Anyone know where I can find a good B.A.A group? (blog-addicts anonymous)  

rm_aranayd 47M
898 posts
8/24/2006 11:10 pm

Last Read:
8/28/2006 1:29 pm

Anyone know where I can find a good B.A.A group? (blog-addicts anonymous)

Okay, I have a problem. AdultFriendFinder blogging is addictive.

I’ve never been one to have an addictive personality, but I think this AdultFriendFinder-thing is becoming a problem. I’m here all the time. I haven’t neglected my life for it or anything. I still go to work, pay the bills, mow the lawn, and clean the house, but after that…? I don’t even know what I’m looking for. Most times I’m just cruising blogs and profiles, or awaiting responses on mine. It wouldn’t really be a problem, but this is time I should be using for writing.

Take tonight for example. I opened my book (ie. double-clicked the icon on my desktop that links to it) and stared at the last paragraph I had written for more than an hour. Nothing. Blank. I did, however, think of a new tale I’d like to tell in my blog. Is anyone else seeing the problem?

Originally I started here as a distraction from my writing. I was over-obsessing about it. Over-analyzing. I thought to myself: “Well Self, if nothing else, I’ll make a few friends and be distracted for a while.” Yeah, quite the distraction. There are a handful of women here that have me distracted to the point of mindlessness. Don’t laugh, you know who you are! But, that’s not even what I’m talking about. That is why I joined, after all. No, what I mean is the blogging.

The closest I’ve ever come to keeping a journal (outside what was required in some school classes) is the notebooks full of lame, potential song-lyrics I’ve collected over the years. Snippets and odd lines that would occur to me, and I would jot down because they might make good lyrics some day. Some have. Some have worked their way into my book. But most just sit there doing nothing, waiting their turn. When a chronic blogger from here kept asking me if I was going to start a blog, I didn’t know what to say. I had honestly never seen a blog-page before. I knew what they were, but it seemed like a way to keep in touch with friends more than anything a random person would see. I looked up the blogs here and saw my mistake. EVERYONE looks. It’s like a huge, uncensored, community bulletin-board. It was an interesting discovery. But what would I write? Why would anyone want to hear my thoughts? Hell, sometimes I don’t want to hear my thoughts. She asked again; liking the way I word things, she wanted more (don’t all women ). Still, I kept responding to her queries with ‘no’. Who wants to hear from me? Well, who except her?

Then I thought of something to write about, and did. It was okay. Not great, but okay. I decided to post it. I didn’t know if it would happen again, so I put a simple disclaimer in the header of my blog and actually titled the thing in response to her repeated queries. It could be lame, it could be cool. Who knows? I certainly didn’t. Still don’t. But, I’d seen quite a few of the blogs here by then, and saw how random they were. Stories, poems, thoughts, rants, advise, questions, even a rather intriguing menu-of-events, anything at all. I didn’t see the harm. What the hell, right?

At the time, thanks in part to AdultFriendFinder, I had been having some very sexual thoughts, and I wrote-out an accounting of something that happened to me. It wasn’t really written as a story, more like I was telling someone about it. It was also very revealing for me to tell. Frankly, it ties with another experience for the most sexually-embarrassing events of my life, but it also ties (with a completely different, and not so humorous, situation) as the kinkiest things I’ve done. It was kind of fun to see people actually reading it. No one commented, though.

I started wondering if I could write out a story, give it life, and still keep it sexy. I truly wasn’t sure. My writing has never gone anywhere near that before. Swooning kisses and enduring love are about as passionate as a fantasy novel gets. I still don’t think that second attempt is much good. A great memory, a decent story, but it had the feel of ‘telling a tale’ like the first one. I did better the third time, and better still the fourth; with a pair of blurbs in there that I rather like. The stories are memories of mine, great ones, so I got over the ‘campfire-tale’ thing and just kind of went with it. But the next was different… I had a fantasy, and decided to write it in ‘present tense’ as if it were happening then. Something I know I’m not very good at. It seemed to work, though. Even so, none of them have yet achieved the high standards I hold my writing to; I’m hard on myself in that. To make them pass my own harsh criticism would take months of going over them again and again, making small corrections and phrase-changes. Potentially, under that scrutiny, they might never get posted.

