sexual way? I may like him as a friend,does that go out the window because the agenda was hopefully to get me into bed?? I wonder about that..I know there has been hookups,when you have a group of like minded people..hook ups happen for sure and that is the whole point,right?

So what is it?..what is the thing that makes me consider a roll in the sack?..animal attraction that goes both ways..of course..someone I want to actually know on some level rather than a hi,how are ya,lets screw,see ya..not my style.

There is a downside to the meet and greets you know..the first couple of meets,you go with the hope that you will meet someone you can be into,it may not happen on the first or second,but by the third,if there was someone you had your eye on,you hope that perhaps then it will happen. But when it doesn't and you get to know the people as friends..I find it hard to go past that..and once I realize how many they may have inter-grouped with..I just simply end the notion..not my style again. The upside to the meet and greet is always and formost what ultimatly makes it so successful,to actually meet and get to know the people who post,and you chat with..and as long as you go without any expectations..the upside far outweighs the down side.

I am feeling lonely and I am just thinking about so many things,things I wish I would have said to someone or another before they moved on to a more surer thing..or allowing someone close enough and perhaps saying something to slam the brakes on it even before it began..or perhaps lowering my standards a bit about who and what I am looking for..but that sounds bad doesn't it? But I am looking for a certain something..something that makes me take notice and since I cannot really say what it is,it just depends on the man himself..why should I settle for less simply because I will be less lonely?

I was told I need to put myself more out there..and I am not good with that. I am afraid to be rejected,I am afraid to be a laughing stock if I did have the courage to tell someone I find them attractive/interesting whatever. I feel I put myself out there enough,by writing my feelings in my blog and being as honest as I can be,by going to the meet and greets,by going to other functions and being there..I dress to be noticed in a good way,so I accentuate the positives and try to hide the negatives as best as I can without being a liar..I will not dress sleazy or slutty to send the wrong signal or get unwanted advances and at my age,I could not pull it off anyway lol. But I do want to change my style a bit..I think next time we go to the palace I am going to get bucfannn in on it and help me dress to impress and maybe get a tongue or 2 dragging simply because I look the part,without sending signals that I am a hooker

I think it is time that softnlush is let loose,the woman I used to be,confidant without being obnoxious..sensual and knowing how to work it in a good way (not a tease here trust me)..when I am attracted to someone I let them know is time I do that again,hopefully one day I will see a man that is new,and moves me in a way that I come out of my shell and hopefully he will appreciate and reciprocate and I can have a nice little fling..which I really need right about now..someone into me,who wants to be with me..and not just a moment in the sack. Been there done is boring to me. I am sick to death of one sided unrequited lust..and I am sure most of you can relate to that in one form or another.

Now,where does that leave FWB,exactly where he is,which is too far distance wise to keep me locked into him..but honestly,when he gets back..I intend on having him everywhich way but loose..and if he stays long enough for me to actually bring him to a function..I will do so as well...until then..I am single and should be able to live my life as a single woman,and meet some single men and have a ball or I wrong???

Anyway as the song goes..another saturday night and I ain't got nobody...

Happy Saturday to all and hope you have a nice warm body to share it with


rm_marnisway 86F
5018 posts
5/20/2006 11:08 pm

It would be have the ideal mate...companion...lover...sidekick...warm body....person to laugh ....well.....everything with...

here's to hoping it will happen for all...*S*

nice post



Nothing is ever the same... when it comes to pleasures.

with a hint....the erotic senses will manifest into an abounding mess of flesh

the mind needs fulfillment of the body

if it feels good is good

I've done it again...*S*

lifes2short069 50M
138 posts
5/21/2006 3:23 pm

hugs hang in there, i know what you write and feel. I hope you find what ever your looking for in life, just remember don't live it for others. it is your time to do what you will. to make yourself happy. life's too short not to have fun.

l8r m8 L2S

maires 37M

5/23/2006 8:34 pm


Nice post... let me see if I can work some of it out with out rambling to much. I beleive its the chemistry. Certain type of people set me off. I used to think I could classify these type of people. At first I was postive that I was all about the blonds. I quickly found out after a relationship with one ... that it wasnt the color of her hair... well maybe not that quickly... Lets say I rinse and repeat that once for each hair color... somtimes I can be a slow learner. Reguardless its finally dawned on me, the lifting of an adolescent way of thinking perhaps... that it is pure chemistry / personality that determines my lust/love for someone.

Im gonna stop here, starting to write a novel, Good post though.

LargoFlaLady 46F

5/25/2006 5:05 pm

I think you are in my head....I have the same feelings, the same self esteem issues and the same knowledge that underneath it all, I was not always this way ... I used to be confidant and daring ...I need to rediscover that as well. Thank you for reminding me!

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