The first time we met, I wanted to chase you naked around the house.  

sfvppl818 51M/51F
486 posts
5/25/2006 8:49 am

Last Read:
5/31/2006 7:28 pm

The first time we met, I wanted to chase you naked around the house.

You might think it odd and even be alarmed at such a suggestion, but I assure you I don't mean to imply any sexual pretenses, propositions, or the like. Not that chasing someone naked around a house doesn't come without its share of sexual connotations and questions, like where are our clothes and why am I chasing you? But it isn't so much the circumstances involved whereby I ended up perhaps darting up the stairs in your wake and diving over the couch in an effort to tackle you, as it is the momentary portrait of the chase itself.

Now you might ask why I didn't say I wanted just to chase you, which is, I must admit, a valid question, another being why I wanted to chase you in the first place, but we'll get to that shortly. If I had just said, "The first time we met, I wanted to chase you," you would probably think me some kind of deranged stalker and thus garnish my eyes with a pinch of pepper spray, kick me in my nether regions, and run like mad, all while screaming at the top of your lungs for the local authorities. Clearly that isn't a preferable outcome from my vantage, though I know not what pleasures it might bring you. No, it had to be naked, and it had to be "the house," that being "our house," not "a house," as I'm not in the habit of breaking into anonymous houses for the purposes of any sort of naked extravaganzas. Upon reflection, however, such an endeavor might not be without adrenal merit.

I think it was your eyes that did it. Your stern, reproachful words denying me the pleasure of caprice belied the hungry exhilaration barely contained by your feral gaze, leading me to an overwhelming need to chase. Naked. In the house. There's a certain shrieking laughter you'll emit in a proper chase, a delicious amalgam of delight, fear, and excitement that can pierce the sky with blazing rapture and light a whole night through. That is to say the general you, not you in particular, though I would hope you in particular adhere to the generality or all of this is written in vain.

There's no guarantee of such an event if you're outside and dressed, though I readily grant that there's no definite guarantee naked in the house, either, but I have to assume, however, that if you're already naked, since I certainly didn't undress you -- not without consent, anyway -- the chances of you evoking aforementioned shriek are vastly superior to those if I were to, say, chase you clothed through a park. The public arena comes with its own inherent safety net, as help is always just a yell away if things were to get out of hand, not that things would ever get out of hand as I have only the best of intentions in mind. But with no trees to hide behind and no buildings to dodge into, the boundaries elevate the chase to a level unattainable via any conditions that might be found external to the house.

Furthermore, I don't think it would be prudent to chase you naked through a park -- even if it were one of those special types of parks with which I have no desire to familiarize myself -- as being publicly acknowledged as a sex offender does not rank highly on my to-do list. Again, though, this isn't about sex. Ok, so there would probably be some sex involved; after all, we're already naked, so it stands to reason that we may as well take advantage of the situation. But please understand that sex isn't the point; the point is the path we took to get there, and I don't mean up the stairs and over the couch. Clearly if we're so comfortable as to be able to chase one another naked around the house we must have quite the sound and healthy relationship.

I hope you can understand then that my first reaction upon meeting you was not only reasonable but also admirable, if not a tad tantalizing and intriguing. Surely I could have expressed my sentiments through some alternate means, but how could I have been true to you or myself without having conveyed such an incisive initial reaction to our meeting. So, as it stands, I am still wholly committed to and enamored by the thought of chasing you naked around the house, and I dearly hope to hear from you and not your lawyers.


PS - Is it okay that I am a woman and want to chase you with a nail gun?

PSS - Hey, I know there are better things to chase with besides a nail gun. Okay, Mr AdultFriendFinder referee loser! We know already! You are the type of freak who stays past "The End" in a movie theater because the credits actually mean something to you! Please get laid and save yourself the agony of applying logic to AdultFriendFinder blogs.

moo_nips 58F

5/25/2006 4:29 pm

being enamored by things is a definite reaction based upon ex-wifey things...the only one I ever knew who ever got enamored

since you explore the sometimes implorable, it would be a quite interesting study as to why a gender-chalenged person totally bought off on all your profile descriptions (and wanted to do this and that...emotions building)...........until...the enamored word popped into play and thus imortalized...and all that is to say: I would love to give a sincere kiss into your direction if you had not been "enamoured"....a good psyc profile i enamored woman should be easy to least giving a smile

sfvppl818 replies on 5/25/2006 7:35 pm:
Are you always this challenged with defining gender specific roles? Somewhere between Erica Jong on amphetamines, Helen Reddy's "I am Woman" at deafening volume, and then careful analysis of the DSM IV .. right about where Borderline Personality Disorder and OCD exist, I think you will arrive at the point of your own alter-ego.

Like most of us rationalize while scarfing down a hot pocket and Cherry Coke.

Actually this is satire, and I am normally a quiet woman who takes her work seriously. I still can't understand how any of this is real to anyone!

walkinatmidnight 57M

5/25/2006 7:03 pm

1. A power-tool is not a toy.

2. Where did you get the X-ray of my skull?

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