So I let them go quickly. I let you see them in the raw. One or two perusals to find glaring errors, and the world gets them. “Here you go. Enjoy?” Well, all three of you who actually read this, anyway. So, which would you prefer? Should I keep my stories to myself until I’ve worked them into something I can approve of, or should I post them like I have been? I do have a few more to tell, and the blurbs are something I’m not sure I can stop. When one of those happen to me, it’s either get it down on paper (figuritivley) or go insane. I’ve noticed a few mistakes I missed, typos and such, as I’m sure you have, but all in all… I AM HAVING FUN! I am neglecting a larger project to do it, but I’m entitled to some indulgences, aren’t I? I can flirt, and tease, and share, and even meet some people out there, right? Nothing wrong with that, as far as I’m concerned. Besides, I’m not neglecting it all altogether, just a little.

Now, there is another question here for those of you who plodded your way through this rambling, self-promoting, self-degrading, monolith of a blog. The question is this: How many days a week do you blog (reading/writing/responding) and, how long do you spend each time you do it? Is it too much? (In your opinion? In others’?) Not enough?

Let me know, I’ll be around.

twirly_girl 48F

8/24/2006 11:45 pm

1. Keep writing the stories. Don't worry about the errors. Just put it in your blog. That raw type of writing is what makes you real and not a harlequin romance. Save the perfect writing for publishing.

2. I like your blurbs. Like I've said, those are my favorite things to write. They are like spurts you that don't have to go anywhere and yet they could if you wanted them to.

3. No matter what you write, it's an excercise to the work you are doing on your novel. The more you write, the more it will shape your thoughts and ideas and then BAM! out of nowhere you have a fresh renewed energy for your work.

4. Gotta make sure more Kudos go out to [blog loneremily] for pointing you my way so she won't stay mad at me for not visiting her blog.

5. I spend waaaaaay too much time on the blogs. But I'm a hermit too so... LOL I check my emails at lunch and then I'm on here for about 4 or 5 hours a night reading, posting and commenting. THAT is too much IMO. But I am addicted and it keeps my mind off of things that I don't feel like thinking about right now. So for me I guess, it's kind of an escape from the the hell-hole I work in.

Gotta get my gold membership moneys worth so here's a pic.
Use this to inspire a story.


rm_aranayd replies on 8/25/2006 12:01 am:
1- Cool, I will.
2- Some do want to be more. That second one wanted to be a song. I think it still does.
3- Good point. I never thought of it that way. Thanks.
4- She is a good-egg isn't she.
5- That's about what I'm spending at it too (maybe a little less). It's still a new discovery for me, though. I'll get over it some.

rm_goddess1946 107F
13518 posts
8/26/2006 8:43 am

Big time addicting...and yet I think that there are worse things
I could have an addict hit on than something that I've found not
only amuses is often my muse for writing and painting...
and the thoughts of everyone collectively have given me many things
to think about that have served me well in my real life...and I do
have one. I have to be on and off at weird times of the night and day to be able to read as much as I want to..and respond. I'm posting less frequently now than I used to so that I have time to read everyone that I want to read and respond along the way. Glad to see you here...we have a great group of people who share their hearts in Blogland...that's a great addiction to plug into

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...

rm_aranayd replies on 8/27/2006 9:23 pm:
Thanks for the comments, they are always welcome.

rm_loneremily 34F
328 posts
8/27/2006 11:26 pm

How many days a week do you blog (reading/writing/responding):
Whenever I can get internet at home I blog. Sometimes I get so starved that I go to my friend's house to blog.

how long do you spend each time you do it?
Sometimes I have to make it quick. Sometimes I have AdultFriendFinder on all day. It just depends on the amount of time I have.

Is it too much? (In your opinion? In others’?)
Yup, I think so.

rm_aranayd replies on 8/28/2006 1:04 pm:
Too much? You? I have a hard time believing that you do ANYTHING to excess.

33763 posts
8/28/2006 10:19 am

yeah ..after my first post..i was hooked..i read and reply to comments everyday..and btw..i like your style of writing .very spontaneous..

~ The New & Improved Cocksucker ~

rm_aranayd replies on 8/28/2006 1:13 pm:
...and the addiction grows. See you in the pages, and thank you so much for the comment.

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