Navigating the waters  

rm_DeeperThee 47M/47F
2 posts
5/2/2006 12:05 am
Navigating the waters

It's been interesting trying to find our way in this community over the last few months. I thought I'd share a bit about how our experience has been.

We've had a number of winks and given out a few ourselves. When we look to respond to a wink looks, of course, do enter into it, but what makes a much bigger impression is what exactly we see in the profile. A profile doesn't get much in the way of bonus points when it doesn't say more than a paragraph or two. If there isn't at least something of a clue as to what the people are like it's hard to really get too interested.

Emailing always gets a response (well, from couples, anyway). It might not get a positive one, but it will at least get a friendly response. A number of people are kind enough to do the same. There are, however, plenty more that don't--although it would be nice we wouldn't be interested in somebody who doesn't have the courtesy to respond so it doesn't really phase us that much.

Speaking of which, there have been a few that have engaged us in conversation in mail that suddenly find the need to stop responding to mail without explanation. From what I've seen it's not too uncommon to have that happen, but it is frustrating to see these same people show up online again and again without (apparently) enough time to send a simple email that they are no longer interested (let alone with a reason why). Logically (again) we don't really want anything to do with someone who can't show a little courtesy, but that doesn't change how unpleasant the experience is. Rule of thumb is you get two or three unanswered emails and then the ball is completely in your court.

Some would prefer to chat online a fair amount to begin with. We try to accomodate that, but it is quite the time sink and is difficult for us to pull off sometimes.

We have met with a few couples and have even gotten physical. We're definitely for real, but we see how so many posts can say "please be for real".

One thing that strikes me as odd is how someone can be interested without making the effort to look into depth about who we are. It is pretty explicit in our profile that we have further info here, but very few seem to bother. Hmm.

Here's a little secret for you. If we look at your profile and don't wink it may, of course, be because we're not interested. A number of times, however, it's because we're not positive we're interested. There quite frequently isn't enough information to really tell us one way or another. Only way to *really* know is to mail.

-He


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