IS TALKING TO OTHER MAN CHEATING  

rm_olgab72 45F
6 posts
4/7/2006 9:23 am

Last Read:
10/15/2006 10:38 am

IS TALKING TO OTHER MAN CHEATING

HAVE A FRIEND IN NEW YORK THAT I TALK TO EVERYDAY AND WE GET ALONG VERY GOOD WE HAD IN SOME OCCASIONS HAD PHONE SEX. BOYFRIEND FOUND THIS OUT AND NOW HE ACCUSE ME OF CHEATING HAVE I CHEATED ON HIM BY JUST TALKING OR IS HE JUST BEEN A JERK ABOUT MY FRIENDSHIP WITH OTHER MAN?


imLadyBambi 59M/51F

4/8/2006 8:50 pm

Hmmm, quite a complex question and the answer varies from couple to couple. Having said that, the rule of thumb is:

1) It is not cheating if it does not violate any of the boundaries that are implied or agreed to in your relationship. AND

2) It is not cheating if you did not try to hide or conceal your actions.

Assuming you met the criteria above, what you have here is simply a case of misunderstanding. What you need to do now is compromise. Perhaps you can continue to keep your close relationship with the NY friend in exchange for the understanding that you will not have phone sex with anyone else. Let's face it, what is done is done and its not like the guy in NY had a dick that can reach you here in TX.

Lady Bambi


rm_olgab72 45F

4/13/2006 10:40 am

well thank you i totaly agree with you


rm_keepitonhush 40M
1 post
7/26/2006 9:02 pm

"is it cheating", well all I can say is that it may as well have been real sex with the guy on the phone, but ONLY if it was Him you were imagining in your mind while you were doing it. It is only something to regret if you feel ashamed or wrong about it. Whether you SHOULD feel bad about it is not the question to ask. The question to ask is "Do you feel bad about it?" Cuz, if casual sex with a good friend isn't something that bothers you then cheating or not, if you are fine with it, then fuckit, only you know what you want and we only live once. Why not live a happy fulfilled life.
Your profile and your photos are sooo Hott that, personally I wouldn't feel a bit of remorse about having a 'lil naughty fun on the phone with you!


MalePsycheNurse 59M
1 post
2/18/2007 1:05 pm

I think the only question here is: Do you feel you have been unfaithful to your boyfriend? That answer to this question is the same as the answer to your original question. You boyfriend should consider himself lucky that you have been open about what was going on. If you were trying to hide it from him you probably felt like you were cheating. I would, I think, be okay with someone I was dating to engage in "Phone sex" (how do you have sex with a phone.?...I know, I am just saying I would rather have the real thing) as long as they had said there were thinking about it and then I might even encourage it. It doesn't matter to me where they get their inspiration from as long as they don't engage it outside of our relationship. It occurs to me that the act itself might loose some of it's appeal if it weren't somehow wrong. Like having sex in a public place. The idea of maybe getting caught adds to the excitement, same with the phone sex incident. The fact that your boyfriend might find out and not like it was a real turn on for you. I am assuming, of course. If you have gotten this far and your boyfriend has been foolish enough to have left you I am putting in my request that we chat to see if you might be interested in exploring a bit further. I'm just saying I would be interested if you are not with someone. I wouldn't want to add stress to the situation. I hope it has worked out to your satisfaction. Take care.
Later,
Donald


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