Journey to the Pole  

poledancer1963 54F
9 posts
5/31/2006 6:20 am

Last Read:
6/19/2006 9:12 am

Journey to the Pole

There's a place deep inside every woman's heart where she holds precious things...first kiss, proms, first time; adolescent memories that only the young lady who placed them there truly comprehends the value of. Imagine meeting "The One" at age 12, dating them throughout HS and tucking all of those memories away in that special place in your heart. Life moves on, as do you and they become a part of the person you become but are not the person you become because you marry someone else.
15 years later your marriage is in trouble. The hubby says you have no sex drive and that you need to see a doctor to discover why. For years you carry and accept the blame. You are defective. Doing this is so much easier than admitting that you just aren't attracted to him anymore and his touch is like cold water. Meanwhile; he would rather take his own satisfaction from porn and by having a "special" friendship with his supervisor at work.
One day you decide if he can have a friend outside of the marriage then so can you and begin the search for "The One", find him and send him an email just to say "Hi".
Three months later you have left your hubby for "The One" and for two months are the happiest you've ever been in your life. You've discovered that you are not "defective" but rather a sex fiend who can't get enough. One day you come home and without warning he has packed his belongings and returned to the wife he had left for you.
Congratulations! You've won a five day trip to the mental ward at the local hospital, a lonely apartment and the satisfaction of knowing you've lost eveything! Including the respect of your friends and family who sadly shake their heads and say, "I told you so." (Now that is even better than a box of Rice A Roni!) Can't beat that!
Perhaps the greatest loss of all is that of the keeping of all of those precious things in your heart. You aren't allowed to think of them anymore because afterall, they involve "The One".
That first kiss- don't think about it! Your school proms - throw away the pictures! The first time - not special anymore! All of those memories are now taboo. You're not allowed to even think about them.
You wonder in anger were they stolen or did you loose them due to your own foolish behavior?
Perhaps the only good thing that came from the whole sorted mess was that you discovered you weren't defective.
That's when the real punishment for your crimes begin as well as the journey to the pole.

Blues57nc 60M

6/1/2006 6:40 am

The journey, such a painful one at times. Those memories that become red hot, that we cannot touch because of the pain... I have my share, and try to find the good, such as being open and vulnerable and discovering your sexuality. But forgiving one's self is hard.

TxMale_looking 42M

6/13/2006 6:38 pm

Thats such a difficult situation, but you sound like such a hottie. I'll be your "friend" any day.

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