rm_taterbug1957 60M
1 posts
7/26/2006 9:40 pm

Last Read:
7/29/2006 2:56 am


Several months ago my son had some friends over. They were from out of town an I did`nt know them. That evening I noticed something that bothered me but did not say anything until his friends had gone. That next day I asked my son why he and this new friend of his a young man his age 18 were sitting on the floor in his room with their legs entangled together. He admitted to me that he was Bi-sexual. WOW, I said; do you even realize what that means? You are a young man whom I raised as a christian. You are aware of what that means I know b\c I`ve raised U as a single parent since kindergarten.I was shocked! He became very angry with me an said he knew that I would never understand, an that he did not care what I thought, an that a lot of his friends,(new friends I did`nt know) said it was ok. I asked him if he thought some of his old friends and family including myself would think that way? We had a big argument,I told him that I could not condone such behaver in my home. He said; "Thats fine I was going to leave anyway". He got some things together an left with me pleading with him not to leave an to stay and talk about this an his future. He was attending Jr. college at the time. I became very emotional that night an for the next several days,b\c he had not returned to school. I was beside myself to say the least. What had I done wrong? Could I have been a better father?WHERE WAS HE? WAS HE HUNGRY SOMEWHERE?WAS HE HURT?I searched everywhere, asked everyone if they knew where he was.When he called about a week later all I could say was I loved him very much. He had moved to Baton Rouge an was ok he said. He is 19 now, has an apartment,a job an we have visited several times,talk regularly on the phone.He knows I have a problem with this choice to live this way but we are able to talk a little about it occasionally. He says everyone down here is ok with it but someone spray painted his car one night with red paint. I find myself worrying about him in other ways now I never imagined;hate crimes,aids, etc.. . I here more an more about young kids today doing all sorts of things when it comes to sexual exploration. I don`t know? As a father an straight in the sexual sense I just want to tell him to grow up an be a man, but at this time I really don`t know what to do. I don`t want to alienate myself from him I love him to much. I could not bear the thought of not knowing about how he is doing,or talking to him. I`m going to see him this weekend to fix his car which wont crank. I`ve been a mechanic all my life an he dos`nt trust anyone to work on his car but me, he says. Am I doing anything wrong? Has anyone had any experience in such a matter? WHAT IS A FATHER TO DO?

LostLady1973 44F
51 posts
7/26/2006 10:26 pm


Love your child above all other things.

You can dislike his choices, but the moment that you put his choice of sexuality as a wall between the two of you, you will find it's a wall that does not come down easily.

Accept him. Love him. Don't wear it as a badge of shame upon your heart.


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