Southernness  

rip1374 56M
150 posts
4/25/2006 3:48 pm

Last Read:
4/26/2006 6:11 am

Southernness


>
> Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a
> conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
> _____
>
> Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,
> peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
> _____
>
> Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
> "yonder."
> _____
>
> Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, ... as in: "Going
> to town, be back directly."
> _____
>
> Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for
> the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle
> of the table.
> _____
>
> All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
> term, but they know the concept well.
> _____
>
> Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for
> a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold
> potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add
> a large banana puddin!
> _____
>
> Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and
> "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.
> _____
>
> Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a
> redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
> _____
>
> No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
> signal is actually going to make a turn.
> _____
>
> A Southerner know! s that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an
> adverb.
> _____
>
> Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're
> "in line," ... we talk to everybody!
> _____
>
> Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're
> related, even if only by marriage.
> _____
>
> In the South, y'all is singular, .... all y'all is plural.
> _____
>
> Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
> _____
>
> Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
> perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried
> green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
> _____
>
> When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you
> are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
> _____
>
> Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea
> indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened.
> "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
> _____
>
> And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
> ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart" ... and go
> your own way.
> _____
>
> To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness:
> Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning.
> Bless your heart!
> _____
> And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all
> this Southern stuff, ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on
> Southernness as a second language!
> _____
>
> And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
> time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from
> the South, but I got here as fast as I could."

southrnpeach333 51F

4/25/2006 4:17 pm

Good Grief I love being a from the south!!


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