Plastic surgery - what would you change?  

rm_kelli4u2dew 42F
7028 posts
5/7/2006 5:17 pm

Last Read:
5/17/2006 10:12 pm

Plastic surgery - what would you change?

First off, I'm not contemplating going under the knife.

One of my fetishes is a subscription to Playboy. I get it for the articles. Really!! Ladies, there is an article in the June 2006 issue that you HAVE to read. I laughed my ass off!

The article was written by a woman, and the topic is vaginoplasty. That's right, tuck jobs for the pussy! You too can have your asymemetrical labia evened up! Slim your mons pubis! Trim your clitoral hood! Create the "perfect pussy"!!!

I thought getting a bikini wax was vain!

A woman was quoted in the article as saying that one of her inner lips was longer than the other, and it always made her feel insecure. The writer had pretty much the same reaction I did. WHAT? You noticed that? How much time do you spend sqatting over a mirror?

Another new procedure is called ... (drum roll please) ...

G-spot enhancement! (Patent pending under the trade name G-Shot). This doctor in (of course) Beverly Hills is shooting collagen into women's G spots. Swells up, makes it easier to find, enhances pleasure! Of course, it costs $1800 and you have to get it redone every 4 months or so, but hell, what else are you spending your money on? Food, shelter? Clothes for the kids? Pshaw ...

Ladies, in case you wonder if you should read the article, here's one quote, "Listen to Matlock (the Beverly Hills doctor) long enough and it wouldn't surprise you if the smog of Los Angeles should part to reveal a giant holographic pussy hanging in the sky, the words DAVID MATLOCK, COOTER KING! wafting from its glistening lips." ROFLMAO!!!

The coup de grace, of course, is hymenoplasty. Recreation of your hymen so someone can deflower you again. I'd heard of this before, but didn't know that it cost between $1800-$5000. Personally, it hurt a bit too much the first time for me to want to do it again, but to each her own.

So, I read this article, laughing the whole time, but, well, you know, we're all a bit insecure. I pick up the phone.

Blue, do you think my pussy looks normal?

Huh? I mean ... uh ... honey, you have a very nice pussy.

Thank you, but that's not what I mean. I mean, does it look normal, like other women's pussys. How does it compare?

I don't know what 'normal' is. Every woman's pussy looks just a bit different, and yet they all look pretty much the same. You've looked at other women's pussys, right?

Well, yeah, but I really never studied one, except W's, cause that was my first one, you know, other than mine.

Kel, what the hell is this about? What are you asking me? Do I think your pussy looks like the bride of frankenstein or something? It looks like a perfectly normal pussy on a pretty young lady.

Blue, well, have you seen the new Playboy?

Laughter erupts out of the phone. He laughs so hard he can't talk, can't breathe. He gets the hiccups. He has to hang up and call me back.

Ten minutes later, still chuckling, he does. Tells me that I don't need plastic surgery, and neither does any other woman he's ever gone down on.

So, if you had unlimited money, is there anything about yourself you would change? Vaginoplasty, rhinoplasty, tuck job, boob job, hair replacement ... ???

Or are you happy with yourself? Do you ever wonder if changing your outer appearance would change your life? Your sex life?

Inquiring minds want to know ... LOL!!!

Picture is before and after

JazzDlight 60F

5/7/2006 5:47 pm

Oh hell no...nobody sees mine anyway. I am such a wuss...just getting my ears pierced was a big deal. There are many things I would like to change though but not this. LMAO I like your blog by the way and your photo. Jazz

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 8:53 pm:
Thanks for stopping by!

RevJoseyWales 70M/67F
14393 posts
5/7/2006 5:48 pm

Unfortunately Kel, physical appearance counts for so much in life that of course enhancements would improve the overall quality of life, and make MAJOR improvement to one's sex life. That being said, , I'll stay just as I am thank you. I ain't much, but at least I'm paid for. Joe

"McVeigh had the right idea, wrong address."

"This ain't Dodge City, and you ain't Bill Hickok."

caressmewell 54F

5/7/2006 5:56 pm

If I had unlimited money I would get a tummy tuck (hey, I had 2 kids) a bit of liposuction here and there and maybe and eye lift (I'm not real sure about that one).

No surgery on the cooter...ROFL..I can't say that I am insecure in that particular area!

Cowboy_Deluxe 39M

5/7/2006 5:58 pm

Actually for the inquiring! I think that we are what we are. I like a woman to be natural..well shave dammit..I don't like leg hairs or pit hairs...but other than that...I like messy hair, no makeup..and a naked woman. Next to me.

