something i wrote  

rm_dontttstop 55M
9 posts
4/18/2006 4:43 am

Last Read:
10/17/2006 9:56 pm

something i wrote

cimon and pero 1540



am reverting toward being nocturnal again
just as the sun is returning
night thoughts differ from day
an interesting thought to me
i know my card, my numbers,
the stars destiny for me for the year
what more could i ask for
lots, but i'd settle for clarity
current events
must have stirred up something
that is settling slow ely or not at all

is my brain getting full
not overflowing but above optimum level
my computer runs best with less than 50%
of its hard drive used
needs the empty space temporarily to perform
i remove files as needed to maintain this
i used to use alcohol clear my spaces
i'm the only one i know i know
that prefers the hangover
over the high
the quiet
the ability to think of nothing
a hard task
try it
internal dialog murmurs away incessantly

75% or there abouts of merchant marines
are/were "hyperactive"
we have to be
try standing on a steel deck 22 hours
with sideways snow seeking a way
through your mustang suit
which might keep you alive
long enough for the captain or mate
to get the boat around
if anyone saw you fall
the floating processors were the worst
132 come aboard Christmas morning
valentines day sees half of them replaced
by easter ten of the original crew are on her
we rig for herring
nasty little scales float everywhere
seems like the next day
salmon start to be slaughtered at the mouths
of the river
a huge floating city of boats
billowing diesel into the night
which is gone
on the solstice the sun
barely dips below the horizon
as i stack 75lb frozen cases of salmon
in the frozen hold of a 6 story ship for 36 hours
before it is noticed that my relief is sleeping
september is southeast sock-eyes gone
we go after chums with occasional silvers
which give way to the pinks
then halibut which stink to high heaven
the inland passage is a welcome sight
until vancouver island
the seattle locks
we dock
and unload a million plus pounds
before we can go
touch the land

almost ten months on that boat that year
usually around ten women
for 122 guys
to treat like queens
the women attach themselves to someone
when the constant advances wear them down
the girls cabin is the place
sounds like an orgy
and is
my girl likes to come to my cabin
six bunks rather than twelve
we start off quietly
but she was a screamer
my poor roommates
no sex forever
listening
to that
one
woman
that i left the ship with
we split before rounding the olympic peninsula
after three nights of laying
in the elwah hot springs
she is uptight
about nudity
about everything
i can lie in the pools all night
maybe forever
we split the next day
i drag my sea bag into an irish bar in ballard
a tall blond woman
too good looking for me to approach
approaches me
we hit it off
one of her friends
wants to bring me home
its her birthday
sara fends her off
i have since had three women
approach me in bars
on their birthdays
and i made myself a present
to each
i came home to all my clothes
on the porch over one
but it was not only her birthday
her best friend of a brother had died
how could i refuse her
she had me pinned up against the wall
when the taxi got there
i saw my girlfriends roommate
in the booth behind me with a triumphant smile
i smiled back as we got into the cab
when i woke i noticed that this girls room
was identical to my girls room
right down to the black feather boa near the bed
i walked home slowly that morning
telling my girl that she would like her
they were both bi
she met the girl later
while they were both aborting my baby
at the same time on the same day
she did like her
i was right
but back to sara
she carries one of my bags
to a small apartment
filled with oils, pigments, and canvas
have sex until the sun reflects from the peaks
i can't sleep
i write a poem in the dim light
lines running over each other in the night

Once in a blue moon
Eyes meet and sparkle
Conversation flows
Laughter erupts
Minds and bodies mesh
Form a moment
Past swept away
Memories safely bound
Future unheeded
Slips into now
Lips caress
Limbs intertwine
Two minds
Two bodies
One thought
One breathe
One heartbeat
Once in a blue moon

she wakes
starts upon seeing me
one of the best nights of my life
she remembers nothing
tells me to leave
NOW
i return to the pub
where the puppy on the bar
keeps drinking my Guinness
as i listen to the only other patron
explain why he had no choice
other than to break his wife's arm
for what reason escapes me now
then a good story
about using his guitar to paddle
his canoe away from the falls

enough for now


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