Darwin Award mottos!  

redmustang91 58M  
8979 posts
12/27/2005 9:04 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Darwin Award mottos!

These awards are for those fools improving the gene pool by eliminating themselves! Damn funny!

Darwin Awards Mottos
favorite mottos suggested by readers

Survival of the Fittest

The tree of life is self pruning. -Joel Determan
I think not, therefore I am not.
Stupidity is a capitol offence.
Tragic Proof of a Missing 'Why?' Chromosome. -Frank Micle
Tales From the Shallow End (of the gene pool) -Jeff and Esrafael Dumb, Dumber, Darwin -Nigel Hayes Evolution Takes a Detour -George Magnuson

All people improve the gene pool, some by birth, some by their demise.-A. Chamberlain

Darwin Awards: Gene Therapy -Gregg Adams
"You are the weakest link. Goodbye!" -JW

Sperm: To be fastest doesn't imply that you are smartest. -Enrique Herranz
Live and learn. Or you won't live long. -Joanne
Darwin Awards: The Martyrs of Evolution. -Frode Tveit
Natural laws have no pity. -Robert Heinlein
James Thurber said, "He who hesitates... is sometimes saved." -Rina
God's H.R. Department

"Fool proof systems do not take into account
the ingenuity of fools." -Ken Clayton

Pain is the price of stupidity. -Aaron Bunt
The Extinction of Species -Ken Tholke
Natural Selection in Action -Ken Tholke
Population Control Volunteers -Rod
Chlorinating the Gene Pool -Ed, Jeff Gowdy
Die and Learn. -Greg Hanes

Nature's way of saying goodbye. -Chad Rogers
A Fool and His Life Are Soon Parted -Greg
One gene short of a chromosome. -Tom J
Stupid Human Tricks - Wurdulac

I saw a book titled "Sex for Dummies" and wondered why
anyone would teach dumb people how to reproduce?
-Lynda-Marie Hauptman

(gene pool) Lifeguard Is Now Off Duty -Kevin 84
Dysfunctional Genomics -Murphy
Unnatural Selection - Brian Peters
Sometimes You Darwin, Sometimes You Darlose -Felz
A ounce of common sense is worth more than a ton of intelligence.

Where the gene pool thins to a mere trickle-Szabo

Are You Missing a Helix? - Matt Molnar
And We Are the Top of the Food Chain? -Joanne
Why? Because! -Philip J. Shirk
Adding Insult to Injury - Pete

Stupidity is its own reward. -Jay
Evolution Fights Back -Jay
Lifeguarding the Gene Pool -ed
Stupid is as stupid does.
Stupid is as stupid dies - Dean Hopkins
Making the Human Race Smarter, One Idiot at a Time. -Andrew

If Teaching Evolution is Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Evolve. -Ed Marble
Death by Natural Selection -Dan Ryan
Evolution's Revenge -AJ

Famous Last Words I: I bet no one's ever done this be...
Famous Last Words II: It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Famous Last Words III: Watch this!

Evolution For The Hell Of It.
Where Evolution Hits the Pavement. -Ingrid
Too Stupid to Live. -Jonathan Sinclair
Gene Pool Reject - Danny Comsa


Culling the Herd -Jolem
Murphy's Law Personified -John
Caution: Natural Selection at Work -T. Agosti
Selection? Naturally! -T. Agosti
"Who knew?" -W Miller

Gene Pool Belly Flops. -Mumbly Joe
Better Genes for Better Living. -Jon
Better Living Through Natural Selection. -Kevin
I'm glad I didn't think of that! -Laird Boy
Better off Dead -DB Coward

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. -R. Bullitt
Have a nice trip! See you next fall! -Matt Doughty
The difference between genius and idiocy? Genius has its limits. -TWS

Genius may have its limitations,
but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
Bill Liebler quoting Elbert Hubbard

Gene Pollution
Homo stupidiens
Evolution: The lean, mean gene machine.
Vanish and better the whole human race.
And the winner is.... Eliminated!

Eliminate warning labels: Help natural slection!
You can learn a lot from a dummy. -Jim Ozols
Better Dead than In-Bred -Darzilla
Ready, Fire, Aim! -SKY

Reincarnation: Let's you keep trying til you get it right! -Hawk
Where Action Precedes Thought -Robert S

Celibacy is not hereditary. Too bad stupidity is.

Veni, vidi, voops! I came, I saw, I tripped. -John
Give up! The stone wall always wins! -Wokster
Returning the genes that don't fit! -jennifer
Permission to live...DENIED! -Bucket

You can lead a man to knowledge, but you can't make him think!

Friends Accumulate, But Idiots Multiply Exponentially -Ev DaSilva
Replace the gene pool filter, it's backing up!
Just another ripple in the gene pool of life. -D.Landrum
Darwin and Newton share a hearty laugh. -Meaty
Make it idiotproof, and we'll make better idiots. -J Ritter

Dumber than a bag of hammers.
Stupider than a box of rocks.
K.A. Davis

Forget the adage about learning from your own mistakes. It's safer and more entertaining to learn from other people's mistakes!

The one award you hope you don't ever win! -Citron
The stitching on the genes is coming undone!
One sandwich short of a picnic -M.A. Mayer
One can(not) learn from a fatal error! -R .Duke

Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain. -Friedrich von Schiller

Logic is the cement of our civilization, with which we ascend from chaos, using reason as our guide. Or not.

