Is she real? Tell me what you think  

rm_2b_free 69M
13 posts
3/18/2005 6:58 am

Last Read:
3/26/2006 7:02 pm

Is she real? Tell me what you think

After surfing AdultFriendFinder for awhile. It dawned on me that that there may be many, both male and female that are stuck in sexual purgatory. Surfing for a partner to explore their sexual fantasies is the easy part. Making the comittment to meet with them is the hardest. The question of who is real, and who is a fantasy is a tough one to answer. People do not always represent themselves for what they really are. A mistake in judgement can be very hurtful. How do you define who is real and who is not?

CuntSlurpa 47M
131 posts
3/18/2005 8:02 am

The best thing I can think of is to spend some time getting to know them by email (or chat, or whatever). Obviously you should also meet them for the first time in a *public* place. Make it clear that the first time you meet will probably not include sex.... Then if you hit it off you can always change your mind!

sportyfun56 107M

3/18/2005 8:11 am

I've been here for a while and I will share a bit with you on that. My suggestions are, if you want to have some reasonable confidence that who you are meeting is "real". Is to spend some good time in communication with them. Don't just meet after the first e-mail. Use Instant Messengers and phone to chat with and get to ask (and answer) all the questions there are before you know that this is a person you want to meet. Spend time watching them in a chat room at least before you approach them. Join some group discussions and you'll get to meet some there. You'll get some sense for the person and can make better decisions if you proceed this way.

Cathy_Dave 55M/55F

3/18/2005 11:15 am

The only way we have been able to define who is real and who is not is by communicating. Like mentioned we always communicate with the people or person for a length of time via email. if everything still seems all right then we will talk for awhile via the phone. Enough communication seems to trip an individual up if they are lieing or living in their own fantasy world. Wish we had done this from the start as we went through the games before we figured out that their are a lot of untrustworthy people on line.

Merry49 62F

3/18/2005 11:39 am

This is all good advice, in fact I 'demand' a certain length of written communication and then voice before meeting someone. However, it's far from full proof. I spent over six weeks chatting with a gentlemen (using that term very loosely) nearly every work day. We finally met and there was no chemistry at all (on my part). I felt like I had wasted so much time with this guys. So of late, I've gotten the meeting over with a little quicker if I'm intersted in someone, just to eliminate wasting all that time on one person who turns out to be a chatter, but that's about it. lol

People still misrepresent themselves and let's face it 99% of the guys here lie about one thing or another in their profile and/or when they chat with you. Usually it's when they're saying "uh huh, uh huh, uh huh" as they listen to you tell them what it is you're looking for, but aren't listening one damn bit. Sometimes I think they think if they say uh huh enough times you'll fuck 'em because they're so gosh darned agreeable and we should like that, or something like that any way. lol

In the two times I've been here on AdultFriendFinder and another site in the last 9 months I've met 15 men. I can think of only one of them that didn't tell at least one lie or another. Of the ones that I had fun with, they all lied when I told them I wasn't looking for simply an FB and they said they weren't either.



sportyfun56 107M

3/31/2005 8:20 am

I do agree with Sexyfit also. Cold feet syndrome


7/13/2005 5:05 pm

Sexyfitwoman makes a good point. Human beings do these kinds of things. In addition, I feel that folks can sometimes be treacherous or deceitful. My mom used to say (and, not to justify the deceit)"it's part of the human condition".


12/21/2005 9:56 am

I think most guys i have met have been honest about what they are looking for......i usually talk for a week or so but have found the best meets are the spontaneous preconception of what the guy is for a day or two and then meet to see if there is an attraction....why waste all that time when the pics arent always the best way to judge an attraction to someone....
i suaully dont even talk on the phone till i meet someone and i tell straight out there is no guarantee of sex!!! this isnt "free online hooker".......and if thats all they want they usually back out of the meet which is fine...not wasting my time>>>

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