Any advice for new swingers?  

rm_bumms69 48M/41F
4 posts
2/23/2006 10:55 pm

Last Read:
5/22/2006 11:53 am

Any advice for new swingers?

We are now getting a little familiar with how this works. Any advice for married couples? Past problems, things that worked, horror stories? Let us know, we are so green and waiting for that first contact. Please help. Thanks.

cheeting4fun2 50F

2/24/2006 6:04 am

Hello Bumms,

I 'm not sure that this will be good advice or not, becouse we are still in the process of making the rules. We have experimented without rules, it kinda just happened if ya know what I mean. We started out the hard way and I have learned a little, form this experience, I will share. I would have to say make sure that both of you first and formost have good communication together.

Make rules that encapsulate all possabilites. make sure that you both are truly ready, both phyisically and mentaly. Make exit plans one or the other may not be attracted, and want out. Move slowly, think things out before acting on them. Always meet in public, if you hit things off, then go get a room together, do not go to one that someone else has goten, you may end up being vedioed, or on someones spycam; unless you are into this sort of thing.

Keep it classy. Keep it safe, dont give out to much info about your self, talk with who you are planing this with, get to know eachothers likes/disslikes, and personal habbits, they may be a turn on or a turn off. Never include coworkers, it could lead to work unrest in the future. Hope I have helped some, We have talked allot about this and are going threw the same thing, if you have any advice please let me know. Hannah

rm_bumms69 48M/41F
1 post
2/24/2006 12:51 pm

That is really helpful. We are looking for that similar type of couple that we are. Our biggest debate is visting with couples in our general area. Is that ever a problem? I am hopeful that we all have the same privacy issues..Do you think? We have a family and our kids are in sports, so I just want to make sure we dont have any problems. But with that all aside, Yes we have talked about all the possibilities, and still working on that. We expect that we will learn from time to time, what works for us. I just wonder if there are any "rules"..some swingers want to talk on the phone very early. I am waisting there time? If I dont want to right away? Some just wink back and forth..Well you have givin really good advise, thanks so much. Especially the classy part, I think sometimes you can get lost in the erotic side and make it trashy. When in fact it is something very special that a couple can enjoy. Thanks agian. Still looking for more input...I am sure we are not the only ones. =)

pussykats123 64M/50F

4/11/2006 5:46 am

We are by no means experts, but have been doing this for a couple of years now. Our suggestion is to rembember what this is all about.....FUN. Communicate with each other about what you want to do with other people. Like most everybody else, you probably have enough stress in your life. Don't let this add to it. If it does, find a hobby you enjoy. Go with the flow, do what you want to, and DEFINATELY be ready to politely say no. We have met several couples from here, but played with only a few. We have never had a problem saying, "no thank you" and neither should you. Unfortunately, many people on this site are not what they appear to be. Some post pictures from 30lbs ago, or are just wierd single men posing as a couple. You'll figure them out fairly soon. Fortunately, there are some that are very real and lots of fun to be with. We have had the pleasure of meeting some wonderful people....and a couple of flakes as well. But most all of our experiences so far have been positive. The people we have encountered have jobs and family and are just as concerned about being discreet as we are. Thus far, that has not been a problem for us. Having said that, our preference is to stay away from the various swing clubs and other public gatherings. Hope this has been helpful.

Good luck and HAVE FUN!

rm_JSAinAZ 43M/42F
1 post
5/21/2006 11:58 am

We're fairly new to this as well. I'd have to agree with the previous posters in that communication with your other half is key. Then communication with the other couple.

If there is good open communication everything will sort itself out.

I know personally that we are discreet and would hope that anyone we meet would be the same way.

Become a member to create a blog