Stupidity is a sexually transmitted (and terminal) disease. -A Johnson

I say, I say that boy'sas sharp as a sack of wet mice!
D. West's Foghorn Leghorn voice

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.
The world's full of oxygen thieves. -K.Morrow
Behold the power of stupidity. -Dan K.
Got Brains? -N. Wanzer

Famous Last Words:
I double dog dare ya! -Nate
I wonder what this button does? -David B. Appleton
Safe? of course it's safe! -Alan

How proud our ancestors must be.

It's smarter to be lucky than it's lucky to be smart.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most
Darwin Awards: From Monkeys To Morons -J Sharpe
Darwin's waiting room is never empty. -Lou

There are two things in the universe
that are truly abundant: Hydrogen and Stupidity.
Frank Zappa

Idiot proof is easy. Now, cretin proof, thats a challenge. -Graham
Gravityt's not just a good idea;It's the law!
Pain is a great teacher -T. O'Neil

Never underestimate the power of human stupidity--Robert Heinlein
Dan Flanders' Robert Heinlein quote

Everyone starts off with a bag full of luck
and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the experience bag befor the luck bag is empty.

Stupidity Never Sleeps (former safety officer)
The intelligence of the planet is a constant.
The population is increasing.

The intelligence of a group is determined
by taking the lowest IQ in the group and dividing it by the number of people in the group.

God must love stupid people, he makes so many.
Stand back folks, Evolution in progress! -Charles
They gave their lives to clean the gene pool. -Ken
Cogito, ergo sum confusus. -DGardiner
Retroactive birth control. -Mike

In the fight between you and the world, back the world. -CDD00
Dumb as a box of hair.-CD

I see no problems between us that could not be solved by your departure.

I did not go to his funeral, but I wrote a nice letter saying I approved of it.
-Mark Twain

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.
Abe Lincoln

Another poster child for birth control. -Tony E.
Terminal stupidity is a self-limiting disease. -Ed
Skimming the Debris from theGene Pool

See the Happy Moron
He Doesn't Give A Damn
I wish I were a Moron
My God! Perhaps I am!

Keeping a date with dense-ity -Urban Hermit
Proof that God has a warped sense of humor.
If you don't succeed the first time, then skydiving is not for you

The creative answer to the question,'To be or not to be.' -Armour

Learn from the mistakes of others.
You won't live long enough to make them all yourself.

Sinking the cueball on the gene pool table.
There's a fine line between bravery and stupidity.
In the ongoing battle between aeroplanes and
the ground, the ground has yet to lose.
Graham Bartlett

I like my thumbs. - Alan C.

A high IQ doesn't make up for a lack of common sense. -Flyn_Falcon
Evolution: Taking care of those too stupid to take care of themselves. -aille

When the world is made to be idiot-proof,
the world will become overpopulated with idiots.
Mark Twain

To be or not to be...
The line between genius and madness is very fine.
Out of billions of opportunities, these sperm were the best?

'Splat' happens! -Christian
You do not need a parachute to skydive.
You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

It's not the fall that kills you, it'sudden deceleration syndrome. -Chris
Death comes to all men, but some just can't wait.
Where there's a fool, there's a way. -K.Koch

I support evolution! and they can have my
opposable thumbs when they pry them
from my cold, dead hands!

You're only depriving some poor village of it's idiot. -Sophia J.
It's only funny until someone gets hurt... then it's hilarious!

Life is too important to be taken seriously!
They sunk because they hadn't thunk.- czarzie
The Award people are dying to get -Cray
Is this the best we can be? -Nathan E.

Remember, half of the people you know are below average. Natural Selection is merely attempting
to decrease that proportion.

Where the ignorant meet their logical conclusions. -Penth
God's Great Banana Peel -Darwin
Nature's UNDO key.-Rich

Natural contraception. -Gary Townend
Somebody peed in the gene pool. -Rich
Stupidity is self-correcting. -Dusty
Death cures insomnia. -Janne Hirvonen

Natural Deselection -compton

Ultimately, we are the solution to our own stupidity.
A "drive to survive" the size of a lemming's...
The gene pool just got a little shallower...
Fame is fleeting, but dumb is forever.
Evidence that God is still in charge.
Things that make you say, "Hmmm."
Darwin's Rake Hard at Work.
"If I only had a brain..."
Candy for a sick mind.
Retroactive abortion.
Mental Midgets

Dead No-Wits Society
Another Sap from the Tree of Life
T. Agosti

"Evolution is Evolution is not an option; It's mandatory! -Mr. E

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
There is nothing more frightful than ignorance in action. -Walter Kerr
What people call fate is mostly their own stupidity. -Arthur Schopenhauer
There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence. -Henry Adams
There are more fools in the world than there are people. -Heinrich Heine
...and an anti-motto:
"It is not clear that intelligence
has any long-term survival value." -Stephen Hawking

Darwin: "I regret to inform you that the motto beloved by Unix 'fortune' acolytes, 'It may be that your sole purpose is to simply serve as a warning to others' may not be used as a Darwin Awards motto, due to legal restraints! So please stop submitting it. Thank you!

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