pecs29 42M
13 posts
2/25/2006 9:14 am

Last Read:
7/6/2007 4:15 pm


What is love?

This age-old question has been argued, debated, and philosophized from the very inception of time. I’m sure Adam and Eve were debating this topic with each other back in the Garden of Eden.

Or, if you believe in evolution, then some of our hairy little cousins were screaming at each other in monkey gibberish about this very same topic.

Something so simplistic yet a bare ocean full of different possible meanings and explanations. Poems, movies, songs, lyrics, novels, stories, sonnets, statues, paintings, sculptures, buildings, cities, states, countries, and even wars waged.

All in the name of the most powerful four letters ever linked together by mankind. The meaning itself has evolved over the centuries, yet at its core remains true today.

Great poets and writers like my boy Billy S. who grew up in the 1500’s. Sorry, you probably know my Billy Boy by his more famous and formal name, William Shakespeare who has created endless masterpieces of literature all in the name of defining love (such as the snippet below of his genius that he wrote about what is love.)

“Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs. Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers' eyes. Being vexed, a sea nourished with lovers' tears. What is it else? A madness most discreet, a choking gall and a preserving sweet.” - William Shakespeare

A madness most discreet. God, I love that line. I would have loved the chance, just one time, to get totally drunk with that man for a night over some good ole Jack Daniels.

I won’t try to bore you with my weak attempt to define love in a manner such as William Shakespeare.

How did people define love before Christ’s time? I’m talking 384 B.C folks.

Way back when people actually prayed and worshipped to Zeus, Athena, Aries, Apollo, Aphrodite, and the other Greek gods. Did they think differently about what is love compared to our modern day materialistic society.

Perhaps, but then again, maybe not. One of my favorite all-time philosophers I believe says it amazingly in just ten poetic words he strings together. He needed just ten words to sum up man’s total reason for being on this earth.

“Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.” - Aristotle

Take a hard think break and ponder that deeply laced statement for a quick second. A single soul inhabiting two bodies. What beautiful insight and wisdom that even thousands of years later has such a profound effect on yet another generation of people.

I forget; are we the X generation or XYZ now?

We have now got a definition of what is love from a famed 1500’s writer and a B.C (Before Christ) philosopher. I think it would be only fitting to include a quote from a famed writer and director from the ultra modern 20th century, don’t you?

In comparison, you might see a slight difference that the times have had on our perceptions of how we define what is love and how it feels.

I was nauseous and tingly all over. . . . I was either in love or I had smallpox. - Woody Allen

Love him or hate him, Woody Allen - an American original. Love or small pox! I agree with Woody there about the same, really! I haven’t had small pox but I bet it’s not the most pleasant, I imagine.

Ok, the whole married-his-adopted-daughter thing was beyond icky and just perverted! But, if he had done that in Kentucky, it would have been no big deal! LOL!

Sigh…I’m exhausted now, aren’t you. In that short time we covered the centuries in history and how they each perceived and tried to define what is love.

Quit dodging the question already, Ben, and just tell them what love means to your Texas way of thinking! Keep your pants; on I’m getting there. Patience - it is a bitch of a virtue, what can I say?

Well, let’s start off first with what love is not to me, shall we?

Love is not about the three little words that are strategically placed on millions (maybe billions) of little hallmark cards you buy for $1.99 by mega conglomerate companies or those simple words people throw out like the garbage every week that we have all heard so many times in vain.

It’s not about buying someone flowers, candy, jewelry, cute stuffed animals, balloons, dinner and a movie, or any other gift that can be purchased with a cheap swipe of a credit card or quick pen swoop in an almost broke checkbook at your local strip mall.

The most powerful words that the world has ever known get violently vomited out, sadly, by people today so much now you would think it was a famous scene from the movie, Stand By Me with Lard Ass. (Note: If you don’t know what I mean, go rent the movie; you will laugh your ass off and get what I mean!)

In this ADD, fast food, I want-it-now daddy, ego-centric, selfish, shallow, materialistic, screw your bosses and neighbor’s wife, dishonest, disloyal, hypocritical, close-minded, co-dependent, and instant gratification society we are now forced to live in, what most people think is love is so far from it, in reality it’s most always…

Circumstances (Have a kid together accidentally)
Or financial security or stability

Love is to me many enduring, compassionate and selfless actions repeated over a long period of time - not hollow words spoken or written on some painted tree bark that you put a stamp on and mail out conveniently.

That is what love is at its purest core.

This is what love means to me…

It's about tolerance, patience, understanding, compassion, giving, being selfless, sacrifice, compromise, being supportive, open minded, thoughtful, forgiving, loyal, not possessive, jealous, or controlling of the other person, nurturing, honest, dependable, you want a person you love to be happy always above all else, challenging them to their core even when they are uncomfortable with it at the time, because you know it will help them grow as a person, and above all else, you would rather die than hurt the other person you love so much in any way, shape or form.

They hurt…you hurt.

They’re in pain…you’re in pain.

A quick glimpse of they’re angelic smile or sound of they’re contagious giggle makes your heart glow red like the burning sun on a hot summer day.

Love is sitting up all night with your love at the hospital because they’re dying from cancer, holding their hair out of their face while they puke painfully from hellish months of chemotherapy and radiation.

Love is accepting every fault, issue or weakness the other person has, because you know they accept all of yours without question.

Love is getting up in the middle of the night when you’re at your wit’s end and utterly exhausted to comfort your screaming newborn baby. Because you know your love needs a night off even more than you do.

It’s not pretty, cute, romantic, or TV-movie-of-the-week crap.

It’s simply real and breathtakingly ugly at times.

That's what the essence of LOVE truly is!

A word of caution when you’re thinking about saying those three little words or when someone says them to you, think about what love really is.

Be somberly honest with yourself and figure out if that is how you really feel about that person; and do the actions of that person telling you those three words say love, or are they just words to you?

One of my favorite quotes I have memorized is perfect for this subject, I think. I hope all that read this will take it to heart and burn it into your mind and heart forever.

“The Greatest Danger For Most Of Us Is Not That Our Aim In Life Is Too High And We Miss It; It’s That Our Aim Is Too Low And We Hit It.” - Michelangelo

True unyielding love is once in a lifetime, and that’s if the love gods bless you more than any one person ever really deserves. You won’t see it, smell it, taste it, or hear it, mind you.

If you don’t pay attention, you won’t even be ready to feel it hit you like an out-of-control freight train, poised to level your whole existence under the cover of the cool night’s calmness.

Passionate Ben
Online Dating, Romance, and Dating Expert. Not to mention lover and avid S/M top! : D

fittedfaith10 49F

5/21/2007 10:19 pm

This is so true. I see so many people say they are in love but for all the wrong reasons. You have a great way of expressing what you feel. That's a great thing. I've enjoyed reading these. I'm sure I'll be back to read more.
Thanks for the insite.

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