Being teased and the past  

rm_NaeniaSea 47F
273 posts
2/5/2006 1:49 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Being teased and the past

I think I'm torturing myself way too much with this site. All these photos of hard cocks thrust in my face...what's a girl to do?

I'm not quite ready to meet anyone in person yet...I have to count on my self-control. I have a plan, I have to stick to it. Every time I jump into things, I manage to make a mess of it all or meet someone who is totally wrong for me.

It seems to be one extreme or another. I've met people just for sex and never saw them again...and then I've met people who have gotten too serious before I was ready for such a thing. And then along comes the drama that I try so hard to avoid.

For the first time, I've not gone from one relationship to another. It's been 3 weeks since I last had sex. If only I could keep my passion in check, maybe I'll actually have a balanced yet exciting love life.

I'm debating posting something I wrote over a year was the night I met "W"...naughty followed by more naughty. I'm not so sure it's anything to be proud of, but I'm not one to deny the things I've done...even if rather shameful.

If I have or have yet to leave the impression that I was a cheating wife, I'll have to correct that assumption. I was married for 7 years before I even thought about another man. I told my exhusband that I wasn't happy and we separated for a short time. Well, he moved back in and we made another go of it. A couple of years later, we were back to square one. It was slightly different though because I was no longer a stay-at-home mom and I was surounded by intelligent men at work. I knew what my relationship lacked above all else but was distracted by petty things. We had an open marriage for a short time, but that really wasn't going to work. I did cheat twice through all of this, but it is really not in my nature to do so...I'd rather be attentive to one man only. If I feel the need to screw someone else, well, it's time to move on.

I may live with my ex, but we have separate lives. He's dating sevaral women and I've been involved in a serious relationship for the past year. He will always be a very good friend of mine, but I have no desire to get back together with him. We do NOT sleep with eachother. In another couple of months, he won't be here for me to use as an excuse not to get involved in anything too serious. Perhaps by then I'll have learned that aforementioned self-control.

rm_art_persists 53M
1789 posts
2/5/2006 8:03 pm

Why control yourself?

49AK 56M
1823 posts
2/10/2006 2:53 pm

I have a philosophy... some might call it a rationalization... I look at dating and relationships as a buffet. If you have really high and specific expectations (prime rib), you're likely to be disappointed with the chilled shrimp, poached salmon and rice pilaf. On the other hand, if go expecting to sample a little of everything, you might find a new favorite. The challenge is keeping that mindset for the long term - just like at the buffet, at some point everything looks inviting, and you want some of all of it, but all you do is get filled up really fast (no pun intended). Its not like they're going to take it all away if you don't hurry up... take your time, enjoy the variety, and pace yourself.

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