redmustang91 58M  
8979 posts
3/7/2006 8:35 am

Last Read:
3/7/2006 11:53 pm


Like most men on this site, I have a hard time meeting eligible females from AdultFriendFinder. Perhaps I am too honest, blunt, sexual, or not agressive enough. It is one of those quandries. Mere typed words do not convey the real personality because many cues of voice and body language are missing.

I am most puzzled by those who claim there is no chemistry from a few words and a pic. Perhaps they are just being diplomatic and do not care for my exterior. But how can you tell chemistry in such a way? I am usually willing to meet a person in the flesh to see if there is a spark.

I have been surprised in both directions; some I thought were not that good looking, but still had charm and some who seemed attractive lacked personality.

My point is you cannot tell unless you meet...

MissAnnThrope 57F
11488 posts
3/7/2006 12:27 pm

Yes and if someone is lookingfor someone who looks like a model, middle aged and not great looking isn't going to do it. I get lots of mail from guys whose pictures I look at and say, "ACK! Not even with Ann Coulter's penis!" I send back a polite no thank you and get told someone who looks the way I do should be willing to fuck anyone who asks.

But the entire question of chemistry... I have made some of my best platonic guy friends from this site. Between emails and chatting and talking on the phone, it would be like we've known each other all our lives. In one case, which was the most extreme, we had a number of phone calls that lasted up to 16 hours before we met. We met... You could hear the mental "ewwwwww..." from both of us. But it didn't stop us from even more 16 hour phone calls afterwards, even once he moved back to the midwest. So even when you do feel an online chemistry, it doesn't always work out.

Look, when you put a pic up, or send one out, you are being judged on your looks right off the bat. Just like in real life, having a great personality and being able to charm doesn't mean a thing. This site has decided to try to sell the fantasy, instead of the reality. So now, even the women who are joining want models. Shallow isn't just for the men anymore.

redmustang91 58M  
8924 posts
3/7/2006 12:58 pm

I accept that looks matter and life isn't fair. I accept that if some woman wants black guy, a ten inch penis, or a foreskin, then I just don't qualify. My point is if I am in the acceptable-possible range, then a real in person meeting is the only way to tell if there is a possibility of chemistry. You have to make love and know each other for a while to tell if a short term thing or LTR is going to happen.

Women have the odds here so can be super picky if they choose to be. What I am suggesting is that they are picking without getting the useful info needed to make an intelligent decision...

crazygurl2xx 58F

3/7/2006 10:51 pm

I still think the odds of a real attraction are much greater in a face to face first time meeting than online where that has to be arranged. That's why no matter how many men I meet on this site, my odds were always better at the local bar to begin with just because we have all the physical attraction stuff out of the way up front...

redmustang91 58M  
8924 posts
3/7/2006 11:53 pm

Except bars contain alcoholics and too much noise. I am glad bars no longer have too much smoke...

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