damn phases  

rm_DreamerPJ16 34F
102 posts
8/17/2006 7:37 pm

Last Read:
8/19/2006 9:07 pm

damn phases

so i dunno if i'm just worn out, or it's cuz i moved back to p-town or what, but i've been so blah this week. i'm in this no alcohol, no sexual activity, no unneccessary spending money mindset. maybe it's cuz the 2 weeks before moving i was partying hard and going on so many dates that i just got worn out. or maybe it's b/c i just made an absolutely stupid regrettable decision going to the ER when i didn't need to, and getting billed $500, and being in a frenzy since then. but all my friends here i haven't seen in 8 months so i feel like i should be gettin' crunked w/ them, but i'm not in the mood. just want some alone time. and if nething, the total opposite of being horny and wanting ass----just wanting to chill out and cuddle with some1. i really shouldn't be caring what other ppl think of me, but i feel like i'm coming across as really blah and boring right now, which isn't a good impression to give after being away for so long....i've noticed i go through these phases. i slink away for some time and then after awhile get so much built up energy that i go out and have a completely wild nite. i'm not a social butterfly. but i like to go out and get to know ppl better and meet new people too. right now tho, my mind is getting the better of me. i'm worried about so much crap even tho i don't even have much on my plate right now. worrying about finances, the dangerous situations i've put myself in, stupid decisions i've made, controlling my anxiety, figuring out how i'm going to handle the upcoming year. i wish in all scenarios there is the possibility of "no strings attached", but i feel like there actually is no scenario for that. even in what some ppl would consider "no strings attached" situations, my mind drags me down. this is such a pessimistic entry. i don't like being pessimistic. but it's better in writing than burdening my friends. oh agitation.

Fletch8491 51M

8/18/2006 7:29 am

Sorry to hear that you are feeling down. We all go thru these phases. As I am sure you know, they pass. Just realize that some moment in the near future is gonna sneak up on you and make you smile when you least expect it. Take care!

SirMounts 103M

8/18/2006 5:57 pm

Well, there are hills and valleys. I bet you'll be in a better frame of mind very soon.
I'm glad that you're writing again here at your blog, Dreamer. *smiling*

Become a member to create a blog