Am I just a prude?  

replicant354 53M/44F
104 posts
8/15/2005 6:05 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Am I just a prude?

Last night I was having a wonderful chat on MSN with a friend of mine that I met on this site. Both he and his wife have become good friends of mine and we chat frequently. I have an extensive list of contacts from here on my MSN and for the most part enjoy chatting with them. Every now and then though I get these people (I must say people because they are not all men) that after the initial hellos simply come online to engage in cybersex or try to get pics. I am not even sure if they are interested in meeting in person. For me meeting in person is the whole point!

Now I fully realize that this is a sex site; however if I want to engage in cyber sex I will simply use the cybersex room here or privately IM you on this site. I use my MSN as a way to get to know a person a little better before deciding to meet them and to arrange for meeting times and places. I don't feel comfortable arranging a meeting in a public chatroom...who know's who will show up LOL. I am not one of these people that will chat endlessly without any follow-up, I have met many wonderful real people from the site and would love to meet more. I'm also not the type of person who attatches a bunch of strings to the whole experience. If we meet and have a great time but don't develop a close friendship that's fine too.

I suppose that my complaint here is that I get a little tired of people that seem to make no use of the organ between their ears because they are so focused on the organ between their legs. I personally find intelligent conversation quite stimulating. The last thing I want after an exhausting day at work is to have a nice chat interupted by a fellow telling me he "wants to eat [me] after my lover has cum inside me" because he "loves sloppy seconds...they're so nasty"! Call me a prude if it is warranted, but I happened to be eating a late supper at my 'puter, a sandwich heavy on the mayo. You can see where my dirty little mind went with that! I won't look at mayo the same way again for a while!

So I way out of line here, I'd love to know! If you do give out your msn or personal contact info (or accept other peoples), do you use it as I do, strictly to arrange meets and see if folks are your "type", or do you use it for cybersex? If you're like me, do these men (and women) drive you a little nuts too? I'm getting a little tired of adding contacts and deleting them because they are all duds. I'd give up on the MSN thing altogether but I do continue to meet some wonderful people here as well as the duds!

Sorry about the little (HA!) rant!


Sammy9719 43M
1 post
8/16/2005 8:39 pm

I think I have working theory for why this is the case and possibly why its understandable to a limited extent. The key I think is the intelligent conversation part. Most people here aren’t really interested in intelligent conversation. Their interested in sex. I would say that the majority are interested in meeting provided that its clear that its about sex. I would say that for the majority of men who are intelligent (not simply beefcakes who can hold dirty talk sessions) this is not welcomed. Too often the formula for intelligent men is that if your perceived as intelligent first, then you become a non-sexual being ‒ ie a friend, intellectual buddy. Coming out guns blazing is a sure fire way, though not terribly subtle, of mitigating against the “just friends” bucket. Now perhaps its my own ego, or delusion, but when your smart and overly educated (in an interesting and entertaining manner), your often kept around for that non-sexual stimulus. Even though you’d just die for a bj. Sex is risk, and often ends on bad terms, which means an end to those really interesting things that one has gotten in the habit of hearing. Some people aren’t interested in the least in brains, but the majority of people want to be recognized by those whom they deem intelligent as worth talk with. In my everyday I’m constantly immersed in intellectual conversations, often surrounded by intelligent people, and my private life demands that appearances and discretion be held. This network is my dirty mouthed vacation. People often choose to think with their genitals to give their brains a rest ‒ and also not deny themselves a very necessary part of life that their everyday doesn’t really permit. What you described is certainly an annoyance, but it the reverse is true in my situation. Of course, the two are not mutually exclusive ‒ but given the scale of people out there its important to be clear right off the bat. Sure people often miss out when they narrow their focus too much, but that’s people. Just some thoughts

harpie8 49F

8/17/2005 3:09 am

Morning Rep,

No girl, you are not a prude at all. Come on now, I've met you how many times? You are one of the most real people I've met online in a long time. I can understand what you are saying about the MSN thing. Like you I have a lot of friends from a lot of different areas in my life on my list. It is a great way to further get to know others away from the normal chat rooms in a more private setting. I can't say the whole cyber thing really does it for me although I have dabbled in the past. I now have my messenger set to log on as 'appear offline' so that I can more easily pick and choose who I am in the mood to talk to.

Sammy, there are still women out there that think brains are at the top of the list. Remember the brain is the largest sexual organ we have.

rm_chagi_guy 49M
87 posts
8/17/2005 3:17 am

You a Prude? no way... some people just don't care what you want... they want what they want and they are just going to try and get it. I have found you just need to weed through these people... some people will just see your pic and get carried away... yummy.... lol...
This is why I always ask if a person has read my profile before chatting too much... have had the same type of thing happen to me.
It is all party of the fun I guess....

Alias_46 58M

8/17/2005 9:12 am

Well... we have already discussed this to some extent... thinking with your head or your brain! I like to think I can do both... simultaneously even! At the risk of putting off any "dumb blondes" or "dumb brunettes" that might have taken a liking to me, or maybe the "invisible woman" is on here and just wants an up against the wall quick fuck from an "invisible man", I do enjoy intelligent conversation. A woman that is intellectually stimulating as well as sexually stimulating is a woman I am more likey to see again!

As for msn... I don't do cybersex at all... sexual innuendos yes and maybe getting a start on sharing some fantasies... but cybersex? Nahh, I have a hard enough time typing with two hands! I do believe that people should learn that there is a certain etiquette to on-line conversations just as there is in person! Hopefully noone will walk up to someone at the meet and greet and make those kind of comments! R-E-S-P-E-C-T... what more can I say!

Okay... blogging time is up - back to work! LOL! See you tonight... this meet and greet should be great fun!!

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