I am..yes call me the inside..the intelligence the sexuality that lady describes in her words, and it shows everytime no matter what they write about. Cause no matter if we change our outsides, that doesn't mean anything. If I had a lot of money? I would spend it on a woman. On moments that could create something special..yes everytime.

rm_PeanutJackie 37F
1286 posts
5/7/2006 6:06 pm

I'd get lipo and tummy tuck. Doing the weight-loss and work out thing just takes way too long to see results. I am a very impatient person. I want to see results fast. Unfortunately the only way to really do that is with surgery. I'd consider getting a breast lift too, because they're starting to sag. I definitely wouldn't do anything to my face. I see no reason to. The same applies to 'down below'

"I am beautiful no matter what you say, words can't bring me down. So don't you bring me down today."

007sexy40plus 52F  
7603 posts
5/7/2006 6:07 pm

I have had a plastic surgery procedure and It was the tummy tuck in 2003. Three Children and all were C-sections. So that was the best money I ever spent. Would do it again if I had too. But if I had extra money for anything else. I would get some lipo(thighs)(the newest technique) and maybe an extra cup on the boobs. I am a C want to be a D. But that is all. No face lifts, nose jobs, and No coochie beautifications either.

I am the real deal! "Come Get Me!!!"

rm_LilBlondeNZ 42F
1028 posts
5/7/2006 6:24 pm

OMG... the *whole* list? Oh, forget it! it might be easier just to keep a few parts of me and glue them onto somebody else.


rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 8:41 pm:
Now THAT made me smile.

GossipJunkie 41F

5/7/2006 6:35 pm

I had a tummy tuck after having two kids. Like 007Sexy says: best money every spent. The tummy is flat which makes it easier to buy clothes. Now if I could just lose that extra 20lbs.

"Dance like nobody's watching"

digdug41 50M

5/7/2006 7:27 pm

I'm goin out the way i came in au natural but I'm a guy so I guess that wouldn't be unheard of

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

MyRealLoverOne 47M

5/7/2006 7:55 pm

I think my left dudadicle hangs down a little further than the right maybe a nut-tuck!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 8:40 pm:
I thought they all were like that ... a new market! LOL!

carebearluv2 43F

5/7/2006 8:13 pm

Cooter surgery?!! LMAO!

I have no plans to have plastic surgery but if I ever did, I would have a tummy tuck, lipsuction all over and a breast reduction. I would also like to have the bags removed under my eyes and veneers on my teeth.

By the way, Blue is a very lucky guy!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 8:39 pm:
I keep telling him that!

rm_macallan4u 47M
968 posts
5/7/2006 9:02 pm

My friends a plastic surgeon and he tells me I could never imagine how many vaginoplasty he does! Personally, I think my left earlobe needs a tuck... Don't laugh!

danteszippo 53M
4065 posts
5/7/2006 9:08 pm

I was thinking of having some flames tattooed on my cock. give it that rebel look.

reverend21 50M
1913 posts
5/7/2006 9:55 pm

I'm not sure if it is considered plastic surgeory or not, but the only procedure I would have done, I the permanant removal of the facail and neck hair I normally shave. i know you ladies shave your legs, and go through unspeakable torture to makes yourselves more attractive in your own eyes, but shaveing has to be one of the greatest chores and tortures at the same time.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/7/2006 10:36 pm:
That's simple! Grow a beard!

Nightguy_1961 56M
4866 posts
5/7/2006 11:41 pm

I would have the scars removed from my face......

NG61...fading back into the shadows...

sickofthegames 42M
33 posts
5/7/2006 11:49 pm

I don't have to worry about any of that I'm perfect already ROFLMAO

GoddessOfTheDawn 106F
11240 posts
5/8/2006 1:03 am

I think I'm with LIblonde for the first part...

gud post

TabithaElectra79 39F

5/8/2006 2:29 am

I think I'd have loads of little things done, like face peels, botox etc! I'd be too scared to have anything big done, and I'd never do anything like that article!

Babel__Fish 46F

5/8/2006 4:09 am


I did not know that they could change all those things..... I would NOT want it done to me.... I think that it would really hurt and what do you do when you have to pee?


rm_FreeLove999 47F
16127 posts
5/8/2006 4:58 am

i so wish i could lose weight, but i would NEVER go the surgery route. plastic surgery for pussies sounds like a stand up comedy routine...! when i first moved left into socialism (i'm further left than socialism, communism and anarchism now ), my husband belonged to this socialist organisation the head of which made out that consumerism would eventually reach a natural end -- there'd be nothing left to buy. i realised long ago that was utter bullshit -- and this really confirms that!

