when it's good to be a catlady...  

real36CgirlPA 39F
443 posts
8/10/2006 6:57 pm

Last Read:
8/16/2006 5:00 pm

when it's good to be a catlady...

One of my friends was out of town for about a week and she just got back today. Her new boyfriend went along with her and her younger daughters. Soooo....I had to pretty much ask, as a sworn catlady,"Did you figure out how annoying he would be to live with?"

This friend of mine is sort of like me-- her privacy is very important to her. She needs to be left the fuck alone sometimes. The new bf (they've MAYBE been dating a month and a half?) is currently at her house trying to stay and hang out the whole weekend. They were around each other for a whole week already. She confirmed many annoying traits that she had previously suspected (like his obsession with bathing 3X a day, even when roughing it) and found a plethora of new ones, like his inability to understand that she isn't interested in talking about sports or him all the time.

I told her to tell him that I harrassed her to help me pack stuff over the weekend. He apparently doesn't understand the concept of personal space and she wants to drop him off at his house so she can have some time to herself. I'd have bolted already if I were her, but that is usually what I do when someone tries to crawl up my ass...

flagg134 37M
1582 posts
8/10/2006 8:32 pm

Damn that was quick usually it takes a decision to move together for good for those annoying or endearing quirks to show up. I guess some people just don't pay attention to the image they put off of themselves. I suppose it is for the better to learn like that before a decision is made though.


real36CgirlPA replies on 8/10/2006 9:06 pm:
I agree. He must have really latched onto her when they were in isolation. I think she realized they had a lot less in common than it originally seemed.

Djeeper1987 48M

8/10/2006 8:55 pm

Personal space is so important. I mean sure you date one and half months, but don't stay the whole damn weekend. Are you NUTS!?
I would not stay unless ask too. Otherwise, I would wait a long time before I felt ready to stick around for a weekend or let alone a week.
I think her bf is crazy if you ask me!!!

Carpe Diem

real36CgirlPA replies on 8/10/2006 9:08 pm:
Yep. They already spent a whole week together. You'd think he would have been ready to spend some time alone. I don't really know this guy, but I have a suspicion he is going to cling harder the more she pulls away.

JazzDlight 60F

8/11/2006 4:38 am

Yikes, does not sound good and I god you make me laugh with your analogy of things....I know I said this before but I swear we are fucking related....Hugs, Jazz

real36CgirlPA replies on 8/12/2006 8:34 am:
We probably are related. My mom's side of the family ia all over the place. But yep, the situation makes me feel less depressed about being single...lol.

rm_VoodooGuru1 50M
2053 posts
8/11/2006 5:23 am

Guys aren't exceptional when it comes to non-verbal communication, nor do many know the differences between gender styles and reasons for communication. Here's the thing though - women often expect men to understand the rules of female communication, but don't bother to learn male communication rules.

Yes, sometimes we do need to be hit over the head... we're not so good at subtle.

She should just tell him clearly that she needs some time to herself, and she should be specific. "I'd like to see you Friday night and I need to have Sunday all to myself."

Now... in general, I don't think people should introduce young children to B/GFs for at least a few months, and considering living together with a child after only six weeks is borderline dysfunctional. The guy exhibits OCD behaviour... OCD is not real compatible with little ones, eh? They always have chocolate around their mouths, snot running down their noses, dirt on the back of their necks, and often have invertebrates in their pockets.

But then again... so do I.

real36CgirlPA replies on 8/12/2006 8:39 am:
The scary thing is that she already sat him down to have a talk about respecting her personal space because it is important to her that he should respect that if they are going to continue dating. He apparently thinks he can change her mind? She is starting to suspect that he may be a tad bit clingy. I think you're right about the OCD. She told me yesterday he is a total neat freak and can't sit still without at least tapping his fingers.

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