Erotic Evolution?  

rm_SubMaleToy4u 53M
3 posts
5/14/2006 7:10 am
Erotic Evolution?

I have often wondered what it would be like to encounter a former lover these days, specifically one of those I loved before I began exploring dominance and submission, exhibitionism and voyeurism, and the other fuzzy terms that strive to capture the sexual games I've taken up wholeheartedly these days. Would they, too, have evolved sexually?

I'd like to think so. Those who have not are the ones who end up unhappy, stuck in sexless marriages with people they often feel like they no longer really care for. And, given the rate of divorce in this world, that seems a fate that is far too common these days.

How and why did I evolve, from someone simply interested in exploring the various physical realms of sexual activity ‒ oral, vaginal, and anal ‒ to someone eagerly exploring the assorted mental realms as well? When did I go from a basic perv to a cerebral one? Frankly, I think we all evolve as individuals ‒ certainly physically, as we age, and hopefully emotionally too. So why not sexually as well?

Have you noticed that many who are interested in the kinkier side of sex tend to be a little older? Does this mean we develop these tastes over time? Or perhaps that we grow more comfortable expressing and exploring these interests as we mature? While I still enjoy the old rub and tumble of "vanilla" sex, my interests have grown and expanded ‒ and, arguably, also become more focused and attuned.

These days I have developed a keen desire for engaging in sexual dominance and submission, including things like bondage, spanking, exhibition, and even some humiliation. Not to mention the creampies, cuckoldry, leather riding crops, and strap-ons the size of a small Buick. It's all a far cry from the days when a pair of panties would make my blood boil. Regardless of the rationale, I clearly have evolved sexually.

Unfortunately, I am single right now, so my evolution has become a bit stunted, as it can only happen in fits and starts, when I do have the pleasure of being in a sexual relationship with someone I care about. The upside of this is that I haven't evolved away from anyone ‒ perhaps someone with divergent interests ‒ as seems far to common with people who married young.

As for why my sexual evolution has followed the path it has, I do have theories on that as well. When one partner chooses to submit and the other to dominate, sexually at least, they are putting their lover's interest and pleasures above their own. True, they often accept a role that satisfies their own desires, but anyone who has ever played these games knows that you really have to put your focus and energy into meeting the other persons needs and desires. Just as with any actor, the role you play does provide a certain degree of inherent pleasure, but it is really done for the benefit of your audience.

And, after all, isn't this what love really is ‒ putting someone else's needs and desires above your own? So the act of submission, one could argue, is nothing more than the ultimate physical embodiment of love itself, literally handing over your physical being to the person you love. In turn, dominance is not only the natural reciprocation of that, but it is also a form of fulfilling the needs and desires of those who take pleasure in submission. Which is probably while I feel so comfortable being a switch at heart, in that both roles are a means ‒ emotionally and sexually ‒ to the same end: the expression of love. And I have a lot of love to give!

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