[blog freelove999]

rm_gorilla062 51M
232 posts
5/8/2006 5:50 am

OMG!! I think I am feeling insecure about myself... I think... yeah that's it I think I will get the wrinkles taken out of my balls!!!

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/8/2006 10:57 pm:
Please, don't leave comments while I'm drinking. It takes up valuable blogging time to clean the computer after my beer shoots through my nose ...

rm_Rico0825 56M
483 posts
5/8/2006 7:12 am

I am currently loosing weight. Refuse to call it a diet, cause it has to be a new way of life. Not to be buff, but to be healthy. And my doctor says when all is said and done, after all the walking and ab crunches, I probably will need some surgery to remove the stretched out skin. Already moved some money into a 9 month CD to pay for it if needed. That's my time at least!!! LOL

But of course all you ladies like tall men, so my dream would be at least 6' tall.

OrionsAdventures 39M

5/8/2006 9:09 am

for joke people ask me all the time If I could give them a few inchs of my self seeing that I'm 6'4" but I wouldn't have anything done. If I think I have a few pounds to loose I'll do it the old fasion way with allot of exercise. Just call me old fasion but I believe it's better being fit then plastic And hey the most beautiful women are curvy even if the magazines say it's the Popsicle Stick Ladies that are in demande lollll

doyawantahuh 55M

5/8/2006 1:25 pm

Add a little hair to my slowing balding head!!!

Other wise, very satisfied!!

I can't imagine a thing done on you WHEW!!

papyrina 52F
21133 posts
5/8/2006 2:35 pm

boobs,boobs and more boobs well from an exquistantly small 34A it would be nice to go back to a C lol every time i lose weight another bit comes off there and if i was really into it then a bit of lipo from my thighs,save all those butt and thigh exercises,and if i could really afford it i would lazer away all body hair

I'm a

i'm here to stay

waerlookin4fun 51M/47F

5/8/2006 10:50 pm

Nope wouldn't change anything, as for the pussy procedures.......has no one ever heard of kegals? I have had a nose job, but it was done because I couldn't breathe while running mile relays in track and it just happened to straighten out my nose

RoyalPurpleRose 53F

5/8/2006 11:07 pm

The only thing I have ever considered changing is my teeth. I'd like to have them straightened. My parents could never afford braces. And I'd like to have implants of a missing molar. But as for the rest ... no. I am what I am.

This article sounds hilarious. I will have to pick up a copy of this mag just to read this article. Thanks Kelli.

~Kisses, RPR

rm1973 45M

5/9/2006 5:21 pm

I'd probably have that third nut removed...always seems to be getting in the way...

loverboy1233 40M

5/9/2006 9:45 pm

If I had all the money in the world it still wouldn't help me, there is no cure for ugliness, so you just have to exist till your time comes....

BuglingBull 58M/53F

5/10/2006 6:19 am

"I yam what I yam" Popeye the Sailor. What is left to change and then again how would anyone know it was changed. I will have to take a more detailed look the next time I go muff diving. LMAO

StaynHardnHot 43M
305 posts
5/11/2006 8:14 am

Not having been lucky enough for an upclose view like Blue and merely relying on photos...i would have to say dont mess with perfection dear.. Kisses...Chris

Gypsy329 47F

5/14/2006 6:51 pm

Overall, I'm pretty happy with myself. Yeah, I could stand to lose a little weight and I've got theses light stretch marks left from having my daughter but still I think I look pretty fuckin great...

But if u find a natural way to make my boobs grow that ain't gonna break the bank...let me know...I'm so there.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/17/2006 10:14 pm:
My mom always calls stretch marks "racing stripes" (she's a gynecologist). She says it proves that you have a love life.

rm_gfpowell 54

5/17/2006 9:17 pm

Oh thats just to funny. You have a great sense of humor.

jst4fun915 35F

5/17/2006 9:54 pm

There are a few things I'd have done, such as rhinoplasty, a tummy tuck (I have stretched out skin from carrying twins) and maybe a breast lift, but certainly not until I can comfortably afford it, and even then only with much research and consideration. However, these vaginal tucks and such are just craziness. You're messing with a very sensitive area, I'd be afraid something would get messed up!! Then again, I've seen some "roast beef" pussies, and if mine looked like that I might feel differently about the topic.

rm_kelli4u2dew replies on 5/17/2006 10:16 pm:
No matter how good the surgeon, there is a chance that something can go wrong.

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