Music To My Ears  

smoothnjuicy4u 51F
426 posts
7/6/2006 10:22 am

Last Read:
7/19/2006 9:58 am

Music To My Ears

If ya are already down, don't read this one

Some days don't you wish you could turn off the music in your head?? Change the damn tune??

I hear sad depressing melodies today.
I wanna hear a mellow rhythmic beat I wanna hear happy music today I wanna cheer up!!

I don't discuss my children to much on here
but my eldest's issues are breaking my heart.

The story is long so I won't tell you all of it but he is now suffering consequences to some of his bad choices. Not being in school for the last 2 semesters has been hard. I know he needs to learn I'm all about that anyways, but he's not responding that way.

He never had too many friends he dances to a different beat than most people.

But he had this one friend his best friend who he thought would always be his friend they were thicker than thieves these two. He was known as my third son, he was apart of our family for almost 9 years.

But about five weeks ago the father of his best friend told my kid to never call his home again and from what I know for no reason other than he thinks my son is weird. We have always known this man didn't want his kid to buddy up to mine, guess he thought his asper bergs would rub off on his who effin knows. This kids parents got a divorce and he has custody now I wanted to end this friendship along time ago but I didn't, they needed each other so..... The last time he spoke to this kid was 6 weeks ago he never got to say goodbye even.. They never told him why he couldn't call back. I don't think I have ever hated anyone in my lifetime but it is hard not to with this man.

He has been thru so much a cancer scare last year surgery, getting arrested for defending himself, finding out he has a learning disability than finding out that you have OCD and asper bergs is bad enough than to loose your best friend because if it has almost devastated him.

Hes laying down and letting that bad music play over and over in his mind. I wanna shake him and tell him you can change the music huny you can. You come from a family of survivors. Fight back damn it !!!! But he wont. I have spoken to him, hugged him loved him but its doing no good.

He has seen me go thru alot, I might be down a day or two but man I get back up swinging, why cant he?? why wont he !!!! He is on meds but I told him he has to fight it too.. He goes back to the docs soon.
I feel helpless and afraid for him.

All I really want is to hear him laugh again, now that would be Music To My Ears

I had to let this out guys. My husband in his usual unemotional style is no comfort with this... He'll be alright just give him time. ( I think I have its been a month and he's not getting any better.)
I know you all have your own problems. Hope I didnt depress anyone but I gave a warning didnt I Thanks for listening.

Hugs and Peace2u all

norprin5 56M

7/6/2006 10:33 am

a happy song to play: Bob Marley - Three Little Birds

it's hard to be a kid, harder now than ever before, i think.

hugs for you and your son

King Nor XVIII

rm_madred006 47M
438 posts
7/6/2006 11:40 am

hi, shit its lovely to read u are a very caring mother i can tell dat much hope ur son can too i know its hard to watch but he is special in his own way and will react different to us hope it works out for u ,ps; ur neighbour must smell of roses the thick fuckr

angelofmercy5 60F
17881 posts
7/6/2006 11:49 am

I loved my growing up years, but I wouldn't want to be a kid now for anything. It's hard....and its even harder with jerks like this kids father around! I'll pray for you both......for the laughter to return! ~hugs~

buddhamike 107M
7006 posts
7/6/2006 11:52 am

You can change the music, but it isn't easy and you may need some help doing it. Especially when you're young. He has a big plus with a mother that truely cares. Make sure he keeps seing the doctor, one of the most common causes of problems is quitting on seeing the doctor too soon.

rm_indydirtydog 47M
700 posts
7/6/2006 1:16 pm

Wow, God love ya smooth'4u

That is so hard to deal with your kids pain and if you do not have a supporting spouse that increases the work and stress load on you. Maybe that kids dad will lighten up and let him come around. I do not have any advice other than just be there for him and encourage him like you are. It is not easy being a child and with the health problems on top of it.

Thanks for sharing

Women Women everywhere and not a pussy to eat......

horny4770 61M
8158 posts
7/6/2006 2:36 pm

Thanks for sharing that Smooth...No advise're a good Mom, you aren't gonna quit on him and you're gonna keep on loving him. I know it looks like you have your hands full now, but you'll make it!



T_A_B_75 43M

7/6/2006 3:39 pm

Life's tough and getting tougher. Just be there when he needs you. You can't protect him from everything.

Good luck.


7/6/2006 8:37 pm

Sorry to hear the news Smooth.I too have had a similier case with a neighbor but we got back in touch again later after we got much older and I joined the Marines.We still keep in contact to this day.His health isn't all that great but he keeps striving.He came to visit me when I was down at the bottom of my barrel after my son passed away and it really meant alot that a friend would travel over 600 miles to be with me at my worst possible time in my life.Even though his father didnt want us together nor did mine for that matter.We kept our friendship alive through memories and came back to each other again.Good thing too.I don't know where I would be without him sometimes nor him without me.One is for emotions while the other is for the physical strength.It will be okay Smooth.Give it time and he will see the light.Once he does,nothing will hold him back.He will fight more then all of us and come out on top.

rm_indydirtydog 47M
700 posts
7/7/2006 6:16 am

Me again...

I never have heard of Asperberger's syndrome before so I looked it up and found website and read up on it. I have some attention disorders that I have struggled with and just recently discover what was wrong with me. It sounds like AS is much more to work with, but there are more treatments and workshops these days than in my youth. I fought my ADD and became a engineer and an artist, maybe that will be some encouragement to you.

Women Women everywhere and not a pussy to eat......

smoothnjuicy4u 51F

7/7/2006 7:03 am

Everyone thanks for listening to my problems. I am truly touched by the words that you guys left. They did help. It does get tough but as long as I take it one day at a time I seem to do ok with it, its the days I get discouraged about this stuff that I get down. And that won't do him or the rest of our family any good. Thanks again, I am truly moved by the compassion and encouragement I received.

warmandsexy52 66M
13164 posts
7/8/2006 11:25 am

Hugs from the heart, sweetie. Your son needs a strong and confident male role model. Strictly speaking it ought to be his father, and a lot of "together time" is important. If his dad is unemotional and can't bring himself to do this then another role model - an uncle or friend of the family, ideally a young male adult.

Adolescent boys have a crying need for this. People with aspbergers also have a tendency to overfocus and fixate on an issue, which does make matters worse, and perhaps your son's friend's dad needs to fully understand. Many men have difficulty combining assertiveness with sensitivity, but it is by no means impossible.

I hope there's a better tune playing soon.

More hugs

warm xx

smoothnjuicy4u 51F

7/8/2006 1:00 pm

I'm gonna do my best to be there for him if he'll let me Mzhuny.
thanks or the kind words.

Warm what can I say you are always so sweet and kind, his dad does spend time with him but not enough in my opinion, right now he really needs the extra from him and my hubby just thinks I am overreacting, nothing I can do about this, I'm just gonna be there for him when he lets me be. thanks warm

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