Open house  

smartmama 59F
181 posts
12/23/2005 2:01 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Open house

I just wrote more sexual confessional, and then read it and thought, nah. Can't do this right now, here, in public, sighing about the path. So I erased it and now I sit here preparing to go out. My friend J, on his way to the airport to fly to Virginia, drops off some music and wine and some other treats, and now I must go, without my children, to M's, because really, I'd rather be tucked away from the last minute frenzy, but I must venture forth. And I have these friends who are male, and married, one, far away. A writer, this writer, who is my favorite writer and he is married and he talks about finishing his book and visiting, and I don't want him to, married genius writer that he be. I just want to dig him for years, here, safe. No flesh. No married man who I love, love...whispering sweet nothings, making me cry. Interesting. Not a bad kind of crying, more a touched kind of crying, letting down. Loving exchange so smooth, about the writing, life, and this wry Brit humor, so smart.

rm_zoro20001 43M
1 post
12/23/2005 2:36 pm

ggfhf gfh

cozy1957 60M

12/23/2005 10:18 pm

I don't know what to say but I love listening to you.
Ok, I'll say risk it, enjoy the whispers, the loving exchange, the flesh.
But what do I know??

smartmama 59F

12/26/2005 10:42 am

Cozy, yeah, well, doesn't feel like a risk. No more joy in mudville for this chickie. Right here, right now, available. As Mike Doughty, who I have been listening to for the past twenty four hours would sing..."Come and speak to me...I can be the friend you want, I can be your confidant. Stand in the light, stand in the light, stand in the light...When your faith is caked with mud, come and speak to me. When the chill creeps in your blood, seek my sympathy...mmmm. xoxo
Merry Christmas, Cozy.

dirtybird5351 66M
1 post
12/27/2005 10:10 am

Searched out your blog when someone mentioned it in chat. Liked it then but didn't have much time. Came back today with time to kill and got totally swallowed up by it. After an hour or so of reading realized it wasn't just what you had to say that was intriguing but also the fact that I envied your ability to think through and write down your feelings. I really wish I could. You have a new fan and maybe I'll find whatever it takes to look inside myself more by being a bit of a vouyer in these blogs.

smartmama 59F

12/29/2005 7:01 pm


Thanks, that is really a nice thing to say. Blogging is fun. I've been doing it on another blog for almost two years. I never know what I am going to say until I sit down and start writing. Beware, it can consume a lot of time.

redswallow777 49M
6811 posts
12/30/2005 11:33 am

Heavens, I know it can.....spent the last five hours catching up on the blogs I have been away from. Just dropped in to wish you all the best in the coming New Year.....

smartmama 59F

12/30/2005 5:52 pm

Red, thanks! Happy New Year!

I need to catch up, I plan to after the New Year.

rm_mikeman1002 46M

12/31/2005 4:44 am

Loved reading your blog. You have an amazing talent and even in a place like this it is nice to read someone so well versed. You brought a little sun to an otherwise cloudy Maine day. Have a great new year.

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