Assistance...where?  

rm_onetyger 46F
24 posts
5/5/2006 2:59 pm

Last Read:
5/13/2006 4:20 am

Assistance...where?


I had a bad day. Better now, but it took awhile. Here's how I was feeling this morning.

"I'm trying to figure out how the fuck anyone is supposed to get help when they've been . The night it happened to me I tried calling crisis hotlines and couldn't get answers or they were closed. I even called the police to ask them for a number, and that one didn't answer. A couple days later, I called my doctor and they told me to go to the ER...so I did. The fucking ER wouldn't even see me and tried to send me to yet another hospital. Needless to say, it took all the strength that I had for me to even go to the first hospital, only to be turned away. Screw going somewhere else!

I finally got an appointment for std testing, after 6 weeks...still waiting for those results which I should get next week. I think I'm okay, but just want to be sure, ya know? The gynecologist referred me to a therapist that is more than 40 miles away. Umm, excuse me, but have you seen gas prices lately, and when am I gonna find the time to go that far in the middle of a move and when I work?

So, now that I'm having flashbacks and nightmares more and more every day after 7 weeks, I can't get a damn appointment with a therapist who lives closer because they don't answer their phones til after 9am and I can't very well discuss this out loud from my desk after other people get to work. Grrr....so, now I'm back to just needing to cry all night and have someone just hold me and let me get it out of my system. I've had plenty of offers from women to let me do that, but no men. Guess they can't handle it. And no offense to the women...I appreciate the offers. But, there's just something about wanting the safety of a man's arms.

I thought I was a strong woman, but this has brought me to my knees, literally. I am not the type to ask for help. So, when I do ask, it means that I need it then. I feel like such a fucking wimp and weakling...and that is just not who I am. Granted, in some ways this has made me tougher, but in other ways it has left me scarred. After almost 2 months, why the hell can't I get past this? I just don't get it.

I am just so pissed off about this whole thing. How are other women who need help supposed to get it? And more than that....they shouldn't have a reason to even need it in the first place. Now I know why there aren't more people who report . Even if you try, you can't get any help."

GossipJunkie 41F

5/11/2006 7:18 pm

I tried to post once and the damn computer froze up...
It takes a great amount of strength to go on and survive/exist after something like this happens. And to have to deal with the extra crap that you're going through shows you have that much more strength in you.
I did a search based on your disclosed location of Charlotte, NC and found this online: http://AdultFriendFinder.com
I hope it helps.

GossipJunkie
"Dance like nobody's watching"


GossipJunkie 41F

5/12/2006 9:43 am

I Googled " Crisis Charlotte NC" and got my result. Hopefully, they won't edit this comment too.

GossipJunkie
"Dance like nobody's watching"


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