Smoker's UNITE!!! LOL  

rm_Hrd4YouAll 57M
12 posts
4/7/2005 6:30 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Smoker's UNITE!!! LOL

I am a smoker. I've been smoking since the 70's. I would love to quit, but I don't want to give up that special feeling of suffocation, especially after a meal. I also collect those damn Marlboro Miles. I got the tent, the grill, the sleeping bags, the fishing rod, the boombox, the clothes, the towels, the ashtrays, pool cues, lighters, poker chips, dominos... I am saving now for the "Big Red Iron Lung." Hey, do you know what you get when you collect 500,000 Marlboro Miles? CANCER!

Have you seen the "New" Marlboro 72's? These are noticeably shorter than regular cigarettes.
I know why they made them. Three reasons:
1) a shorter cigarette has lower tar & nicotine levels - so Philip Morris can say they're making "safer" cigarettes.
2) The same price, less cigarette... Coincidence? I think not. They're always looking to increase income and decrease costs. and
3) A shorter cigarette means a shorter cigarette break - this is Corporate America conspiring to shorten our breaks and hence, increase our workload. "Ok, we are changing policy on smoke-breaks. Instead of the usual 5 minute break, you now can have only a 3 minute cigarette break, so you have to smoke these 72's." I wonder if Marlboro is getting kick-backs for this.

I want to open a restaurant for smokers only, I'll call it "The Smoker's Grill." - "Welcome to Smoker's Grill. Would you like the smoking or the heavy smoking section? Our special today is Smoked Chicken and Charcoal Shrimp on a bed of tobacco leaves with a nicotine cream sauce followed by a dessert of Marlboro Menthol Cream Pie." I figure as long as we keep the ashtrays emptied and the coffee is good we'll make a fortune!"

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