The Things I Crave  

rm_VladX4 44
10 posts
1/18/2006 3:48 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

The Things I Crave


The Things I Crave

In my mind...

I feel the leather tighten on my wrists.
Arms spread as if I pray to Gods, which never listen.
I grip the rope, muscles tight, stretched out in a Y, my legs apart.
I feel her hands slide down the back of my neck, down my back, down my legs.

She spreads my legs wider. Places the leather straps around my ankles. Slides the rope through the metal rings. Ties them and pulls them taut. I lower my head and breath deep.

I feel her warm breath on my neck and then the coolness of the blade. Sliding over the warmed skin. And then it's gone. The fabric pulls tight across my chest as I hear the blade tear through it. Up my spine, over my shoulders. I feel the fabric fall. Feel the warm air on my back. But I do not crave the warmth.

Hands move over my head, through my hair. Gently down my cheeks. I smell the leather as she brings it to my lips. I part them slowly as the leather is pressed to my mouth. I taste the salty strap as I bite down.

And for a moment there is silence. For one moment my mind is clear. Not the racing glimpses of thoughts that haunt my daily life. Like a room full of people all asking me questions, which I must walk through and still hold firm the clarity that the rest of the world takes for granted.

For a moment there is silence. It stretches and I remember. That the sun is bright, but I only see rain. That I've forgotten what it is to be hungry. Only filling my mouth with food, swallowing, to stop the pain in my stomach. But there is no flavor.

In the silence there is only loneliness, and loss. And I want to scream to make it stop. Anything to make this stop. This silence, this emptiness. Stretched to the four winds my body tight, my head bowed. I weep tears as I beg for the pain. Something to make me feel.

There is a loud crisp sound as the whip kisses flesh. I feel a sudden burst of hot pain across my back. I bite into the leather and inhale sharply as I feel it. But I do not cry out.
And then another and another. Slowly, and each time a little harder. Teeth clenched the only sound I make is a soft deep purr, a moan that calls out for more. Harder. Harder! Harder!!

I can feel the sweat running down my face. I feel the drops of blood and sweat that mix and sting and burn. The leather strap falls from my mouth as I let my body hang limp against the bonds. Body spent, but hard , the heat rises from between my legs. A hunger in my stomach, lust on my lips.

Alive again,

The world’s white noise drifts in like a breeze. I feel the sun on my skin, warm.

I open my eyes. Find myself on a bench by a stoplight. I pull a cigarette from my jacket. Think to myself, "I should quit soon." as I click the Zippo and inhale. Cars heading home from work. People talking and looking in the shop windows. I begin to walk back to my bike. I smile as I pass the people on the street. Polite as ever.

I remember something a girl said to me.. "Pretty, pretty boy." ... And just like her, the world passes by me, thinking pretty pretty boy. They only see the pretty package. And they probably wouldn't believe.

The things I crave.....

rm_PurryKitty2 49M/51F
9753 posts
1/18/2006 7:10 pm

I think I just got hungry and am craving something ?*

Purry {=}

Purry


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