OK, Now I've Had It!  

rm_talldarkavg1 106M
posts
6/22/2005 7:35 am
OK, Now I've Had It!

Seems the muckety mucks at Wimbeldon are now thinking of enacting rules governing the amount of noise a tennis player may utter during a match. They feel the female athletes are grunting far too much when hitting shots, and that noise level is just unacceptable.

Where do I begin? First off, what is too much noise? Is there a finely tuned hi-tech Grunt-O-Meter? Personally, I enjoyed female grunts. Hell, I even enjoyed the grunts Porky's car horn made when chasing those wacky Angel Beach teens.

Secondly, this whole prima donna thing with tennis player irks me too. You can't make noise. No jeering, no booing, no nothing. Absolute silence is decorum. Since when do we kiss an athlete's butt? Ever watch a foul shot in the NBA? People wave balloons, flash boobies, scream, and there's that occasional sniper fire. Football too. Lots of noise.

So why do we have to remain silent and sit motionless for tennis butt munches? I say let's change the rules indeed. OK, I'll keep my yap shut during a tennis match, but make the players wear clown feet. Now there's a visual. This rule makes the game better for the spectator as well. Sure there's going to be some falling down and major-league tripping, but come on. It really isn't a sport unless there's a noogie or two and some bleeding is it?

That way they have a bit of a handicap like all other athletes. Wait a minute...those golf creeps. There's another bunch of elitist cool clothes wearing silence demanders.

Silence when you hit a ball? Think about golf for a minute. You hit a ball, spend 7 minutes walking up to where it landed, spend another 20 minutes finding it, then what? You hit it again. Stupid. No talking when these finely tuned athletes work either.

Again, I'll keep my yap shut but make the golfers wear a blindfold. That evens things up a bit. Also, this rule adds the probability of someone in the gallery getting beaned with the ball. Let's face it, is there anything funnier than seeing a golf ball bounce off someone's head? See there, another win-win proposition.

What are your thoughts?


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rm_affbreak 47M
287 posts
6/22/2005 8:30 am

I think it's all about seeing Anna Kournikova drooling thru some fancy BSDM gag during a match!


rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/22/2005 11:06 am

OK...gags can be madatory too. I love a gag order!

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rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/22/2005 3:43 pm

Nancy...we can be married now.

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mi_mwpm 52M

6/22/2005 5:49 pm

Let me add... racing on oval tracks... how hard can it be to go fast and turn left? Hell, in Michigan we have to dodge potholes, deer, and, occasionally, turn right without spilling a drop of our Super Big Gulp. I say we release a rabbit between laps 50 and 100, call 'em on the cell phone and play a tape of a screaming three year old and see if those guys can really drive.


rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/23/2005 5:41 am

LMAO mi mwpm...in the upcoming campaign...I think I just found the Minister of the Interior!

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rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/23/2005 12:08 pm

Naked football. Hmm, seems we'd have to clearly identify the illegal use of the hands penalty.

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rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/23/2005 12:09 pm

I did propose, but who can blame her...she didn't answer.

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rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
6/28/2005 10:46 am

Oops, maybe she did.

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rm_talldarkavg1 106M
10172 posts
7/1/2005 9:04 am

She did

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stardust81937 80M
8336 posts
5/14/2010 2:13 pm

I doubt you'll ever find this buried way back here at the beginning of your blogs, but hey, what the heck. Thanks for visiting my blog.

Oh, I almost forgot. I think ALL of those involved in commercial sports of all kinds, are idiots.


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