God's Two Gifts  

rm_gerson42 53M
1752 posts
6/10/2006 1:16 pm

Last Read:
6/11/2006 10:41 pm

God's Two Gifts

One day, in the Garden of Eden, God came down to Adam and Eve to bestowe upon them the final gifts of mankind.

God, with his great and allmighty voice, boomed through the heavens...

ADAM - bring your mate here to me, that I may give you items of great joy...

Adam called to Eve and bade her come, and the two ran to God and said, "Oh Lord, we are here. What kind gift have you for us oh Lord Most High?"

And God spoke saying:

I have TWO gifts - the first: One of you may have the ability to urinate whilst standing

Adam quickly responded, "OOH! OOH! OOH! ME ME ME!!!"

Very Well!

* * * * * * *Lightning Strikes* * * * * * *

Adam runs to a tree to test his newfound power. Eve says to God - "And what of me oh Lord?"

Hmm? ... Oh, yes... the... OTHER gift... what was it now... AH! Here we are - Multiple Orgasms!

gerson42 - but my friends can call me Ger

waerlookin4fun 51M/47F

6/10/2006 3:25 pm

Oh my, that is too funny

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:03 pm:
Hey, why is it so funny. I don't get it.

sexyariesgirl 59F

6/10/2006 3:29 pm

Isn't that just like a man?? lol

Power To FOK

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:04 pm:
Yes it is. We just can't help ourselves... or is that we do help ourselves... just first?

TheRealThing655 49F
9558 posts
6/10/2006 3:36 pm

I guess that's a fair trade-off, lol.

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:05 pm:
Somehow I gotta make this work with the previous toilet seat posts. lol

southrnpeach333 52F

6/10/2006 4:17 pm

And, boy, do i love my gift...over and over and over...and....

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:06 pm:
I'm hearing what you're sayin, but I gotta couple of posts that may help dispell... just need to get the courage up.

Seriously_Real 49M

6/10/2006 5:25 pm

dude, we got screwed...and not in a good way...


rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:06 pm:
After all the activity on your recent posts you have nothing to say on this. lol

ProtonicMan 49M

6/10/2006 5:58 pm

Oh, so Adam is the SOB to blame for that! When I meet him in heaven, I'm sooo gonna kick his ass!


rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:07 pm:
Something tells me you don't need to kick Adam's ass.

OboesHonedIambs 63F

6/10/2006 6:53 pm

I like our feminine share of the gift just fine, thankyewveddymuch!

Instant Human -- Just Add Coffee

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:08 pm:
... and I like to help the feminine gender enjoy their gifts.

nottycara 37F

6/10/2006 7:06 pm

I still religiously thank the Lord for His gift to me and my kind. I mean.. i gotta be grateful for being able to call out "Ohhh God this is so good" more than 3 times a day... daily basis..

Naughty cara

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:09 pm:
I am hearing you. Don't want you to think men can't do so also. More to come.

rm_cru1972 46M
4407 posts
6/10/2006 7:58 pm

I guess I'm the lucky one for I have had two multiple orgasms, and I can pee standing up

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:09 pm:
yeah, but you're a different breed. You don't count in the statistics.

PurplePeach72 45F  
9199 posts
6/10/2006 8:00 pm

That's what you boys get for being such eager beavers, but obviously at some point Adam went back to God whining that he got short changed because we also got stuck with periods and child bearing. The multiple orgasms make up for a lot but having endured natural childbirth, one might wonder...hmmm
Great joke. I'm going to go use my gift now thanks!


rm_gerson42 replies on 6/10/2006 11:10 pm:
hey, don't ruin a good joke with reality like that. lol Glad you're going to enjoy yourself. over and over again.


6/10/2006 11:49 pm

Guess thats why ya all learned those neat tricks like writing your name in the snow While we....well YOU know


just a squirrel trying to get a nut

rm_gerson42 53M
2419 posts
6/11/2006 12:59 am

Dammit Mo, how do you come up with stuff that cracks me up but makes me look silly?

curious082385 32F
4925 posts
6/11/2006 1:27 am

And what an awesome gift it is too...

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/11/2006 11:17 am:
Well, I guess if one of the two genders should get the gift...

LustyTaurus 50M
21253 posts
6/11/2006 1:27 am

mmm...I REALLY, REALLY like writing my name in the snow, and theres always Viagra!!...

Funny post ger...TY

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/11/2006 11:17 am:
I always wanted to try that, think it will work in the sand?

HBowt2 60F

6/11/2006 5:04 am

now that explains my religious tendencies.....ohhhhhhh god........yesssss.......god yessssssssssssssss.......you wanna pray with me some time....lol

rm_gerson42 replies on 6/11/2006 11:18 am:
We gotta give religion credit for more than just making us feel guilty. lol

GermanGirl_000 64F

6/11/2006 5:43 pm

It's a great gift for sure.


rm_gerson42 replies on 6/11/2006 6:13 pm:
... yet men can have the same results... stay tuned germangirl.

ArtisticTwist75 42F
2505 posts
6/11/2006 9:13 pm

Gotta love a woman's gift... you can pee however you want I don't care ... I'll keep my multiples thank you very much.


rm_gerson42 replies on 6/11/2006 10:43 pm:
Thank you for reading my posts in reverse order... however... hah... men can have the multiples also. We just don't have the discipline.

wickedeasy 68F  
31350 posts
6/13/2006 6:49 am

too bad God didn't teach y'all to aim.................

You cannot conceive the many without the one.

ButteryDelight 60F

6/22/2006 5:26 am

Ger..you forgot another gift..that of "Flow Measurement"...the You know what I mean..the "lets see how far our stream goes off a bridge"..... ( <<< Has 6 brothers )


Buttery Delight

Become a member to create a blog