Live from Hollywood....Celebrity Sex Quotes  

rm_Simplysexy65 51F
870 posts
7/8/2006 5:50 pm

Last Read:
7/8/2006 10:34 pm

Live from Hollywood....Celebrity Sex Quotes

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." --Woody Allen

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL." --Lynn Lavner

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." --Camille Paglia

"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are unimportant." --George Burns

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship." --Sharon Stone

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." --Jack Nicholson

"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." --Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a sense of humor?)

"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." --Robin Williams

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." --Billy Crystal

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful." --Robert De Niro

"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?" --Dustin Hoffman

"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'." --Jerry Seinfeld

"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis! , and only enough blood to run one at a time." --Robin Williams

"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom." --Joan Rivers

"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy." --Steve Martin

"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for in later life." --Elmo Phillips

"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde

"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married." --George Burns

And I will quote for my fav dude Al Pacino---Nothing like the Scent of a Woman and better yet Nothing like the Sense of her too!

sugurkat2 38F

7/8/2006 7:17 pm

Awesome! I enjoyed reading these.

cobra70118 106M

7/8/2006 9:34 pm

Pretty darn funny. Great choices, Thank you...

somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
7/9/2006 11:34 am

Little wonder that celebrities are so often so right and so screwed up. I’ve tried everything but it takes all night to do what I use to do all night.

nottycara 37F

7/12/2006 1:36 am

"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." --Oscar Wilde

i LOVE this one! Thanks!

rm_ColtPA 72M  
28 posts
7/14/2006 5:51 pm

Mae West aked John Wayne how tall he was...he said 6'6". She then said..."forget about the six feet and let's get down to the six inches"!
Another thing she said was...when she's bad, she's awfully good!

waterdragon67 65M

7/15/2006 6:17 am

There is a website i found that is science philosophy and erotica the quotes are very good --- but not sure if i should name the site -- in case its classed as abuse

For example

'The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer, 'What does a woman want?' (Sigmund Freud)


sex is dirty only when it's done right.' (Woody Allen)

or even

'Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie.' (William shakespeare)

redmustang91 58M  
8924 posts
7/19/2006 5:14 am

I like billy crystal's line! So true in my experience.

patientlypleased 42M
3 posts
7/22/2006 1:00 pm

Great job! Loved reading all of them. Insight and humor. We all need a little of both - and yes, Woody Allen was right.

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