Be Nice To One Another  

rm_gerson42 53M
1752 posts
7/20/2006 8:31 pm

Last Read:
7/25/2006 10:41 am

Be Nice To One Another

Damn, once again I got myself behind on keeping up with my fellow bloggers thoughts and lives and am enjoying catching up. Yet, this time... as I was exploring Blogville... it seemed to me that politeness and respect seemed to be lacking in a few areas and locations.

Might I offer a few words as a reminder of appropriate and polite interaction? Ok good, thank you.

My qualifications for offering the following words comes from time spent as a School Board President for 6 years. Occasionally, I would open a meeting that contained a contreversial and potentially explosive topic to a standing room only audience of parents who only wanted what was best for their children. Often this audience would be at odds with each other or the school administration's placing on the agenda a new policy or change.

With the advance knowledge that at no time in a situation like this that at anytime would everyone be happy, I often opened with a little reminder or speech that contained elements that would appeal to the better nature of people.

We are all citizens of the same community, in this instance, it is Blogville. People respond as mirrors and by nature mirrors reflect and/or increase the intensity of the image provided. As a community, this is counter productive to a healthy and happy place to communicate with one another. Unless we all work together while communicating respectfully, we only hurt one another, ourselves and diminish the quality of our community. No good will come from emotionally charged rants or negative communication to a person or problem. Solutions only come from respectful conversation and the ability to conduct oneself appropriately. The end goal is common yet the opinions and solutions on how to get there may differ. This is the process through which the best solutions only come from appropriate behavior.

Communication is not a one-way process. There must be a “sender” and a “receiver.” Sometimes, in our zeal to “send” our message out to others, we forget that the message is being “received” by persons whose zeal, goals, and concerns may block the flow of communication.

The best way for a sender to motivate a receiver to listen to a message is to show how the message will benefit the receiver. When the receiver, in turn, demonstrates understanding of the sender’s interest and point of view, genuine communication can occur.

Things to keep in mind;
Being polite and courteous;
Thinking before acting;
Thinking about how the other person might be feeling;
Listening to what others have to say;
Using common sense;
Thinking about how you would feel if someone you respected found out about your conduct; and
Acting responsibility for your conduct and the consequences of your conduct.

Please feel free if you want to share any or all of this with anyone.


Closing notes.

My Mother always said If you don't have something nice or constructive to say, don't say it at all.

Recognize that we are not all alike
Ensure expectations are clear
Seek to be inclusive
Project a positive outlook
Explore other’s viewpoints
Communicate for understanding
Treat others as they wish to be treated

gerson42 - but My friends can call me ger

Seriously_Real 49M

7/20/2006 10:02 pm

Must be something in the air. It's the heat, you know, that does it every time.

I have another favorite quote, and it's mine: "If you don't know what you don't know, then you don't know all you need to know."


rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 12:24 pm:
Wise words drawn in mask man. Maybe people should only post in the cool of the morning.

rm_AnOddGirl 58F
3469 posts
7/20/2006 10:45 pm

Do No Harm
Be Excellent to Each Other
Party On!

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 12:25 pm:
More good words to live by, especially the part on. lol

frangipanigal 46F
10406 posts
7/20/2006 11:13 pm

Yes Sir,

And if I don't "play nice" what happens then?? Jjust being cheeky! It's the lack of red meat in my diet!

Frangi x

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:00 pm:
You get an exception to playing nice. hehe

curious082385 32F
4925 posts
7/21/2006 3:17 am

I don't understand what happened. Just all of a sudden, people started being snappy with each other and saying mean things. It didn't seem to have started anywhere in particular...maybe just the tension and stress that we all seem to have been under in the last two months.
I have read several posts like yours...I hope more people read them and take them to heart.

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:02 pm:
I'd rather write the words above then participate in negativity. Like Seriously said, it's probably the heat.

sexyariesgirl 58F

7/21/2006 5:20 am

EXCELLENT post! Thank you.....

Power To FOK

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:02 pm:
....and thank you for the compliment. Gonna come visit your blog in a second.

wickedeasy 68F  
30939 posts
7/21/2006 6:34 am

well said

ps - can i steal the man jokes? want to send them to my brothers - and then sit back and wait for the explosion


You cannot conceive the many without the one.

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:04 pm:
The man jokes are absolutely yours to torture your brothers with.

TheRealThing655 49F
9558 posts
7/21/2006 7:02 am

Very well said. I can't help but think if people outside of the Blogs read this...maybe more marriages wouldn't end in divorce???

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:10 pm:
Seems that good commication skills and proper form cross over all over the place. How are you?

NSAAddict 43F

7/21/2006 8:29 am

Very well said Ger, me thinks you were a great school board president

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:10 pm:
Thank you, that seems like a life ago. sigh.

HBowt2 60F

7/21/2006 11:36 am

great post ger....i always tell my kids that....if you got nothing good to say best say nothing at all....

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:11 pm:
Yes, I think it has to be repeated 100 times until the age of 18 and then repeated occasionally to properly work.

rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
7/21/2006 5:33 pm

Yes, father.

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:13 pm:
Remind me if I repeat it later and get ready for bed.

ProtonicMan 49M

7/21/2006 5:55 pm

    Quoting rm_AnOddGirl:
    Do No Harm
    Be Excellent to Each Other
    Party On!

Excellent quote from an Excellent movie.

Both OddGirl's line and Gerson's statement are well said, and it would be good for these words to be heeded in places far beyond Blogville. Unfortunately, in the end people will be people, and rants and tempers will abound. In those instances, those with cooler heads should start with the R...

Recognize that we are not all alike... and remember that this applies to temperament as well as little things like skin color, gender, and political orientation.


rm_gerson42 replies on 7/21/2006 9:12 pm:
... what movie? I didn't know she was quoting from a movie. We get what we give.

wickedeasy 68F  
30939 posts
7/22/2006 7:40 am

an update

one brother replied: i don't need my sister to tormet me too - my ex wife is doing a fine job all on her own

the other brother replied: but you still love us anyway...what's that say about YOU?

just realized this is on the wrong post - sorry


You cannot conceive the many without the one.

8337 posts
7/25/2006 12:06 am

You make some valid points, Gerson.

I do admit I have been lacking in some of these areas.

You are the voice of reason in the storm that is: AdultFriendFinder blogville.


"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur

rm_gerson42 replies on 7/25/2006 10:42 am:
Not sure about being the voice of reason but thanks for saying it.
Thank you, they deserve it.
ger - (Replying to comments assuming that commentator commented freely and without expectation.)

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