Yet another absence... [drama]  

rm_PlayTGurl 47T
5 posts
8/28/2006 2:07 pm
Yet another absence... [drama]


I have taken a couple of weeks off from the site here. I have decided that I don't want to have any more dates unless everyone involved is aware of what they are getting and getting into.

I will post a current picture of my body as soon as I am able.

I had a less than fun encounter... and then it went from bad to worse. I needed some time to work it all out in my mind.

I do what I do for the FUN of it all. For the shared experience of something new with someone new.... or something old with someone new.... or something new with someone old, but new to me... or.... well, I think you get the idea.

I'll just say that neither of us got what we expected and it did NOT end well. And if he should read this.... he hopefully knows that I did all I could to protect his identity because I am not feeling up to writing a balanced-view story.

The story... MY SIDE...

We exchange emails and photos, with all my usual warnings about how I have gained some weight since those photos were taken. He didn't seem to mind. He tells me he's married and wants to meet me solo first, since his wife is a bit new to transfolk. No problem! (I've done it before.)

So I show up at the apartment, pretty close to looking natural... no padding, no shapers, very little makeup, casual clothes. He said he lived on "Cap Hill"... turns out he is deep in the Central District (C.D. or "seedy", both work).

I'm a little nervous, but what the heck. I follow through.

He comes to the door, wearing shorts and a sports-team t-shirt. He is 50+ lbs heavier than his photos (he NEVER ONCE mentioned he was not as his photos show!), nearly bald, full beard, and sunburnt.

He sets his beer down to give me a hug. He stinks of a day working out in the sun. Did I mention he lives in an apartment? (No yard. No shower?)

The apartment is less organized than my car. And I am not inviting people into my car. (My disaster zone, you are not welcome.) There are piles of beer cans and old magazines (a couple of recent Playboys). He throws (tosses) a few clothes and childrens' toys from the couch to the floor, and invites me to sit.

I take off my jacket and sit down.

"Children?" I ask, hoping there wasn't one sleeping in a nearby bedroom. (Playboys, beer, mess, trash, porn on the TV - on MUTE, and inviting potential playmates over... with one parent gone.)

"Nope. Had'em over last week. Wife and me are splitting." That's NOT what his profile says, or what he told me in email. Also, it was late in the week... kids' toys still strewn about the place... looking like it hadn't been vaccuumed in months... I take a deep breath and keep going.

By now, I think there might still be something redeeming about him... I just have to find it. However, I am a bit curious about something.

"Your profile says you're married." He laughs and goes to the kitchen. "Yeah, keep forgetting to update that... and the chat stuff too. Want a beer?"

He forgot to update his profile... I get that. He forgot to update his "chat stuff" too? Does he use macros while chatting and writing emails?

I politely refuse the beer (Coors, for those who care). He comes in and drops onto the couch. The force is almost enough to launch me onto my feet! I am NOT joking! I almost ended up on the floor!

He laughs it off, and I join him. Then he begins. "You sure didn't dress up for me..." I have another change in the car, but I save that for people I want to get impress... along with my makeup kit.

"I didn't want your neighbors to get the wrong idea."

"Fuck'em! It'd be the most action they seen around here in a long time. Except for C.C. downstairs... she's a whore." I smile politely. "Are you missing teeth?"

I'm sensitive about that, but I explain that I am losing them about one a year due to a condition that has no treatment.

"Well, I ain't putting my cock anywhere near that shit!" Okay. Not a problem, buddy.

I nod. "Okay. No problem."

"Why don't you stand up and show me what you got going on there..." His last word was garbled by the can of beer he resumed sucking on. It was single syllable, so it could have been 'bitch' or 'slut', but I gave him credit it might be 'babe' or 'girl'.

I stood up and did a short walk, to the door... and I almost kept going. And then I turned back. "You said you gained some weight not a whole person! You look fucking pregnant! Why don't you warn someone?! That shit's fucking gross!"

It's a popular fetish... but not for everyone. I try not begrudge someone for their fetish, or lack thereof.

Maybe this is my 'out'? Maybe I should use this to run for it?

Before I can think of how to respond, he continues. "Your tit are coming nice. That's cool. Guess that comes with being knocked up!" He laughs, but I don't even bother trying.

He stands up and heads into the kitchen. "I'm gonna need a couple more beers for this to happen. You sure you don't want one?"

I go and pick up my coat. "Look, maybe we should try this some other time..."

He quickly jumped out of the kitchen, blocking the front door. "What the fuck?! You wanna go? What for?"

"Look..."

"You fat, teasing bitch! What the fuck you think you're doing? Trying to case the place? Steal my shit when I'm at work?"

"Look... There's no chemistry between us if you need three beers..."

"Seven. Fine. Go. GO! Get the FUCK OUTTA here!"

Well, I left. Quickly.

And now.... Now...

Since then, I have been having self-esteem issues. The comments about my weight and appearance have really been getting to me. I need to get some other opinions, maybe...

Maybe I just need to get back into better shape before I start dating again.

Any ideas?

lbd24 38T

10/21/2006 9:47 pm

Honey you were up front and honest with him, besides he doesn't really sound like the champ your looking for. sounds like a fat alcoholic slob, oh yes and ignorant as well. You may not be as comfortable with the way you look lately but thats your opinion his does not matter. sorry if thats not completely pc but this shit pisses me off.
keep strong sister.
Luv Janell.


bilatexcouple 49M/49F
1 post
7/8/2007 8:33 pm

Good god in H what an asshole. I see you posted this almost a year ago. I hope you've had better experiences since then that have made you happy


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