English is a crazy language........  

sincitybrunette 56F
3159 posts
7/23/2005 1:17 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

English is a crazy language........

I took a class this last week and the following is some of the literature we went over.

Enjoy: English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, ham in hamburger, neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England nor French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writes write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

P.S. Why doesn’t “Buick” rhyme with “quick”?

Funin89012 57M

7/23/2005 3:05 pm

Just a little too deep for me, babe! It goes to show that women are very complex creatures!!!! As for us men, we are very simple and have a one track mind and just think, we have two of them.

rm_connor696 61M
834 posts
7/23/2005 4:31 pm

Ya know, I started to witter on about the history of English, a Germanic language melded with Scandinavian and then overwritten by French, with borrows from all the cultures Britain decided needed to be "civilize." But where's the poetry in that? Life can be fuller if there are a few gaps left--yet another serendipitous paradox.

Cleverhands 45M
1 post
7/23/2005 4:54 pm

Don't forget all those silent letters! Do you really need to spell queue with 5 letters? Does pneumatic absolutely have to have a p upfront? Let's not forget Magdelene, pronounced maudlin and of course my favourite Featherstone-Waugh pronounced Fanshaw!

NickRules999 40M
9464 posts
7/23/2005 5:56 pm

I have to agree. It is a strange language we speak. There are many things that I can't comprehend.

Why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway?

Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?

And, one thing I have never understood, when in school I used to get in trouble for being smart. Wasn't that the idea of school? To be smart?

It's a mad, mad world.

Come into my realm! You aren't afraid...are you?

sincitybrunette 56F
1668 posts
7/23/2005 11:25 pm

harshaw - are there any more words that start with the letter "w"?

funin - whats it going to take to jolt that mind off of that one track?

connor - a few gaps?

cleverhands - silent letters will be my downfall.....lol

nick - thank you for the comment, english is probably the only language where one word, spelled the same way, can have so many different meanings.....where phrases are backwards....but what a language it is

rm_WizardTim12 51M
44 posts
7/27/2005 6:22 pm

Yes, English is fun to pick apart, and shake our heads over.

Your P.S. was probably a rhetorical question, but here's the answer.

If you pronounce Buick like quick, only with a 'B' sound in front, it sounds like Elmer Fudd saying the word 'Brick'.

And no one wants to buy a car like that

sincitybrunette 56F
1668 posts
10/17/2005 10:29 pm

wizard....you not like elmer????

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