The Tale of the Man  

rm_GoodHands700 37M
3 posts
8/1/2006 9:24 am
The Tale of the Man

The Tale of the Man

Lo did the man kill the deer & the host of angels cometh forth.
Saying “ Thou hast killed a guise of the lord! Thou shalt be hatethed by all other men!” The man careth not for he was employed with the Inland Revinue.

Later the man came upon others. Seeing them kneeleth in prayer spoke thus “ Lo, I have killethed the lord, though shalt grovel no more!” Apon seeing him they smote him for they hateith him and returneth to groveling for old habits die hard.

Thus the man came before the gates of heaven dead deer in tow.
“Thou, are barred!” proclaimed Peter. “My curse was that I only be hatethed!” protestith the man. “I know, but I won’t open the gate for I hateth thou!” sayeth Peter. Thus the cheribum pelted the man with pebbles till he runneth away.

Lo the man walked the lands of the dead. There upon he was mugged repeatedly by the Clockshrew. Of all bar the deer and his shoes for they were cheep. Also dumping the dry cleaning bill upon him as he sleepith.

Thus, the man cometh upon the gates of hell. “What, does thou looketh at?” stammered the man. “I knoweth not, for my eyesight is not good enough” replied Cerberus, whom was overly fond of nob gags porcedded to accost the man for he hateith him.

Thus, the man entered hell entered hell, minus shoes as Cerberus, whom never before able to mug people due to the antics of the Clockshrew, availed himself. Upon seeing the torments of the dammed, the man quailed for he knew he was hatethed. “Thou who is hatethed can not tarry here for I also hateth thou, too greatley to allow thou to remain in thy relm!” proclaimed Lucifer. Thusly the man runneth like fuck for he spyeth the spawn collecting pebbles.

Lo the man becometh depressed, “Lo, a am accursed beyond all others, the price of deer is unjust!”. Verily the lord apeareth before the man saying “ April Fools!”. Thusly the man kicked the shit out of the lord for he had losteth his sense of humour, and for ruining the end of this fable.

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